Family friend! A play for 4-5 people. Comedy and a little drama

ATTENTION! ALL COPYRIGHTS TO THE PLAY ARE PROTECTED BY THE LAWS OF RUSSIA, INTERNATIONAL LEGISLATION, AND BELONG TO THE AUTHOR. IT IS PROHIBITED TO PUBLISH AND REPUBLISH IT, REPRODUCE IT, PERFORM IT PUBLICLY, TRANSLATE IT INTO FOREIGN LANGUAGES, OR MAKE CHANGES TO THE TEXT OF THE PLAY WHEN IT IS STAGED WITHOUT THE WRITTEN PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR. THE PLAY CAN ONLY BE STAGED AFTER A DIRECT CONTRACT IS CONCLUDED BETWEEN THE AUTHOR AND THE THEATER.

Play for 4 or 5 people "Family Friend»

Comedy. Drama. Duration: 1 hour and 20 minutes.

CHARACTERS OF THE

male GENE

wife-ALBINA

family friend-STASIK

girlfriend-NONA

Hobby-PANTELEI

The role of Pantelei can be combined, if necessary, with the role of Gena or Stasik.

1 SQUARE

The lyric introduction – the musical theme of the play (the composition "Yuri Tarasenko and Victoria Artyukhova – You are here and I am now" is recommended) is played until 1 minute 45 seconds, then the speech of the actors begins.

So, the music starts playing, after a few seconds, the curtain opens.

The evening square conveys its atmosphere of warmth of a tired city.

In the square there is a bench, around nature, freedom, spacious and easy. A street lamp is dimly lit.

With a tired step, but with a happy face, practically dragging a lady's purse on the floor, Albina enters the stage. She's coming home from work. He takes a few steps, stops, remembers something, remembers pleasant moments. He takes a few more steps, looks around, and sits down on the bench. She puts her purse down next to it, leans back, and inhales deeply.

At this point, the music stops (1 minute 45 seconds pass)

ALBINA (thoughtfully): Yes …

Albina with a slap puts her hand on her forehead, rubs her face, sits back, resting her chin on her hand, and resting her elbow on her knee.

ALBINA (thoughtfully): No, not exactly a "Yes" … but… You've got it, Albina Alexeyevna… in my old age… Well, not that in my old age, not yet forty, but somehow still not at the age that this is all happening to me now…, and the situation is not the same, oh, not the same … Ah…, you fell on my head… Pantaleika … the

music continues to play.

Pantelei appears in the square. Albina notices him at once. Their views intersect and speak for themselves. They are happy, they are young again, they are stupid and naive again. Pantelei takes timid, playful steps towards Albina, and Albina jumps down from the bench and hides behind it.

They play catch-up, around the bench, frolicking like children. They smile and laugh. They feel good. But they don't touch each other. Their relationship is sublime, no lust or even a hint of it.

Albina runs off to the side, turns around, says goodbye to Pantelei with an apologetic look, and reluctantly leaves.

The music ends.

Pantelei sits down, inspired, on the bench where Albina had just been sitting.

The song ends, and the music stops.

PANTELEI

Pantelei sits down more comfortably, rubs his knees playfully, and with a sly smile and a twinkle in his eyes continues his delicate thought.

PANTELEI (thoughtfully): Yes…, there is no other way to say it. No, Pantelei, this young lady will not leave your mind, your heart, your imagination so easily… Albina… That's life, isn't it? You live yourself a little calm, you don't touch anyone, and suddenly ON! You meet a person who…

Pantelei tries to portray something with gestures, but he is not very good at it.

PANTELEI (emotionally): That's how they do it, huh? Men? Does anyone know how they do it? After all, here you look – and the height is like everyone else's and the figure is plus or minus. Two arms, two legs, some kind of hairstyle on the head, perfume, manicure… Well, it's just like everyone else. But here they take something that is not in anyone else! And this is different… you can't explain it to yourself, but you can feel it! And so you feel that you do not know where to go.

Pantelei gets up nervously from the bench and walks around.

PANTELEI (emotionally): You start behaving like a fool, talking all sorts of nonsense. Smile like a blockhead and… Yes, you all know what to explain… Oh, women… Interesting characters.

Lyrical music sounds.

Pantelei leaves the stage.

ZTM.

2 THE HOUSE OF ALBINA AND THE GENES

Albina returns home. Her mood is high. A radiant smile shines on his face. She hums to herself, twirls, dances. He changes clothes, starts to do the housework, and starts cleaning. He puts the stool back in its place, checks the dust on the shelves with his finger. He notices a bunch of things on the couch. He picks up the pile, lifts it to carry it away, and suddenly hears a man's cry from under the things.

As it turns out, Stasik is sleeping on the couch under the things.

STASIK (loudly, frightened): A....!!!

Albina drops her things back on the sofa, screams, and jumps to the side.

ALBINA (loudly, frightened): A....

Stasik looks discontentedly at Albina, judging her with a look that has swum from sleep.

STASIK (loudly, indignantly, holding his ear): Aaaaa!

ALBINA (nervously, indignantly, shaking and stammering): Stasik! Scared the hell out of me.... dddddd… to the point of shaking. What the hell are you doing here?

STASIK (indignantly, holding his ear and writhing in pain): I get serious injuries, by your efforts! Albin, give me the peroxide, will you? You caught my ear with your fingernail. I slept to myself, I didn't touch anyone. So come and visit you.

Albina shakes her hands nervously, indignantly, and goes to get the peroxide. He returns with a tube of peroxide and cotton pads.

ALBINA (unscrewing the lid of the tube as she goes): Come on, I'll see what you have for injuries …

Stasik kindly provides his ear.

Albina handles it.

Stasik hisses, for he pinches the wound.

ALBINA (examining the ear): Normal. You'll live… unfortunately.

Albina sits down next to me on the sofa.

Stasik also sits down more freely and comfortably, looking at Albina with displeasure.

ALBINA (EXHALING): Gena gave you the keys, didn't he?

STASIK (annoyed): Who else?

ALBINA (reproachfully): What is it this time?

Stasik looks at Albina with resentment. He gets up from the sofa and walks silently into the kitchen.

Albina throws up her hands indignantly.

Stasik returns with a mug of tea, and a steering wheel in his hand. And not only in the hand, some of it is already in the mouth.

STASIK (chewing, reproachfully): Here! That's why they say that there is no female friendship! You are not able to sympathize, compassion is not your patrimony!

ALBINA (with sarcasm): Oh! Oh… the words are what I have gathered. Compassion, patrimony. Where does it come from? Stasik, I really don't recognize you…

Stasik eats a bagel with an appetite, washes it down with tea, while making the characteristic sounds of chomping and sucking.

ALBINA (calmly): No, it's all right. I'll find out. Why are you here, I ask??? What the hell are you doing sleeping on our couch, you pestilent one!

Stasik calmly finishes with a bagel, washes it down, puts the mug on the shelf, wipes his mouth with his hand, wipes his hands on his trousers, sits down on the sofa in sadness.

STASIK (in sadness): I have, by the way, an Albinochka, a big grief!

ALBINA (feigned): Yes, what are you?

STASIK (in sadness): Imagine.

ALBINA (feigned): I'm all ears…

Stasik lets out a tear, he can't speak directly from longing and deep experience.

Albina stands up indignantly, but does not move away.

ALBINA (seriously and somewhat sternly): Listen, my dear friend! Actor, big and small theaters. You give me here let's stop fooling around Roly. What can happen to you? You won't get fired from your job because you don't work. Your child won't get sick, because you don't have any children. Your wife will not leave you and will not change for lack of it. The bank will not take the apartment for non-payment of the mortgage, either, because you are not burdened with anything in this life.

Albina gradually raises her tone to the maximum display of her indignation.

ALBINA (sternly, loudly): No loans, no debts, no problems, no worries. What difficulties can you have, Stasik! What kind of grief are you trying to give me here?

STASIK (in sadness, seriously, quietly): Mom …

Albina stops, her breath is coming out of her throat.

ALBINA (apologetically, fearfully, sympathetically): Eleonora Vitoldovna?

STASIK (almost crying, seriously, quietly): Yes…

Albina sits down on the sofa and looks at Stasik sympathetically. Timidly sits down next to him, feels sorry for him, pats him sympathetically on the head, leaning his head on the shoulder of a desperate man in life.

ALBINA (in sadness): Such a good woman …

Stasik, nodding, nodding his head.

ALBINA (in sadness): I didn't know her for many years, but somehow I got into her. She's like that… A sympathetic, sweet woman. The soul is a person.

STASIK (almost crying, seriously, quietly): Yeah… a good one… responsive… The soul is a person.

Both are silent in a state of grief, Albina continues to slowly gently soothe Stasik on the head.

STASIK (strictly with condemnation): This good, kind woman told me today that she was tired of feeding me! She left me without lunch, we had an argument, and I left… here to you.

ALBINA (freezes in confusion): And … eeeeeeeeeeeee what?

STASIK (calmly): That's it. And here I am. Well, you asked me what I was doing here. Here, I explained.

Albina, realizing what is what, gives Stasik a weighty, capacious slap on the head.

STASIK (writhing): Ah! For what?

ALBINA (in restrained rage): Yes, for that! Think what you're saying, damned one. I already thought that your mother was worth it …

STASIK (not understanding):

ALBINA (waving her hand away): Oh, come on.

Albina exhales, takes a couple of steps back, tries to calm down.

The door to the apartment opens, Gena enters, Albina does not see him, turns to Stasik and spills out everything that she thinks about him.

ALBINA (on emotions): Parasite! Good-for-nothing! Ohlamon! Ballast! You worthless loser! Not a man!

Gena looks at the whole picture in some confusion, drops her work bag, and throws up her hands in question. Albina turns at the sound. Stasik looks pitifully at Gena, seeking his salvation and protection.

Albina tries to explain something with gestures, but when she can't find the words, she drops her hands and exhales languidly.

3 THE HOUSE OF ALBINA AND THE GENES

All three of them are sitting at the table, in a friendly, very warm atmosphere, having dinner with a very big appetite. Stasik has a particularly brutal appetite.

ALBINA (Gene, in the process of eating): … well, here it is. Can you imagine my condition? He's in trouble, you know.

GENE (calmly, Albine, in the process of eating): Why should I be surprised? Stasik is in his repertoire.

ALBINA (Gene, in the process of eating): That's for sure.

STASIK (to the couple, leaning on the food): My friends… You won't believe it. My mom and I are like one. Like Alpha and Omega, like two banks of the same river, like day and night in the system of the universe, like …

ALBINA, GENA (chorus, interrupting): Yes, we already understood!

Stasik is quiet for a moment, running a gentle glance at Gena and Albina.

STASIK (to the couple, leaning on the food): Yeah. And now our unsinkable family cruiser has cracked. It's like a hole, my friends.

ALBINA (to Stasik, finishing the meal): You've had a hole in your head for a long time, my friend calico, not in some figurative family cruiser.

Stasik looks indignantly at Albina. Glances at Gena, with a look that seems to say to him: eh, friend, why is she looking at me like that? Help me somehow or something, influence your spouse!!!

Albina gets up from the table, sits on the sofa.

ALBINA (to Stasik): Tell me, just be honest. Are you going to sit on your mother's neck and on ours all your life? Tea isn't a boy anymore? It's about time I got my act together. There must be some responsibility, some seriousness.

Gena finishes the meal, goes to the sofa, sits down next to his wife.

GENA (to Stasik, trying to smooth out the corners): My friend, Albina wants to say that it's time for you to have your own family. To deal with larger issues than the ones you are currently dealing with.

STASIK (not understanding, continuing to lean on the food): Yes? M… and what questions am I dealing with now?

ALBINA (to Stasik): And you, Stasik, as long as I know you, do only one thing. You create problems for yourself, and then you heroically overcome them. Only for some reason, every time with our help.

STASIK (indignantly): Not true! (looking at his friend) Tell me, Gena?

Gena shrugs uncertainly and looks away.

STASIK (indignantly): What are you doing? Remember at least that story with the kettle in the store. Remember? Well, we went to the hypermarket together when I accidentally hit this glass teapot in the window with my cart. Who ever thought of making such low display cases and such glass teapots?

ALBINA (to Stasik): Well, we remember, and what are you doing well in that situation, let me ask?

STASIK (indignantly): How about what? How about what? After all, I myself found the senior salesman then and settled this delicate issue with him.

ALBINA (laughing indignantly): Ha! Settled it.

GENA (Stasiku): It wasn't quite like that. Rather, it was the senior salesman patiently waiting for you to get tired of hiding from him in the toilet, and then a conversation took place, as a result of which Albina and I had to compensate for the damage you caused.

STASIK (indignantly): These are the details! In fact, I myself then"sorted out" everything! Well, big deal, we borrowed a friend a couple of thousand. Now you will spend your whole life reproaching this.

ALBINA (indignantly): Well, let's put not a couple, but a three. And then the word "borrowed" – suggests a certain return on debt. And we said goodbye to our money, as it seems, forever. You haven't been in a hurry to return this amount to us all this time.

Конец ознакомительного фрагмента.

Текст предоставлен ООО «ЛитРес».

Прочитайте эту книгу целиком, купив полную легальную версию на ЛитРес.

Безопасно оплатить книгу можно банковской картой Visa, MasterCard, Maestro, со счета мобильного телефона, с платежного терминала, в салоне МТС или Связной, через PayPal, WebMoney, Яндекс.Деньги, QIWI Кошелек, бонусными картами или другим удобным Вам способом.