Trapped

It’d been a crazy twenty-four hours. First his father with Max. Then Maggie. The reason he’d gone on his bender in the first place. The woman he loved but was supposed to hate.

If the circumstances had ever been likely to get better, if he’d ever been brave enough to try to broach the subject of their relationship with his parents, it definitely wasn’t going to happen now. There’d be all-out war. Once again he and Maggie would be stuck in the middle as they’d always been – and now Harley was stuck in the middle of it too.

Thinking of his daughter made Johnny flinch. After Thelma, the ex-Tom from the sauna, had moved to be near her old man in Maidstone, it’d all gone tit over head. He’d been lucky to find someone like her in the first place and it would be impossible to find anyone to replace her. So then it’d become complicated, and Johnny Taylor didn’t like complicated. He wasn’t very good at it.

All his life his parents had sorted everything out for him. He’d never needed to make any real decisions. Even when Harley was born he didn’t really need to worry, as Maggie had been happy to sort out all the day-to-day care of the baby, and he’d been happy to sort out the cash. Cash was the easy part. But difficult, complicated responsibility, he didn’t know how to do.

The problem was Thelma had been perfect. She was like Mary Poppins, taking Harley all over London; to zoos, to parks, to museums. Making cakes, painting pictures and always making sure Harley was beautifully dressed. And his daughter had been happy. The only other person he’d ever seen shower so much love on a child was his own mother when he was a child.

He’d been grateful to Thelma but Thelma had also been grateful to him. She’d gone from being shagged up the arse by strangers and giving ten pound blow jobs to being paid to spend her time going out on day trips in the company of his angelic little girl.

When she’d left he’d panicked. He’d even offered her ten grand to stay, but she’d been adamant she wanted to go to Maidstone. And there was no one else. In Johnny’s world strangers weren’t to be trusted. There was no way he could bring someone in who didn’t have a life like himself, who didn’t know the score. It could easily mean having the whistle blown – not only on himself but on his father’s businesses as well. There was no way he could’ve taken the risk.

He’d talked the problem over with Nicky who’d told him not to worry. Within a couple of hours he’d come back to him, telling him he’d sorted it. Sorted it in the shape of Gina Daniels.

Harley had been so upset when he’d taken her to meet Gina, who was a world away from the warm colourful cockney character of Thelma. He hadn’t been able to handle it. Didn’t know how to make it better for his daughter. So what he’d done, to his shame, was hand a crying Harley over then and there in the street, rather than take her to Gina’s to settle her in as planned.

He hadn’t bothered going to see her, even though he’d promised Maggie he’d help look after her. Though it wasn’t so much that he hadn’t been bothered, it was just he couldn’t cope with seeing his daughter upset. Begging him to let her go and stay with Auntie Thelma. All he wanted was for her to be happy. But Maggie wouldn’t see it like that. Maggie would see it as him palming Harley off to Gina Daniels and pretended she didn’t exist.

Johnny was a hard man in the eyes of many. Not a lot of Soho would cross him. He was the next generation of faces. But when it’d come down to standing up for his own, for his then, three year old daughter, he’d been weak. Hell, he’d been pathetic.

‘Hiding from someone?’

Johnny turned to see Saucers standing directly behind him. She looked as bad as he felt. Her hair was matted on one side of her head and even though Johnny knew she’d got up with him earlier on in the day, she looked as if she’d just rolled out of bed.

She had the same clothes on as the night before; a short black mini skirt barely skimming the cheeks of her backside, a tight grey top two sizes too small and a cropped white faux leather jacket on. It was clear as day to anyone what she did, as clear as if she’d had it branded on her forehead.

‘Who am I supposed to be hiding from?’

‘You tell me darling. I’m not the one with the complicated love life. My only love sprung from my only hate, too early seen unknown and known too late.’

Johnny shook his head. He didn’t need his head filled with Saucer’s crap now. ‘Do me a favour and keep it closed. I can’t be listening to any of your shit now.’

‘Shit? Johnny Taylor, go wash your mouth out with soap, you’ll have Bill twirling in his bleeding grave. I take it you haven’t seen Maggie yet?’

‘No, and to tell you the truth it’s killing me, but spare me the quotations.’

Saucers cackled and Johnny smiled at her warmly, watching as she took the novel she was carrying from under her arm to squash it into her tatty black bag. As much as he hated anybody knowing his business, he was grateful he could talk about it with Saucers if he needed to.

She’d found out when she’d caught them together after he’d sneaked Maggie into one of his father’s clip joints before opening hours. As he’d been the only one with the keys, he’d naturally presumed they’d be alone there and hadn’t counted on Saucers sticking her beak up from nowhere. When she’d walked into the main bar, he’d been shocked and hadn’t known what to say but as always, Saucers had made up for that. ‘Fuck me, this is a turn up for the books. A pair of star cross’d lovers. Romeo and Juliet

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