Some even say he killed her himself…
A shudder shook her. Her gaze shifted to the wooden tray at the opposite end of the counter. She picked up the cologne bottle made by a local perfumery. Inhaling the scent, she realized it held the same woodsy tone that Jonas wore, which had so muddled her senses earlier. Had Alana picked it out for him, or was it his choice? For an insane half moment, she hoped it was the latter.
Curiosity led her to the wooden door opposite the one leading to her room. Jonas’s room? Her hand hesitated for a second on the knob, but when she found it turned, she pushed it and went in.
She smiled. Now this room looked lived in. Unlike Alana’s pristine room, this place was a delightful mess. Magazines, papers, maps lay in disarray over every piece of man-size furniture. Clothes had been dropped in a heap on an easy chair and forgotten. Even the bed was mussed. Either Valentin’s housekeeping skills weren’t up to par, or Jonas didn’t like his privacy intruded upon.
Cathlynn expected the red, green and blue plaid comforter had been chosen more for comfort than eye appeal. She sat down on the edge of the bed in the darkened room, feeling its coziness while she ran a hand over the blue flannel sheets. She’d much rather sleep in this room than share the other with Alana’s ghost.
How long had it been since Alana and Jonas had shared a room? A bed? What would it be like to sleep with Jonas here? Would she feel secure or defenseless? Would he show her his blustery side, or would the sensuality promised by his full lips come through?
She blushed at the thought. She didn’t want to know. Not really. Because to know, she’d have to expose too much of herself, and she couldn’t afford to do that.
So lost was she in her daydream that she didn’t hear the footsteps behind her. When a hand buried itself erotically in her hair, she screamed and jumped off the bed. With her heart beating a hundred miles an hour, she whirled to face her attacker, hands forward in a defensive position. She found herself looking straight into Jonas’s remote face and desire-darkened eyes.
“Didn’t anyone ever tell you it’s dangerous to come into a man’s room uninvited?”
Chapter Three
“Didn’t anyone ever tell you it’s not nice to scare people out of their skins?” Cathlynn said, raising a hand to her tripping heart while the panicked rush of her pulse tried to regain its balance. Gray, like smoke, his silhouette had no sharp edges in the bedroom’s dusky light, Jonas looked more intimidating than ever. She shook her head to bury the primal betrayal of her body to his erotic touch of her hair.
As she moved to put distance between them, seeking to remove the disturbing threat of his nearness, his gaze fixed her unblinkingly. But she wasn’t fast enough. His hand caught her wrist, circling it like a warm manacle, holding fast like tempered steel. Her pulse bumped beneath his thumb, unmasking her cool exterior.
“A man’s room is where he dreams, where he conquers.” His free hand buried itself in her hair once more, bringing her face close to his as he whipped her cuffed hand behind her and pressed her body against his. Her lips parted involuntarily in anticipation of his kiss. A stab of fear pierced her gut at the violent storm in his eyes. Her skin snapped and crackled with static where their bodies met.
“Unless you’re prepared for the consequences,” he said, his breath vibrating against her lips, “I suggest you keep out of my room.”
She swallowed hard, wishing he’d let her go, hoping insanely he’d kiss her. “I’m sorry,” she said lamely. “I didn’t mean to intrude.”
He let her go abruptly. She fell back. Rubbing the wrist he’d held, she recalled his steely warmth, the echo of his pulse beating in opposition, then in rhythm, to hers, the rush of heat it had stirred in her blood. She wondered how his lips would have felt against hers. Would they have been soft as their fullness promised, or hard like the rest of his face?
Why did she care?
She shot him a quick glance. He grabbed a blue-heathered sweater from his dresser and pulled it over his head, nonchalantly, as if nothing had happened between them. And nothing had, she reminded herself, except for the temporary short-circuiting of her brain. The wool molded over his shoulders, accentuating their breadth, their might. He centered the knot of his tie between the starched collar of his white shirt. She looked away, not wanting to be sucked into the vortex of his strength once again.
It had been a long time since she’d dared let a man touch her, let a man make her feel vulnerable. And as out of place as it seemed, she had wanted him to touch her, to kiss her. With his hard eyes and soft lips, Jonas Shades would be the wrong place to start looking for easy companionship. There was nothing easy or companionable about him, especially in the lengthening shadows of the room.
Yes, the stony set of his face almost guaranteed she’d get emotionally bruised and battered in this relationship. And when he was through, there would be nothing left of her in the splintered remnants spit out of his twister.
But he would escape unscathed—as she suspected he always did.
“What did you want?” he asked, his voice filled with impatience. The clandestine light of dusk shifted around him, shielding the mirror of his eyes from her view.
“Nothing. I—I…” She didn’t know what to say. That was a first. Cathlynn O’Connell at a loss for words! She recoiled farther away, closer to the bathroom, closer to escape.
“It doesn’t matter.” He dismissed her stammer with a wave of his hand. “I needed to see you anyway. There are a few things we need to go over.”
He snapped on the overhead light, throwing garish light over the room, playing sharp black shadows against the gray stone walls. After clearing the clothes from the easy chair, he gestured for her to sit. “Come, we don’t have much time.”
She shook her head at his invitation and crossed her arms protectively over her chest. “What kind of things?” The chair would cage her, and she needed to feel free.
“Alana’s history.”
“Oh, yes. I suppose that would help.” A soft sigh of relief escaped her. Away from his formidable proximity, she regained her poise.
“I wish you’d sit,” he said.
“So you can tower over me? Forget it. I’ll stand.”
His eyebrows rose and he gave her an odd look. “Suit yourself.”
Jonas paced the room with studious purpose, pulling facts from the files of his mind. His hasty movements took him in and out of the shadows as if he belonged equally in the worlds of light and dark. Lover or murderer? She shook her head to dispel the grisly thought.
“Your name is Alana Chandler Shades,” Jonas said. “Your mother’s na—”
“My name is Cathlynn.” She couldn’t help it. Submitting meekly wasn’t her style. “I told you I can’t use hers.”
He stopped pacing and stood hands on hips. “Must you be so difficult? We don’t have time to waste.”
“Why, yes, I must.” She mimicked his voice, his movements, and felt a smile tug the corner of her mouth. Yes, this was better. Having Jonas unstrung and struggling for control was much better than the other way around. This she could handle.
“My wife’s name is Alana, how do you expect me to explain the discrepancy?”
“Use your imagination.”
He grumbled something about cursed luck under his breath and resumed his pacing, giving her a terse history of his life with Alana.
They’d met while he’d interned over summer vacation at the U.S. branch of Chandler Pharmaceuticals. Encouraged by Alana’s father, their attraction had grown swiftly; the summer had passed quickly. Promises had been made and honored a year later.
“Alana is British?”
“By birth. She was raised in Boston.”
Jonas’s voice faded and Cathlynn waited for him to continue. He’d recounted his story with factual dryness. Flat and cold like the air in the room. Were the memories too painful, or had deeper feelings never existed?
“What happened?” she prodded when he didn’t speak.
“We married. I finished my degree. I was offered a permanent research position with Chandler Pharmaceuticals.” He flicked on the bedside light as a distraction to the obvious pain flitting through his expressive eyes, making him human, vulnerable for a moment. The chiseled sternness returned swiftly, making her wonder if she’d been mistaken.
He stood silent by the window, offering her a view of his profile. The crisp creases in his winter-weight wool pants matched the furrowed lines on his face. Sadness or guilt? Unexpectedly, Cathlynn wanted to hold him and unburden him from his grief. But she didn’t move. Being a wife wasn’t part of the deal, only acting.
He stuck his hands in his pockets, tightening the fabric of his pants over his buttocks, and stared deep into the dark thickness of night. “Both were a mistake.”
A mistake? Curiosity had her longing to pursue that thread, but she sensed it would be a blunder.
“Is there anything else I should know?” she asked. Watching him stare blankly out the window made her uneasy because she didn’t know what to expect—from him; from her. “What about preferences—food, drink, activities, et cetera?”
For a moment she thought he wouldn’t answer, then he turned from the window and leaned his trim backside on the sill. “She liked everything expensive. Quality didn’t matter, only price. She drank a lot. To forget, she said. As for activities, I’d prefer you not emulate her in that department. I suggest you simply act naturally. Sterling’s bound to sense a forced performance.”
He glanced at his watch. “It’s time. Why don’t you run a brush through that mane of yours, and we’ll go down to dinner.” Flexing his thighs, he pushed himself off the sill.
“You’ll be all right?” he asked, giving her a queer little look that shivered all the way to her toes.
“I’ll be myself,” Cathlynn said. Her smile cracked her face despite an attempt to suppress it. As long as she fought him, she wouldn’t fall.
Being herself was no problem, but it might not quite meet Dr. Jonas Shades’s expectations.
THE DINING ROOM proved as formal and gloomy as the rest of the house. Wraithlike shadows played across the tall ceiling. Three multitiered crystal chandeliers hung evenly spaced over the table’s length. The long table could have seated twenty-four easily, but the crisp white linen cloth was set with only three places. The tall red and gold–upholstered chairs dwarfed their occupants. The heavy sideboard stood empty. Here again a series of solemn black-hooded monks stared at them from their gilt frames on the striped wallpaper, passing judgment, it seemed, at the affluence denied them in life.
All that’s missing is the cobwebs and the rattling of ghostly chains, Cathlynn thought as she sat in the chair Jonas held for her.
Valentin pushed a squeaky cart laden with silver-domed trays while Sterling regaled them with the woes of his transatlantic flight. His voice boomed with disquieting loudness in the cavernous room. “Can you imagine being stuck beside such a chap for all those hours?”
Cathlynn downed her chuckle with a sip of water. Her pity sided with Sterling’s unfortunate seatmate.
“Are you still afraid of flying, Alana?” Sterling asked, then tested the wine in his goblet.
“Please call me Cat—”
Jonas tapped her ankle under the table with his foot and glowered an icy warning at her. She stomped slyly on his toe with the heel of her shoe while she smiled graciously at Sterling. Jonas’s pinched lips told her she’d found her mark.
“That’s Jonas’s pet name for me, and I’ve grown rather fond of it over the years.”
She snatched a roll from the bread basket, tore off a piece and slipped easily into her role. She had to play it well; her dream was at stake, not only Jonas’s. But playing it Jonas’s way wouldn’t work, and as much as he scared her with his frosty charm and tempestuous eyes, she had nothing to fear until he held the trust—then she’d be gone before she could suffer his wrath.
“If I’d gotten over my fear of flying,” Cathlynn continued, “I’d surely have flown to England to visit you. I’d forgotten what an interesting person you are. But there’s just something about trusting your life to a shell of metal thirty thousand feet above the ground.” She scrunched her shoulders and feigned a shiver.
“It’s really quite safe, you know.” Sterling picked at the plate Valentin placed in front of him, removing the orange sauce from the chicken breast with the side of his fork. “Tell me, dear boy, is that butler of yours the only servant you’ve got left? I rang the service bell for half an hour before I got an answer.”
Jonas sawed his meat. His jaw twitched once before he answered. “Times have been hard lately. We do the best we can.”
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