Dare to Dream: Life as One Direction

I was 14 when I first tried out for The X Factor. I had become really bored with running and although I was on the reserve list for the 2012 Olympics, I wanted to find something I could do apart from run. When I told my mates I was going in for The X Factor we had a bit of banter because they thought it was quite funny, but they were also supportive.

The only thing I really wanted to do was see Simon Cowell, and I waited nine hours in a queue to get that chance, but it was definitely worth it. I felt quite grown-up at the time and like I was capable of handling everything that came with being on the show. But looking back now at all we’ve been through, there is no way I could have handled it. No way at all.

It was horrible to be turned away at Judges’ Houses, but if I had made the live shows I wouldn’t have known what had hit me. JLS and Alexandra Burke were in that year and I would have been gone straight away.

It was hard going back to school having done The X Factor because I got a real taste for performing on a big stage and all I wanted to do from that moment on was be a pop star. My schoolwork suffered quite a bit, to be honest, and I remember my head of year talking to me about my grades and things. I remember him saying, ‘Your grades are slipping. What if your voice breaks and you can’t sing any more? What will you do then? You won’t have any qualifications to fall back on.’

That really hit me and I started working a lot harder from then on and I ended up getting one A* in PE, as well as two Bs, six Cs and a D. The school wanted me to carry on and do A-levels, but I went to music college instead. At least I did get decent grades in the end, though.

Going away for a few years after I first tried out for The X Factor and doing gigs was the best thing I could have done. I worked with producers and writers but I never signed any deals, just in case I ever wanted to try out for The X Factor again. If I hadn’t made it I was going to do an apprenticeship with my dad, which seemed quite exciting to me, but first he wanted me to give the singing all I had.

My dad works in a factory building planes, and in my mind I was going to be playing with giant Lego or something, but it’s actually really hard work. My other back-up plan was to become a fireman. But then, when I was 16, I decided to give singing and The X Factor another go.

THE NEXT STEP

Trying out for The X Factor for a second time was really nerve-wracking because now I wanted it more than ever. Some friends and family members were even a bit worried about me going for it, in case I got let down again, but I knew I had to try, whatever happened. I desperately wanted to get a yes from Simon and prove how much I’d come on since the last time I was on the show. I’d grown up so much since I was last there.

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