Her Baby's First Christmas

CHAPTER TWO

“MICHAEL says you’re as trustworthy as the three wise men.”

“Great. Let’s go.” Jared grabbed her suitcase, cooler and diaper bag and led her to the bench where he’d left the baby carrier. She laid Molly inside, but he didn’t even pause. He walked outside without her. She finished settling Molly, exited the bus terminal and saw him standing at the SUV, stashing her belongings in the rear compartment.

At his car, she opened the back door to install the baby carrier and Jared was suddenly at her side. “Here, let me.”

He reached for the seat belt at the same time Elise did. Their shoulders brushed then their arms, and then their fingers. A jolt of electricity sizzled through Elise. She froze, but so did Jared. He turned his head slightly to the right, catching her gaze with his serious gray eyes.

She didn’t even react. Jared was a very handsome, sexy guy. Of course, she was attracted to him. But she wasn’t going to do anything about it. And neither was he. She might be more “his type” than he let on, but he clearly didn’t want anything to do with her. And that was much, much better for two people about to spend several days in each other’s company, than giving in to a meaningless attraction.

She held his gaze blandly, as if what they’d felt meant nothing. His steely-gray eyes probed hers for another second or two then he turned away. Her breath streamed out of her lungs in a quiet swoosh of relief.

Once Molly was strapped in, Jared slammed the door, pulled open the passenger door for Elise and rounded the hood. As he slid behind the steering wheel, Elise buckled her seat belt. He started the car, and without a word they began their trip.

It didn’t take long to get onto a highway. California was riddled with them. But when he turned onto Route 5 north, Elise frowned.

“Why aren’t we going east?”

“Five takes us to Route 80, which will take me the entire way to New York City. If I’m remembering correctly you can ride with me as far as Pennsylvania and get a bus south.”

“Okay.” She didn’t know a lot about the road systems, but it seemed he did. “Sounds great.”

With the directions out of the way and Molly happily occupied in the backseat, the only sound in the SUV was the faint thwap of the windshield wipers. Jared shifted on his seat as if as uneasy as she was. But she didn’t think he was antsy because of the silence. A man who never even said hello while standing with her waiting for the elevator was probably more afraid that she would talk than she wouldn’t. So she said nothing, respecting his right to keep to himself.

They drove about twenty miles before the rain slowed to a drizzle. Jared flicked a switch and the low thwap, thwap, thwap of the wiper blades slowed, too, making the quiet in the car even more pronounced. Molly woke the second the sound changed, as if the comforting rhythm had soothed her and, without it, she couldn’t sleep.

Hearing her stir, Elise twisted on the seat to face her daughter. Though Molly was lying facing the back of the SUV, a mirror not only caught her reflection, but it also caught Elise’s for the baby. Molly glanced around as if disoriented, then screamed like a banshee.

“Hey, Molly. Hey, baby,” Elise crooned. “See. Your mama’s here. There’s no reason to cry.”

Molly stretched out her little arms to Elise’s reflection in the mirror, her cries echoing through the vehicle.

“We’re going to have to stop to feed her.”

“Stop?”

“Just pull to the side of the road. It only takes her five minutes to eat.”

He sighed. “Right.” But he pulled off the road.

He pulled off the road and, not wanting to annoy him or waste any time, she raced to the back of the SUV, got a bottle from the cooler, retrieved Molly from the car seat and quickly fed her, then burped her. Normally she would have spent a few extra minutes playing with her and talking to her, but wanting to keep the peace, she put Molly back into her seat, stowed the bottle in the little cooler and returned to the passenger side.

Jared immediately got them back on the road. “So how often does she need feeding?”

Elise winced. “Every three or four hours.”

“Do I have to watch the clock?”

Elise laughed. “No. Molly will remind us when she’s hungry.”

Jared didn’t reply. The song that had been playing softly in the background from the radio he’d turned on while she fed Molly suddenly became static as if they’d driven out of range of the station.

“I’ll find another channel.”

“Great.”

Elise set the dial for a country station, but rather than the twang of a country song, the joyful strains of Christmas carols filled the car. Jared reached down, pressed a button and soft rock poured from the speakers.

No surprise there. She’d already figured out he didn’t like Christmas.

He had lots of money but wasn’t happy, and he didn’t want to go home for Christmas but he had to. There was so much more to this man than met the eye, but Elise had no intention of probing. She had her own troubles to deal with. Getting to North Carolina three days sooner meant she’d get to Four Corners three days sooner. And she had no idea what kind of reception she’d get.

Had her grandmother ever mentioned her to people? Did anyone even know she existed? And why did her grandmother leave her the house when her father should have been the one to inherit it?

For all she knew her father could have had a falling out with his mother and she could be walking into the aftermath of that. Plus, he could have other children. She could have half brothers and sisters. Some might even live in Four Corners. Once they heard who inherited their grandmother’s property, they might also be angry about her being the one to get the farm.

Of course, they might welcome her into the family.

She squeezed her eyes shut. Hoping for that was just wrong. Not because it wasn’t in the realm of possibility, but because if she let herself believe it, she could end up hurt. And she’d had enough hurt in her life. Her dad had left. Her mom had died the summer after Elise graduated from high school. Patrick hadn’t wanted her. Or their baby.

So, no. She couldn’t handle any more disappointment and she wouldn’t hope for things that were at best wishful thinking.

She drew a breath, tried to shake off the fantasy that she might have family who wanted her, but it wouldn’t go away. She saw holiday celebrations in her head, gifts to buy and get from people who loved her, and maybe even Christmas morning at a home filled with love and laughter.

Of course, she could also spend Christmas morning listening to somebody scream at her that she didn’t deserve their grandmother’s land.

Hating her thoughts, she squelched a sigh. She’d managed not to think about any of this for the past month. But the silent car provided too much opportunity for her mind to feed her fears and her fantasies.

“How long do you think this trip will take?”

Jared flexed his hands on the steering wheel. “If I drive fast it’s four days. Normal speed it’s five.”

Four or five days until she faced her future. Maybe even her father. Maybe even a family.

Her stomach quaked. It seemed too soon. Yet four days was also a bit too long to sit in a silent car bouncing between fear and wishes.

At noon, Jared’s stomach growled and he took an exit ramp off the highway, suggesting they eat lunch. They ate an uneventful hamburger and fries in a fast food restaurant, and then got back on the road. Molly fell asleep almost instantly and Jared let the country music channel Elise had found fill the silent air.

At six o’clock, stiff from driving, he turned to Elise. “What do you say we stop for the night?”

She glanced up at the highway sign. “This is it? This is all the farther we’re going? We’re not even out of Nevada.”

Ignoring her protest, he said, “Watch the road signs. We’ll take the exit with the first hotel.”

“But it’s only six o’clock.”

“And my back is stiff.”

“I can drive.”

He peered at her. “Are you kidding? Do you think I’d give you my keys so you could forget to give them back and then drive away in the middle of the night with my SUV?”

She sighed. “You can’t be that distrustful.”

He turned his attention to the road again. “I know you’re eager to get home so I promise we’ll make better time tomorrow.”

She said, “Okay,” but Jared heard something odd in her voice and decided it was disappointment. Though he tried not to, he remembered times he had been eager to get home. He drew a breath, banishing the memories of homemade cookies sprinkled with sugar that MacKenzie had dyed red and green to make it more festive. Of welcome home kisses at the apartment door. Of cuddling together to stay warm in bed because the superintendent turned down the heat at night.

“There. Look.” Elise’s voice brought him out of his thoughts. “There’s a hotel just off this exit.”

He maneuvered the big SUV down the ramp. When they reached the hotel, he drove under the portico, shut off his engine and jumped out of the car. Elise climbed out, too. She immediately opened the back door and freed Molly.

“Hey, kid,” Jared said as Elise walked up to him.

Molly sniffed and snuggled into her mother’s shoulder.

“She’s not quite awake enough to remember you,” Elise explained.

“I’m not offended.”

Jared made his reservation first, so he could take both Molly and the diaper bag from Elise. She opened her purse and pulled out a wallet and though Jared wasn’t one to be nosy, he couldn’t help noticing that she didn’t seem to have a lot of cash. Telling himself she probably had a bank card and a few large bills, rather than several smaller bills, he walked away, cooing to Molly who sniffled as if she wanted to cry.

“How much is it for a night… exactly?”

Hearing Elise’s question, Jared paced a bit farther away from the hotel desk. He remembered that same tone in Mackenzie’s voice when she asked the superintendent how much the rent was for their first apartment. Jared had been about to ask, but she beat him to it. She fancied herself their money manager. The memory of how bad she was with finances made him laugh, and then pinched his chest with wrenching pain.

He immediately pushed those thoughts aside, diverting his attention to Elise for the distraction. But remembering how embarrassing it was to need to know to the exact penny how much something cost, he took a few more steps away. Even then he heard her asking for the cheapest room and groaning when the desk clerk told her that all the rooms were priced the same. A price that was obviously too high for her.

Jared wanted to kick himself for not considering cost when he chose a place to stop for the night, but he also couldn’t go over and tell her that they could drive some more until they found a less expensive place. That would only embarrass her more. He considered paying for her hotel room, but knew she wouldn’t accept that, either. The woman was a walking pillar of pride. She clearly didn’t like taking help.

But her situation reminded him so much of himself and MacKenzie at the beginning of their marriage that he couldn’t simply ignore her. He hadn’t minded doing without, but he’d hated that MacKenzie had spent the last years of her life gazing longingly through storefront windows at things she couldn’t have. And Elise was a new mom. No new mom should be broke. If Jared knew the name of the man who had deserted her with a baby, he’d kick the guy’s behind.

But he couldn’t. He didn’t even know if the guy had left Elise or if it had been her decision not to tell her baby’s father she was pregnant. For all he knew, Elise might have never even told Molly’s dad he was a father. She was an independent thing—

He stopped his thoughts. None of this was any of his business.

Key card in hand, she approached him with a smile, pretending everything was fine. “All set.”

He pretended, too. “All set.”

She reached for Molly, but he said, “I’m okay with Molly. We’ll get you settled in your room first, and then I’ll take my stuff to my room and park the car.”

At the SUV he gave her the baby so he could take her suitcase, diaper bag and cooler. “What’s in this?”

“Her milk, some juice, some baby cereal. I have crackers and cookies in my suitcase for me. So if you get hungry or feel like a cookie, I have some.”

He again thought of MacKenzie’s red and green sugar-covered cookies and the deep breath he took shivered in his lungs. But his voice was calm when he said, “I’m not much of a cookie guy anymore.”

“Okay. But just in case.”

Knowing she needed the assurance that he didn’t think himself too good for her things, he nodded, and then followed her to her room, watching as she inserted the key and opened the door all without causing Molly to stir.

She walked in, looking around as if she’d never seen a hotel room before. “Wow! This is a great room.”

He glanced at the room. At best it was adequate.

“I can see why it cost so much.”

And the price, while not low, certainly wasn’t high.

But—as he’d already reminded himself—Elise and her finances were none of his business. He handed Molly to Elise and headed for the door. “Good night.”

“Good night, Jared.”

But when he reached the door, she said, “And Jared?”

He paused, facing her again.

“Thanks. I know you’re delaying your trip to New York for your own reasons, but giving us a ride saved me a lot of headaches. I really appreciate it.”

Something inside Jared stirred. It wasn’t the first time anyone had thanked him in the past five years, but this was the first time being thanked had made him feel good. He’d fallen so far into a black pit of despair that work had become his only motivation to get up some mornings. He would lose himself in the sometimes ridiculous trials and tribulations of his wealthy clients so he didn’t have to deal with his own life. He’d forgotten how good it felt to help someone.

MacKenzie would be so ashamed of him.

Some days he was ashamed of himself. But he supposed that was what happened when life threw a man a curve like the one thrown to him. He hadn’t lost his ability to function. He’d lost his ability to feel. Or maybe he’d lost his humanity. Yet, here it was, staring him in the face. And for the first time in five years, being himself didn’t hurt.

“You’re welcome.”

Elise was already at breakfast when Jared arrived in the lobby the next morning. His gray raincoat, creased trousers and dress shirt of the day before had been replaced by jeans, a T-shirt and a leather jacket. He looked younger and more relaxed. So handsome she wasn’t surprised when the hotel desk clerk gave him a quick once-over or that her own heart stuttered in her chest at the mere sight of him.

As he approached the little table where she and Molly sat sharing a bowl of hot cereal, her nerves tingled with the attraction she’d felt the day before when they’d accidentally brushed hands. She once again reminded herself that being attracted wasn’t in either of their best interest but this time it didn’t work. How could she not be attracted to him? Incredibly male in his jeans and leather jacket, he took her breath away. If they accidentally touched again, she knew she’d shiver.

Still, she didn’t let any of that show as she offered him the empty seat at her small table. To her surprise, he not only took it; he actually made baby talk with Molly as he ate. Luckily, when they got into the SUV, he didn’t talk anymore, except to suggest they stop for lunch when Molly awakened after sleeping away the morning.

Back in the car after their quick lunch, he once again stayed silent until Molly awakened from her afternoon nap and they stopped for dinner.

They traveled another two hours after supper. Then it began to rain again and Jared suggested Elise look for a hotel. She found one almost immediately, but when she wrapped fingers around the handle to open her door, Jared grabbed her forearm.

“Before we go in, let’s have a chat.”

The unexpected touch of his fingers on her skin sizzled through her. Then his serious tone penetrated, and the heat evaporated.

“Chat” was the word her mom had used when she sat Elise down to explain that her father had left them. When Elise finally found Patrick after he hadn’t come home from his supposed job search, he had also said it was time for a chat. His “chat” revolved around the fact that he hadn’t loved her for some time and included his complete horror at becoming a daddy. Then he’d kicked her out of the apartment of his new girlfriend and in what felt like seconds she was suddenly on her own. Alone and pregnant.

“Chatting” never worked out well for her.

“Why do we need to chat?”

He drew a long breath. “I know you don’t have a lot of money and I do, so why don’t we let this trip be totally on me?”

Relief flooded her that he wasn’t angry, but when she realized what he was asking, her blood went cold. “I don’t need your charity.”

“I know that. But I’d like you to think of me paying for the hotel room as something like a Christmas gift.”

She laughed. “You wouldn’t have bought me a Christmas gift if we were still back at Clover Valley. So, no.”

“Why won’t you just accept my help?”

“Because I don’t need it.” Because she didn’t want to become indebted, or worse dependent. Any time she relied on anyone, especially a man, he let her down. She didn’t want to add another name to the list.

“Michael paid me very well to house-sit. For the past six months I didn’t have rent or utilities. So I saved most of that money. Just because I’m frugal doesn’t mean I’m broke.”

She pushed out of the SUV before he could argue and immediately gasped. The air was freezing! The wind howled and the rain that pricked her felt like ice. A Southern California girl who had been raised in North Carolina, she wasn’t accustomed to temperatures this low, or wind this cruel.

She scurried to the back of the SUV to gather her things, but Jared was already there.

“You grab Molly and go ahead in.” He pointed at the hotel doors. “I’ll be right behind you.”

Elise grabbed Molly and ran into the lobby. As he had promised, Jared was right behind her, carrying her diaper bag, suitcase and cooler and his own duffel. Wind followed them inside and he had to put down the baggage to close the door.

“Wow.”

“Yeah, wow,” Jared agreed, but his gaze was on the line at the check-in desk. “Seems like the weather caused everybody on the road to stop. We better get a place in line before all the rooms are gone.” He slid the diaper bag and her suitcase straps to her shoulders. “Take these and go sit.” He nodded at the sofa and chair arranged by a fireplace. “I’ll check us both in.”

She caught his arm. “Don’t pay for my room.”

“I’ll use my credit card to check you in. Then tomorrow you can pay for your room however you want.”

She had expected him to argue. When he didn’t, she was impressed that he respected her and her wishes. She relaxed a bit. “Okay.”

“I still think you’re crazy not to take my help.”

“Whatever.”

The first customer finished and everybody moved forward. Another clerk stepped out from a door behind the desk and called the next customer in the line. Guests were checked in quickly and soon it was Jared’s turn.

Preoccupied with entertaining Molly, Elise didn’t pay much attention until she heard Jared say, “Are you kidding?”

She looked over. She had a sneaking suspicion that the prices had risen sharply because of supply and demand in the storm.

She walked up to the desk. Jared said to the clerk, “Tell her what you just told me.”

The young man smiled ruefully. “I’m sorry, miss, but we have only one room left.”

Because that wasn’t what she expected to hear, Elise blinked.

Jared sighed. “Tell her the rest.”

The clerk winced. “It has only one bed.”

This time, Elise’s mouth fell open. “Are you kidding?”

“Tell her the other thing.”

The clerk winced again. “We’re the last hotel for fifty miles. That’s why we booked up so quickly.”

Elise stood, openmouthed, processing that. Finally she shook her head and said, “We don’t have a choice.”

“Looks that way.”

The repentant clerk said, “Sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” Elise said, smiling at him, though she wanted to groan in misery. Riding in the silent car wasn’t exactly torture, but it wasn’t pleasant, either. She’d been looking forward to being in her own room with Molly for a few hours to simply relax. Worse, she was more attracted to Jared than she cared to admit. There’d be no downtime to remind herself that these physical feelings meant nothing. No time to remind herself that men usually spelled trouble. Especially men she depended on. And like it or not, she was depending on Jared for a ride.

One bed meant they’d either sleep together awkwardly, stiff and fearful all night that they might accidentally touch, or they’d have to flip a coin with the loser sleeping on the floor. But that wasn’t the clerk’s fault or Jared’s.

Smiling at the clerk again, she said, “Can we have a crib for the room?”

The clerk typed a bit, probably checking availability, and then breathed a sigh of relief. “There’s one left.”

“One’s all we need.” She faced Jared again. “You get the key. I’ll gather my things.”

Jared nodded.

As Elise walked away, Molly cooed happily.

“Yeah. You’re going to love this because you’ll drink a bottle and fall asleep in a nice comfy crib that you don’t have to share with a stranger. Things aren’t so simple for adults.”

Molly giggled. Elise rolled her eyes as she reached down for her diaper bag, suitcase and cooler. She didn’t think Jared would make a pass at her or even flirt with her. He also wouldn’t be so disrespectful as to come out of the bathroom wrapped only in a towel or to sleep naked. She wasn’t worried that something big would happen. Little things would be the problem. Close quarters would multiply their awareness of each other and that would make the night long and uncomfortable.

Jared walked over to the seating arrangement and took the bags from her. “We’re just around the corner. I’ll go with you and Molly to the room, open the door and then go back and park the SUV.”

He looked so nervous that Elise smiled reassuringly. “Thanks.”

He motioned her to precede him out the door. Elise stepped out into the cold again, tucking Molly’s blanket tightly around her as they ran to the door of the hotel room. Jared let them in, deposited her things in the closet and left quickly.

When he was gone, Elise got a fresh bottle for Molly and sat on the bed. Spending the night in the same room was going to be too awkward for words. But right now her baby needed to be fed, so she occupied herself with feeding Molly, cooing to her as she suckled, putting her fears behind her until she actually had to face them.

When Molly was done eating, Jared opened the door. He walked his duffel bag to the closet and tossed it beside her suitcase. The intimacy of their things sitting together sent nerves thrumming through Elise. She swallowed.

“Do you and Molly need the bathroom first?”

He turned as he asked the question, and Elise’s eyes made an involuntary sweep of his body. Strong thighs encased in his jeans. Tight tummy beneath a T-shirt. Broad shoulders.

A shiver of feminine longing raced through her.

Lord, why had she done that?

She redirected her gaze and her attention to Molly’s diaper bag and began rifling through it for a clean diaper and pajamas. “That would be a good idea. That way I can put her to sleep while you’re showering.”

He frowned. “I know I’m new at this whole baby thing, but what do you do with her while you’re showering?”