“I don’t want to do it again,” he pleaded, crying quietly into her shoulder.
Nina was tempted to lie but knew that would shake his faith in her. “I can’t promise you that.”
“If you do have to do it again, it’ll be easier the next time,” Alex said confidently. “You’ll know what to expect.”
Tommy stopped crying and lifted his head from his mother’s shoulder to look at the man. “It was really loud.”
“But the noise can’t hurt you,” Alex replied.
Tommy drew in a long breath, then asked, “Can I have pepperoni on my pizza?”
“Sure,” Alex said, startled by the child’s sudden change in subject. Then he recalled some proud parent he’d been cornered by at a party talking about how a child’s mind could jump from one thing to another. Clearly the boy had decided to forget the machine and concentrate on a more pleasant subject.
“Pete likes plain cheese,” Elizabeth spoke up.
“And what do you like?” Alex asked, looking her way.
She shrugged. “I don’t know. Hamburger, I guess.”
Alex turned to Nina with a questioning look. “What about you?”
“Anything but onions and green peppers,” she replied, amazed by how calm his words had made Tommy. She was certain that if she’d said the same thing, her son would still be sobbing on her shoulder. She frowned. It had to be one of those male bonding kind of things…if a man says it, then it must be true.
“I’ll be back soon,” Alex promised, heading for the door.
Watching him stride out, Nina wondered if he was having second thoughts. That he’d chosen to go get the pizzas, instead of having them delivered, suggested he wanted to escape. Her children had behaved well. Both Elizabeth and Pete seemed to sense Tommy’s trauma acutely and were more subdued than usual. But they had stared, and a crying child usually made most men nervous. She half expected him to send the pizzas back with a messenger and a note saying some important business concern had come up. However, in the event that he did return, she needed to make the atmosphere a little more comfortable. “Mr. Bennett is a friend. He’s going to be around a lot for a while, so I don’t want you staring at him as if he has an eye in the middle of his forehead.”
“Is he a boyfriend?” Elizabeth asked.
Nina bit back an emphatic no. “He’s a friend,” she said firmly, hating to lie to the children. She doubted that she and Alex Bennett would ever be anything other than passing acquaintances. But she’d agreed to this charade for Tommy’s sake, and for him, she’d see it through. Wanting to end this discussion, she headed into the kitchen to get the plates.
Alex used his car phone to call his favorite Italian restaurant and order an assortment of pizzas. He added some ravioli and pasta to the order, as well. Seeing a bakery ahead, he stopped and bought a cake. At a quick-stop shop he purchased sodas.
He had expected to feel relieved to be out of that apartment with its bevy of children. Instead, he was anxious to return with his gathered goodies. Must be that Good Samaritan syndrome or maybe some primitive instinct that being the male, it makes me feel good to be bringing dinner home to someone, he mused sarcastically.
A little later, when Nina opened the door for him, her eyes rounded in surprise. “You got takeout from Fredrico’s?”
Her amazement pleased him. Carrying the boxes of hot food inside, he paused only long enough to put them on the table, then headed back to the door. “There’s a few more things in the car,” he said over his shoulder.
Nina began to frown as she opened the containers. He’d bought enough for days, and knowing the prices Fredrico’s charged, she guessed he’d spent nearly as much on this one meal as she budgeted for food for a month.
When he entered carrying the bakery box and a case of sodas, her pride again bubbled to the surface. She followed him into the kitchen, closing the door behind her. “We’re not a charity case,” she said in lowered tones so that her children would not hear. “You don’t have to feel you have to feed us as if we haven’t eaten in days. I have managed to keep food on the table.”
Alex scowled. “That wasn’t why I bought all of this. I thought you deserved a treat. You’ve obviously been through a rough time lately. And to be honest, I have no idea how much children eat.” He thought of the woman he’d met the night of the storm. That she had disappeared so completely bothered him. “I was hoping to make you smile. As I recall, you have a very nice smile.”
Nina drew a harsh breath. She’d overreacted. She should consider him Tommy’s guardian angel; instead, she seemed to be trying to find fault in everything he did. “I’m sorry. My pride can get a little out of hand at times.” She smiled a crooked, embarrassed smile. “Thank you. This was very kind.”
Alex glimpsed the woman from the night of the storm and smiled back, hoping to encourage her to emerge further. “You’re welcome.”
Nina’s smile stiffened. She knew now why she’d been so guarded with Alex Bennett. She was afraid of him. When he turned on his charm, he stirred emotions within her she didn’t want to feel toward him. They would only lead to trouble.
Seeing the woman from the storm disappearing again behind shuttered eyes, Alex frowned. “I get the feeling you’re fighting very hard not to like me.”
“I don’t dislike you. I just don’t see us remaining friends after this arrangement is over. You’ll go back to being a guest at parties, and I’ll go back to being one of the serving people. I figure it’s best if we both remember our places and stay in them.”
Alex had never thought of himself as a snob, and he didn’t like the picture she painted of him as one. “You’re overly class conscious.”
“I’m realistic. Just wait and see.”
What he saw was that her resolve was firm. He’d already determined that keeping a distance between them was the right thing to do, he reminded himself. “Have it your way,” he said without further argument.
“Mom, when can we eat?” Elizabeth called from the other side of the door.
“Right now,” Nina replied, exiting the kitchen. She waved the children toward the table. “You can all sit down, and Mr. Bennett can help you get what you want while I get the drinks.”
“Alex,” he corrected her. Then, in lowered tones for her ears only, he added, “My grandfather is never going to believe you’re my fiancée if you keep addressing me as Mr. Bennett.”
“Alex,” she conceded, fighting to ignore the erotic effect his warm breath on her neck was having on her senses.
Ordering himself to forget how much he’d wanted to nip her earlobe, Alex joined the children at the table. Pete was reaching for a slice of pizza, and he quickly helped the child get it onto his plate. Immediately the boy began to eat, ignoring all the others.
“My mother says you’re a friend,” Elizabeth said, regarding him speculatively as he dished her up a slice of pizza and some ravioli.
“That’s right,” he acknowledged, marveling at how much more intense a child’s gaze could be than an adult’s.
“Are you going to ask her on a date?” Elizabeth persisted.
“As a matter of fact, I consider this our first one,” he replied, wondering if the girl was going to object.
Elizabeth smiled with satisfaction. “Grandma will be happy to know Mommy is dating. Our dad’s been in heaven a long time. Pete doesn’t even remember him. He was only one. I don’t remember him real well, but Grandma says I take after him. He had blue eyes and blond hair, too.”
Alex realized she didn’t expect any response, as she abruptly stopped talking and turned her full attention to her food. Children, he mused. They simply say what’s on their minds, then move on to other topics. No small talk for them. Turning his attention to Tommy, he saw the boy sitting, his chin propped in his hands. “How about a piece of pepperoni pizza,” he offered, putting one on the boy’s plate.
Tommy forced a tired smile but continued to remain leaning into his hands. Concern for the boy flowed through Alex. “You need to eat,” he said.
“In a minute,” Tommy replied.
Nina brought in the drinks, and Alex saw the worried look on her face when she saw her eldest son staring lethargically at the food he’d been looking forward to having. “Try to eat a little,” she encouraged.
Tommy picked up the slice and began to nibble at it.
Concern for the boy foremost on his mind, Alex joined her in coaxing Tommy to eat. By the time the meal was over, he thought he’d never had so exhausting an experience.
After a couple of bites, Tommy had turned pale and looked as if he was going to be sick. Nina had carried him to the couch and laid him down. Alex’s worry that the boy was in much more immediate danger than the doctor had led them to believe increased.
Pete, clearly having inherited his mother’s bold independence, wanted to serve himself. The others had all tried to keep an eye on him, so that when he suddenly stood in his chair and made an attempt to reach something outside of his grasp, they were there to help. But none had been quick enough when he made a grab for another slice of pizza and spilled his soda.
Although Elizabeth was polite and ladylike at all times, Alex felt her watching him. He’d been sized-up by some very powerful men in his time and many a calculating female. None of those inspections unnerved him the way the little blonde’s did.
Helping Nina clear the table, he wondered how she’d had the energy to care for three children and hold down a job. It was a heavy load for such a delicate set of shoulders, he thought admiringly. He’d considered leaving soon after the meal. But the tiredness and the strain on her face brought out a protectiveness in him. He would stay awhile longer and help with the children, he decided.
Putting the leftovers in the refrigerator, Nina was sure Alex Bennett had had enough of her and her children. He’d never relaxed, but remained tensely alert in order to aid Pete, especially after the spilled soda episode. And Elizabeth hadn’t been able to keep her eyes off of the man. Knowing that a child’s nearly constant stare would make anyone uneasy, Nina had cast her daughter several reproving glances and Elizabeth had tried to behave herself. But, Nina had to admit, Alex Bennett was the kind of man any female would be drawn to study. She, herself, had found her gaze wandering to him several times, but she quickly jerked it away. Then there had been Tommy’s bout of threatened nausea.
Nina was used to active mealtimes and her children watching her, especially when they were anxious. But she was certain Alex was accustomed to a more sedate dining atmosphere with much more comfortable companions. Returning to the living room, she found him on the floor helping Pete build while Elizabeth introduced him to her dolls. She expected him to rise, make a polite excuse about business he needed to take care of and leave. Instead, he ruffled Pete’s hair playfully and added another block to the tower they were constructing.
Her jaw firmed. Even if he wasn’t tired of them, his presence was wearing her down. She needed some time alone with her children to absorb the impact of the events of the day. But politeness kept her from ordering him out. After all, he had provided dinner. She’d give him another fifteen minutes. If he wasn’t ready to leave by then, she’d politely but firmly send him packing. Seating herself in a nearby chair, she gave in to fatigue, leaned her head back and closed her eyes.
It seemed only moments had passed when a strong hand, gently shaking her shoulder, woke her.
Alex hated disturbing her sleep. She’d looked so peaceful. But he knew the children wouldn’t allow him to tuck them in, and he was ready for them to go to bed. Their company had been interesting but tiring. Both Elizabeth and Pete had vied for his attention, and he’d tried to give it equally. Tommy had continued to study him warily, and he’d sensed that all three were trying to decide if it was all right to like him. The effect put a strain on his nerves different from any he’d experienced in a long time. It was, he thought dryly, a lot like his first day in school when he wasn’t certain where he would fit in or if he would fit in at all. “Elizabeth tells me that it’s Pete’s bedtime,” he said when she opened her eyes.
Nina glanced at the clock. She’d been asleep for nearly two hours. “I’m so sorry,” she apologized, her cheeks reddening with embarrassment.
She was cute when she was flustered, Alex noted. “You obviously needed the rest.”
She saw a softness in his eyes that sent a curl of warmth through her. He’s way out of your league, she chided herself, and jerked her gaze to her children. “Time for baths,” she announced, rising and picking up Pete.
For the next hour, she washed backs, read stories and tucked all three kids into bed. Returning to the living room, she found Alex reading the newspaper. “I would have thought that you’d had enough of me and my family for one day,” she said, as surprised to find him there as she was by how at home he looked in her living room.
He laid aside the paper. While she’d been away, he’d had a stern talk with himself. He couldn’t deny he was physically attracted to her, but he vowed to keep the attraction under control. Having spent the evening in her home, not only was he more certain than ever that she would want more of a commitment than he wanted to give, but he wasn’t ready to take on the role of father to three children he hadn’t even sired. Not that they weren’t nice kids, he just wasn’t in the market for a ready-made family. Ignoring the curve of her hips, he kept his mind on business. “We don’t have much time to get to know each other.”
She noted that the warmth she’d seen earlier in his eyes was gone, and his cool, calculating tone let her know there was nothing personal in his inquiry. A few second thoughts about the reality of getting physically or emotionally involved with a woman with three children have obviously dampened any ardor he was experiencing, she thought cynically. It was just as well, she added. She would never be a wealthy man’s playmate, and that was all he would ever offer her. “What do you want to know?”
“Elizabeth filled me in on her age and those of her brothers. From that I figured out you’ve been widowed approximately three years.”
“Yes,” she replied when he paused, clearly expecting a response.
“You mentioned that your parents are deceased.”
Realizing that this twenty-questions game could go on forever unless she began to elaborate, Nina said, “My father had a small one-man, one-plane charter service. When I was sixteen, he and my mother were flying to Las Vegas for a short vacation. The plane got caught in a storm and crashed. My father’s mother was widowed and lived here. I didn’t want to leave Grand Springs, so she took me in. She died five years ago. My only close living relatives are my maternal grandparents. They live in a retirement community in Florida. We write but rarely see one another. Tom was my high school sweetheart. After my parents’ deaths we became even closer. As soon as I graduated from high school, we married. He worked with his father as a mechanic at a local garage. A drunk driver caused the accident that killed him.”
Tom’s image came strongly into her mind. Too tired to keep her emotions under control, tears welled in her eyes. “I thought he’d always be here. I let myself rely on him too much.”
She’s still in love with him, Alex noted. That explained why she’d fled when he’d started to kiss her. And another very good reason not to get involved with her, he added. Only a fool would compete with a ghost. “What kind of music do you like?”
She pushed Tom from her mind and ordered herself to concentrate on the business at hand. “All kinds. Country, mostly.”
“Movies?”
“I haven’t seen any in years. I don’t know.” Her nerves wearing thin, she frowned at him. “Do you really think your grandfather is going to grill you so closely about me?”
Alex had to admit he’d only continued to question her out of curiosity. He already knew enough to satisfy his grandfather. And curiosity did kill the cat. “You’re right. I know all I need to know.”
Her tiredness suddenly lessened as she realized that it was her turn to ask questions. “What about you? I’ll need to know something.”
“My father died before I was born. My mother preferred the jet-setting life to motherhood. As soon as I was born, she left me in my grandfather’s care and took off to lead her own life. She married several times. I lost track. About five years ago she drowned in the Mediterranean. I didn’t know her. I was raised by my grandfather and Matilda Hastings. Matilda was hired as my nanny and has remained as my grandfather’s housekeeper.”
Nina found herself picturing him as a lonely child. “I’m sorry about your parents.”
Alex shrugged. “My grandfather gave me all the attention any child could want. And Matilda was as protective as a mother hen. I figure I didn’t miss much.” But even as he made this declaration, a deep-rooted anger stirred within, and he scowled. He didn’t normally allow his mother’s desertion to awaken emotion. Long ago, he’d vowed to remain as indifferent to her as she had been to him. He glanced at his watch. “I think we both need to get some rest,” he said, rising. “I’ll come by and pick you up in time for your appointment tomorrow.”
“I need to drop the children off at their grandparents’ house. I’ll meet you at the doctor’s office,” she countered, then gave him directions.
He nodded and, bidding her good night, left.
As the door closed behind him, Nina frowned thoughtfully. If Alex Bennett had been truthful, and she had no reason to doubt him, he’d been loved and well cared for. But she’d seen the flash of anger in his eyes and knew his mother’s desertion had bothered him. “At least I know one subject to avoid,” she muttered, and headed into the bathroom to take a long, hot shower.
* * *
Alex’s knuckles whitened around the receiver of the phone as he fought to keep his temper in check. Soon after arriving back at his mountain retreat, he’d called his grandfather’s house to tell Matilda to expect him, Nina and Tommy. He’d also told her about the boy’s need for surgery. He would decide after he saw what condition his grandfather was in if it was necessary to tell the old man about the seriousness of the boy’s condition. “No need in causing him any grief in his last days,” he’d said.
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