The Rancher's Heir
Noah shook his head. “Thanks, Camilla, but I have other places to go.”
Why did his words hurt? He was stiff, cold and angry. She didn’t want to react to him, to ache to be in his arms and to remember far too vividly his kisses.
“Do I get my present?” she asked.
He crossed the room and she couldn’t resist letting her gaze flick over him. Her pulse raced as she noted differences. He stopped a couple of feet in front of her. Her gaze lowered to his mouth and she couldn’t get her breath. She realized how she stared and her gaze flew up to meet his, and for a few seconds, she saw scalding desire, a hungry look that made her weak in the knees. She was the one who broke up with him, so why was she about to go up in flames just facing him now?
She fought to regain her composure, or at least feign it. Searching for something to say, she came up with a lame comment. “I think you’re taller, Noah.”
“I am,” he answered. “I got measured enough in the Army to know I’m taller than when I went in. Taller, heavier, stronger and hopefully tougher. We’ll see the next time I participate in a rodeo.” He reached out, holding a package. “Here’s your present from Thane, Camilla. He had very specific instructions for me.”
Momentarily lost in thoughts about her brother, she accepted the small package and ran her hand over the ripped and wrinkled brown paper, tied tightly with twine. She thought about Thane, dying in Afghanistan, so far from home and family, having a present for her and one for Ethan. “Thank you. I’m glad you and Mike and Jake were with him. He died doing what he wanted,” she said and stopped talking for a moment because tears threatened. “When I kissed him goodbye, I wondered if I would ever see him again,” she whispered and turned her back to wipe her eyes. She tried to get her emotions under control and shifted her thoughts to Noah and the present, turning back to face him.
“Sorry, Noah. Thane was really special.”
“Yes, he was. He was special to all of us under his command.”
She took a deep breath. “You did what he wanted. I’ll tell Ethan, when he’s old enough to understand that Thane very specifically wanted you to bring his present home and he wanted you to place it in Ethan’s hands yourself.”
“And that’s what I intend to do. I’ll have to come back,” he said, and she could hear the reluctance in his voice.
A chill slithered down her spine because she knew Noah would do whatever he said he would. She knew far too well how tough and unyielding he could be when he thought he was right.
“Noah, you’re busy. I’m busy. Ethan is a baby and Thane wasn’t thinking about how little Ethan is.”
“Camilla,” Noah said in such a cold voice that she stopped talking instantly. “Thane knew exactly what he was doing and saying. Those were the words of a dying man giving his last wishes. I promise you, your brother’s thoughts were clear, and with great effort and some of his last breaths, he made me promise to put that gift into your baby’s hands. He specifically said to not give it to you.”
She felt heat rise in her face. She loved her brother, but he had always meddled in her life. This was why she wouldn’t tie her life to a man who was an alpha male through and through. Her controlling brother had even managed to wring promises from his men that would bring about the results Thane wanted. He was just as bad as her father.
Her father had never been deeply interested in his kids. Early on, Thane took over being a second dad to her and sometimes he’d interfered in her life if he’d thought it was best.
She smiled sweetly. “All right, Noah. You can give the present to Ethan personally. I’ll call you. It won’t be this week because we have commitments, but next week should work.”
Noah nodded. “If possible, as soon as you can. I want to get this done. I gave your brother my word that I would.”
“Sure. You want to get back to your ranch, don’t you?”
“You can’t imagine how much I want to. It’s been two years since I even saw it, back when I was on that furlough. You should have come out there with me at least once, Camilla. It’s beautiful.”
She shivered. “Noah, I’ve told you—we used to go see my grandparents on their ranch and it was never beautiful. It was scary and had snakes. I was bitten once, but it wasn’t a poisonous one. My grandfather spent his time and money gambling and that ranch was insignificant to him. So were his grandkids. I hated it, and after my grandmother died, my grandfather let everything go. The house was dark and depressing. I told you—that’s where my little brother, Winston, drowned. Our grandfather let us play on a frozen pond and the ice cracked. We all went in and that icy water was terrifying and I had nightmares about it for a couple of years. Thane pulled Winston out. He was only four. He got pneumonia and died. I’ve told you before.”
“Yeah, I’ve heard Thane talk about it. That doesn’t mean all ranches are dark, dangerous, gloomy and sad. That was your grandfather’s doing.”
“I’ll agree with you on that one.”
A faint smile raised one corner of his mouth. “Something we finally agree on.”
“I’ve lost two brothers and an uncle because of accidents or violence. At least you can take care of yourself. When we were dating, maybe I should have gone to your ranch with you and you should have gone to an opera with me.”
“I can’t recall being invited to an opera.”
“You would have turned me down.”
Again, she saw a faint, crooked smile. “You should have tried me, Camilla. You’ll never know whether I would have or wouldn’t have.”
They looked at each other and she felt that same pull, the attraction that was as intense as it had been when they dated. He had the most vivid blue eyes she had ever seen and they held her captive right now while her heart pounded. She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t look away and couldn’t move.
“I’ll see you next week,” he said gruffly. But as his gaze lingered on her for a minute after he spoke, longing swamped her. She could just reach out and pull him back into her life. That thought came and immediately she stepped away from him. He might not ever want to be in her life again and she didn’t want him back. He hadn’t changed; he’d still try to run everything. Just like Thane. She knew Thane had been trying to get them together again or he would never have sent a present for Ethan and asked Noah to place it in Ethan’s hands.
“I’ll call you before I come out,” Noah added, still standing in the same spot and looking at her.
Just as she’d expected, he turned the tables on her, taking charge of their next meeting. “Please do call. My schedule varies from week to week. I have a painting I’m working on.”
“I’ll call. You look great, Camilla,” he said and his voice suddenly had a rasp that made her pulse jump. His gaze ran briefly over her from head to toe and back to look into her eyes. He might as well have run his fingers over her. She tingled from his glance—a mere glance—and she reacted to him.
“Thank you. So do you,” she said in a voice that was almost a whisper.
“I don’t know why in hell you fell in love with me when you knew from day one the things I like and do, the kind of man I am,” he said. His eyes blazed with anger and a muscle worked in his jaw.
Her temper flared over his comment and she leaned closer to him, as she breathed deeply and looked at his mouth. “Oh, I think you know full well why I fell in love with you,” she said, reacting with anger and longing. Her emotions were raw and she hurt and was angry with him, while at the same time, she couldn’t stop wanting him, his kisses and his arms around her.
Annoyed with Noah and herself, she slipped her arm around his neck, standing on tiptoe to kiss him, running her tongue slowly over his lips for seconds before his mouth opened on hers. His arm banded her waist tightly, yanking her against him, and he leaned over her, kissing her, thrusting his tongue over hers. It was a hot, demanding kiss that made her heart pound while she moaned with pleasure and forgot momentarily all their differences.
Abruptly he swung her up and released her. Both of them gasped for breath as they stared at each other. “Well, I knew there had to be some reason you liked me. That one hasn’t changed. It’s a package deal—it’s all of me, the bossy male, the rancher, the cowboy and rodeo rider, the pilot.” He glared at her and her heart still pounded. “I should go,” he said.
He turned and left, walking toward his black sports car. She watched as he walked away with purpose, standing straight, looking like a soldier, someone who was accustomed to walking with shoulders back and chin up.
“The truth is, you don’t want to change,” she said softly, knowing he was out of earshot and couldn’t possibly hear her. “You’re not going to see Ethan,” she whispered. “Not next week or next month or next year. Thane was meddling in my life, doing what he thought was best because he loved both of us, but it wasn’t best for any of us—not for me, not for you and not for Ethan.”
Her conscience hurt when she remembered Thane’s call to her, the heated arguments between them—something she’d never had before in her life—and now her brother was gone and she wanted to say she was sorry she had argued with him. She wasn’t sorry for what she had done and was still doing, but she was sorry she had fought with the brother she loved so much.
She had told him that she had rights and he was butting into something that was none of his business and could hurt three people.
He had told her what she was doing was wrong and Noah had legal rights that she was violating. Thane had said she should rethink what she was doing before she hurt three people badly.
She thought about Noah and whispered to him even though he had driven away. “You can keep Thane’s present to Ethan. It won’t be half as important as keeping you from giving it to him. If the day ever comes when you see Ethan, the moment you do, you’ll know you’re looking at your son. And if that happens, all hell will break loose between us, Noah Grant.”
Three
Noah
As Noah drove away, he took deep breaths and relaxed his grip on the steering wheel. It had hurt far more than he had expected to see Camilla again. He thought he was getting over her, but the minute she opened the door, he knew damn well he hadn’t gotten over her at all. He had just been busy trying to stay alive and do his job.
While he hurt, he wished he didn’t care. He and Camilla had no future together and he didn’t want to see her again because today had torn him up. She hadn’t looked happy, either.
She had been prettier than ever, looking gorgeous, and his knee-jerk reaction had been to want to wrap her in his arms and kiss her for the next hour and carry her to bed.
He couldn’t ever do that again.
He struck the steering wheel with his hand. He needed to get to the ranch and outside where he had hard, physical work. The Army was over. His life with Camilla was over. He had to move on and get a new life and try to forget her.
He hadn’t helped himself by asking her why she fell in love with him when he knew what she liked and they both were tense and angry. Her kisses made him want to promise to change, to do whatever she wanted, but he hung on to his wits enough to know that he couldn’t stop being decisive, controlling, demanding. He loved the Bar G Ranch and didn’t want to give up that life. He’d lived in Dallas and worked in the family business and he’d had more of that than he wanted. That wasn’t the life for him.
He drove carefully because he was upset and his mind was elsewhere. It was not until he was in his own condo that he could let go, let the memories that tugged at him come, the regrets, the anger, the longing he couldn’t control.
He brewed coffee, poured a mug and went out on his balcony to look over the city of Dallas. He was high enough up that the horns and clatter of trucks were muffled.
He sat and sipped his coffee and thought about what else he had to do before he went back to the ranch, yet every few minutes, his thoughts would return to Camilla. He had to let go because they would not get back together. The differences were too big, too basic. She felt he was too strong an alpha male, making decisions and taking charge, because she had grown up with two take-charge males—Thane and her dad. She said her mother had given in to her dad always. Noah felt certain that wouldn’t happen with Camilla. She was about as strong-willed as he was if she stopped to think about it. Would she really have liked him better if he couldn’t take charge, couldn’t make decisions and act on them? He didn’t think so.
She hated her grandfather’s ranch, thus she disliked all ranches. He knew her memories were terrible at her grandfather’s place because her little brother had caught pneumonia from his fall into an icy pond and had later died. That would be a bad memory, but Noah didn’t think his ranch would trigger any such memories. He should have tried more to coax her out to his ranch.
She loved life in the city. He loved it out on his ranch, which she had never even visited. They weren’t going to work through their differences because neither of them would change. In bed was the one place where they had absolutely no disagreements. She was fantastic, instantly and intensely responsive. He sipped his coffee and made an effort to get his thoughts off sex with Camilla. The big deal was to give Camilla’s baby his little present. Why the hell Thane had been so insistent on placing that present in his little nephew’s hands, Noah couldn’t imagine, unless it had been that the little kid had no dad and Thane hoped Noah would be enough interested in the child to try to work things out with Camilla.
Noah had always wondered if she’d married on the rebound because it had been so fast, coming up right after he had been home on furlough and they had gone another—and final—round in their battle over his alpha-male, take-charge way, their city versus country life.
A part of him suspected that Thane wanted them back together and thought her fatherless child might draw them closer. That wasn’t going to happen. Noah knew Camilla hadn’t changed. She didn’t want any part of him in her life.
He sipped his hot coffee, closing his eyes, lost in memories of holding and kissing her that he couldn’t push out of mind. She was still the sexiest woman he had ever known. She dazzled him, and until he’d left for the Army, they’d had fun together. He had been staying in Dallas some of the time, or coming in from the ranch often to take her out, and for a time, they seemed to be getting closer. Until he started inviting her to his ranch.
Give the baby his present and tell her goodbye. After that and Mike’s wedding, there won’t be any other reason to try to see her.
His logical mind gave him clear commands, but he couldn’t stop the memories that clutched at his heart. Memories of one of the last times they were together, when he invited her to his ranch and she turned him down, leading to an argument as he tried to talk her into coming for a weekend. Finally he had stepped closer to slip his arms around her.
“Here’s where all our arguments vanish,” he’d said quietly. His mouth had covered hers and his tongue had gone deep while he kissed her. He’d held her close against him with one arm, his other hand slipping lightly over her curves, sliding down over her trim bottom, and then he’d shifted, his hand drifting beneath her dress to caress her breast. She’d been soft, wonderful, sweet-smelling, absolute temptation. He’d been lost. Her softness had made him shake.
For a moment she’d stood still in his arms, but with a moan, her arms had circled his neck and she’d thrust her hips against him, clinging tightly to him as she kissed him passionately in return, and he hadn’t wanted to ever stop.
He’d leaned over her, pouring himself into the kiss as if he could kiss away her reluctance and make her want a life together. Make being with him more important to her than her dislike of country life and her views on alpha males. Their moments of intimacy were the best possible, but it always came back to the truth: he couldn’t change the kind of man he was and make false promises that he never could keep and he didn’t want to give up his ranch. City life wasn’t for him.
Shifting, he’d slipped his hand beneath her dress, caressing her silken thighs so lightly, hearing her moan as she moved against him. Then he’d forgotten all their harsh words and impossible goals as he leaned down again to kiss her.
“I want you, Camilla,” he’d whispered minutes later, running his hand lightly over her nape and then holding her close.
She’d inhaled, closing her eyes to kiss him in return. She’d moaned softly and run both hands down his sides. “Noah, this isn’t going to solve anything.”
“Shh. For a few minutes shut out the world. We’ll talk about it later.”
“That just means you’re going to do what you wa—”
He’d kissed her so she would stop talking and there were no arguments. The sex had been hot, irresistible, and he’d picked her up to carry her to bed, where they forgot their differences.
Hours later, he’d slipped out of bed, gathering his clothes to shower and dress. When he’d come out, she’d been waiting. She had showered, pulled on jeans and a blue T-shirt.
They’d faced each other in silence. “We didn’t solve one thing. You just took charge and swept us into making love.”
“It looks as if we’re caught up in irreconcilable differences because I can’t stop being an alpha male. And frankly, I don’t want to give up living on my ranch. That’s my life.”
“And I don’t want to leave the city life. Noah, why are we even arguing? You haven’t proposed. We’re not that deeply involved.”
“One of us was,” he’d said. “All right, Camilla. I guess we say goodbye. I’m going to the military, anyway. I won’t be around for a few years.”
She’d flinched and drawn a deep breath. “We’re just opposites and neither one of us wants to change.”
“I guess you’re right. One goodbye kiss,” he’d said, kissing her again, knowing he had lost her. Hurting, getting aroused again, he’d held her tightly and they’d kissed.
He’d released her abruptly and stepped back, clenching his fists so he wouldn’t pick her up and carry her to bed. “This is goodbye. It’s what you want. Not what I want. You’re very special, Camilla. I am who I am and I guess you can say the same about yourself. You fuss about your brother being an alpha male, as well as your dad, but that didn’t stop you from loving Thane and turning to him when you had a problem. Aw, hell. There’s too much about me you don’t like—too much you love that I don’t want any part of, like living in the city and working here. I’m here now more than I want to be so I can take you out. Well, that’s over. I’m going into the Army and I’ll be gone. We just said goodbye.”
Tears had spilled over and run down her cheeks, but her frown had kept him from closing the space between them to take her into his arms.
“You’re right, Noah. I don’t want to live on a ranch or in the country. You’re a strong man and you’ll always want life your way.”
When he’d started to reply, she’d held up her hand as if to stop him. “I know what you’re about to say—that I have a strong, take-charge tendency myself. Maybe so. We’re opposites in too many ways. All we have that goes smoothly is sex. That’s breathtaking. But there’s more to life than that. We have to get out of bed, and from the moment we do, we’re opposites. So I guess it is goodbye,” she’d said, wiping her eyes.
“You know how I feel about you, but I have to be honest and I have to be me.”
He’d turned and walked out of her condo, knowing it was the end of their relationship and wondering how long it would take him to end his feelings for her.
The memory faded, but instead of feeling like three years ago, the pain of that breakup and goodbye was fresh. His feelings for her hadn’t ended as he had thought they would when he was on active duty. He’d thought he was getting over her and then one glimpse of her set him back. There was one ray of hope for getting past the hurt from their breakup—he had done far better when he was away from her.
As soon as he delivered her baby’s present and was in Mike Moretti’s wedding, he would rarely ever see her. Thane was gone now, so his friendship with her brother could no longer throw them together. He planned to stay in Dallas for several weeks to be close to his dad. He would have to come and go from the ranch and spend more time in the city than he had originally expected.
There hadn’t been a beautiful, fun, sexy woman in his life since he went into the Army. If he found one, maybe he could move on completely and the hurt over Camilla would lessen and disappear.
Convincing himself that life would improve, he tried to focus on the things he needed to get done while he was in Dallas. He needed to go see his dad. After that, he wanted to go by the family’s commercial real-estate business. The company headquarters of Grant Realty was in downtown Dallas, which was run by Ben, and they had two suburban offices covering the metropolitan area of Dallas and Fort Worth, Eli running one of those and Stefanie managing the other.
And he also needed to deal with Thane’s final wishes. Camilla ought to have her baby home and available for him to visit early next week. Before that, Noah would see her in Mike’s wedding because he would be a groomsman and he knew she would be one of the bridesmaids, and then Camilla would be out of his life. They would be finished and he could say goodbye and, hopefully, forget her.
* * *
The next morning when Noah stopped at the back of the house, his parents were sitting in big rocking chairs on the veranda. He joined them and sat talking, taking his time and enjoying the morning, seeing his folks and gazing at their yard filled with flowers, a lily pond with a waterfall and fountains. He knew that around the corner on the east side of the house, there was another large veranda with an outdoor living room and kitchen. Beyond it was a sparkling swimming pool with more waterfalls and fountains.
“Let’s go to my office,” his dad said, and Noah nodded, strolling slowly beside his dad through the hall to the large home office. Cal Grant entered and crossed the room to sit in the big leather recliner he’d had for years. Noah turned to close the door and then sat in a hard, wooden rocking chair.
“I remember when your feet didn’t touch the floor when you’d sit in that chair,” his dad said, smiling at him.
“Yeah. I remember sitting here getting lectures about my behavior,” Noah replied, and his dad chuckled.
“They must have done some good. You turned out to be a good man.”
Noah looked into his dad’s eyes. “Ben told me about your heart attacks and your bypass surgery, Dad. I wish I could do something.”
“This came sooner than I thought something would, but I’m doing okay. I walk on a treadmill some, try to eat right. I feel okay.”
“That’s good news. I’m just sorry about what you’ve been through and that I wasn’t here.”
“You were doing a service for me and for all of us. Your mother is in a dither over this, so the less said around her the better. I feel better now that you’re home. That’s good.”
“It’s good to be home.”
“You’ll be going to your ranch soon.”
He nodded. “I have Mike Moretti’s wedding to Vivian Warner coming up and I’ll be around here for a while after that. We’ll get to see each other.”
“Noah, you faced that you might not return when you enlisted. With old age, it’s a given. We have trusts set up, the business is taken care of and I’m out of it. I’ve had a really good life. Financially, there shouldn’t be any problem or even responsibility for your mom. Harvey’s been our accountant for years and he’ll handle things. If something happens to me, just give her your love and attention the way you always have. Take care of Mom and try to not grieve. I’ve had a good life.”
“There’s no way in hell anyone can avoid grief. Not when you love someone,” Noah replied, not wanting to even contemplate losing his father. Surprisingly, another thought entered his mind. Camilla. He wondered if he was going to miss her for the rest of his life, too.