His Holiday Heart

“Really? And here I thought you would be in a hurry to get rid of me.” She said it with a smile, with understanding, as if she thought she knew why he always kept his distance.

She knew nothing. Nothing at all. All it took was one glance into her unguarded green eyes and his Adam’s apple stuck in his throat and wouldn’t budge. Emeralds would be considered dull and worthless when compared to that deep, stunning green. He couldn’t speak. He couldn’t swallow. He was lucky to breathe, which meant he was staring at her like a fool as she gave a little shoulder shrug.

“Spence, I’m not going to let you drive on unplowed roads the state patrol is about ready to close down anyway. I’ll be fine here. Look, there’s a vacancy sign. It’s a nice place.”

He tore his gaze from hers and stared at the stately hotel sign. Any second now the effects of Lucy would wear off and he would be able to speak again like a normal man. “What if the power goes off?”

“They probably have a generator.”

“What about dinner? Have you had dinner?”

“Uh, no. There’s a restaurant next door, oh, that’s closed. No surprise there. Don’t worry. I’m sure there’s room service in a place like this.” Kindly, she laid her gloved fingertips on his forearm. “Thanks for your concern, but I’ll be fine. You can leave with a clear conscience. Really.”

“Maybe I don’t want a clear conscience.” Even through the layers of down of his sleeve, he could feel the weight of her fingertips, the impact of her touch. It was like a mortar blast against the shields of his heart.

Wasn’t that just his luck? She was the only woman who had ever made a dent in his defenses. A smart man would trust a grown woman to take care of herself, drop her off and drive away. But he’d never been a smart man. Doing the right thing wasn’t always smart. He didn’t like the idea of Lucy being alone in a hotel room when a blizzard hit the city. Sometimes electricity and services were running by the next day. Sometimes it took much longer. She didn’t even have a change of clothes with her.

“Wait.” He reached to turn on the radio and scanned for a road report. He found one of the local stations and listened. They were in the middle of listing all the county road closures. He thought of his brother-in-law, Jack, who would probably be called out on patrol tonight. The storm had come in fast, to everyone’s surprise.

He could feel Lucy’s gaze on him. His palms broke out in a sweat. There was that panic again, settling in because she was too close. Only the console separated them, but it wasn’t only physical distance. He’d stopped barking at her and started caring, and he wasn’t even sure when he’d allowed that to happen.

Maybe it was inevitable. He’d been watching Lucy from afar for a long, long time.

“I have three options,” he told her, down to business and determined to stay there. That way he didn’t have to notice how honest her eyes were. “One, we call my brother-in-law with the state patrol.”

“Katherine’s husband, Jack?”

“Yep. If he’s not out on an emergency, he can probably take you home.”

“I’d hate to trouble him. Someone might need him more than I do.”

Sincerity. It made her seem flawless and even more beautiful. He swallowed hard, wiped his palms on his knees and stared at the hotel’s sign again. “Option two: we take you over to stay with Rebecca. She’s in a two-bedroom condo with a spare guest room. She’s not far from here, and I’m sure she’ll be glad to have you.”

“Then I’m inconveniencing her.”

“Lucy, you’ll be inconveniencing me worse if you stay here. Hotels are fine, but tomorrow is Thanksgiving. What about your family? Here’s your third option: I take you home. I’ve got four-wheel drive, and I’m not scared of a little snow.”

“So I see. Actually, I’m surprised snow doesn’t melt at your command.”

“Actually, me too.”

“Spence, I can’t believe this. You’re actually almost smiling.”

“I’ve been known to smile.”

“Not that I’ve ever seen. Sure, in theory of course you are capable of smiling, but not even I could imagine it.” Were they having a moment together, Lucy wondered. Were they really getting along? “I’m guessing that you even have dimples.”

“Shh, don’t go around saying things like that. A man like me can’t have dimples. That will ruin my reputation.”

“Oh, so that’s the secret to Spence McKaslin. The growling personality is all for the sake of your reputation.” Lucy rolled her eyes. Men. “Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me.”

“Thanks. I appreciate that. Word like that gets out and I’ll lose all respect.”

“I don’t think you have to worry about that.” Lucy felt a little flip-flop of her heart, and that surprised her. Okay, maybe it was because she’d never seen this side of Spence before, but what she did know about him certainly made him a man to admire. He was devout and devoted to his family. He was active in his church and did extensive volunteer work. That meant he couldn’t be a bad guy, right?

He hauled his cell phone from his coat pocket and punched a number. “I’ll check with Rebecca first. Do you have family here in town that can pick you up tomorrow?”

Now was the moment of truth. “I don’t have family in town.”

“Oh, they’re flying in?”

It was an assumption she should correct, but when she opened her mouth, she hesitated. Saying the words “No I’ll be alone for the holiday” was hard. She had to gather up her gumption and just as she was opening her mouth to correct his misimpression, Rebecca must have answered her phone, because Spence started talking. Lucy could personally come up with a thousand excuses why Rebecca—she knew her from church and the bookstore, of course—wouldn’t want to have her privacy invaded, but Spence snapped off the phone.

“It’s settled.” He didn’t look at her as he put the truck in gear. “Rebecca is more than happy to have you. She got so excited I couldn’t get a word in edgewise. If you have no objections, I’ll take you there.”

She thought of how difficult and dangerous the county roads were and then of Spence fighting them back to town. She looked up at the hotel, very nice but so impersonal—so lonely. “My cat will miss me, but I always leave plenty of food out for her. If I don’t, she gets huffy.”

Spence frowned, staring intently at the hotel sign. “I’ll take that as a yes. Do you mind if I stop by the grocery store? I was going to grab a bite to eat on the way home, but most places are closed.”

“Sure, let’s stop. That way I can pick up a few things, too.” Shopping with Spence. How could that be fun? She tried to picture him doing something as ordinary as pushing a grocery cart—and she could as long as she imagined a frown on his face.

The traffic report droned on, filling the silence between them. Spence was absorbed in negotiating the slick streets. Snow fell harder with each passing minute so that by the time they climbed out of the truck three blocks away, she sank into snow up to her knees. And to think it had been sunny with blue skies only this morning.

She crunched in beside Spence, who stopped to make sure she didn’t fall on the shoveled walkway in front of the automatic doors. The rock salt was having a hard time keeping up with the gathering ice. Once inside, Spence separated a cart from the others with a snap of his wrist and, with a commanding walk, took off in the direction of the bakery.

“Due to bacterial formation, you should always buy from the meat department last,” he told her.

Yes, this was pretty much as she imagined it. She wasn’t surprised when he hauled a list out of his pocket and, with a glance, headed off for the bread aisle.

She, being much less serious, lingered by the boxes of donuts. They didn’t have the powdered sugar kind, so she chose a package of blueberry muffins with powdered sugar tops.

“Give them to me.” He held out his hand.

“Don’t tell me how bad these are for me,” she warned him with a smile as she clutched her muffins.

“They aren’t steel cut oatmeal, that’s for sure.” He took the package and set it in one corner of his cart, far away from his whole grain, extremely healthy kind of bread. “The next aisle over is coffee and tea.”

“Oh, and hot chocolate.” She led the way. The moment she turned the corner, she spotted Marin Baylor, youth pastor from the church, debating over two boxes of tea.

“Lucy.” She looked up with a welcoming smile. That smile slid from her face like snow off a tin roof when she gazed over Lucy’s shoulder. “Spence?”

Marin sounded a little shocked to see them in the same store together. It was the together part that was so shocking, apparently. “My car got plowed under. Spence is rescuing me.”

“That’s mighty Christian of him.” Marin nodded thoughtfully. “Spence, did you get my message about Project Santa? I’m sure I’m on your callback list, but since we’re face-to-face—”

“Yes, I meant to call you. The week got away from me.” Now that he was speaking with Marin, the tension eased from Spence’s jaw and broad shoulders.

He really is a handsome man, Lucy thought as she watched him reach into his other pocket and pull out a small notebook. He thumbed through it, pulled a pen out and made a note or two. It was church business, and she didn’t want to interrupt or listen in, so she let her mind wander.

When exactly had he started avoiding her? She studied the man who looked so good in his black winter coat, trousers and black boots. He was in good shape; he probably was one of those admirable individuals who worked out and ate wisely all the time.

But what was attractive to her about Spence wasn’t his physical appearance. It was how he stood soldier straight and full of honor. It was the respectful way he talked to women. It was the kindness he showed to small children. She’d seen him with his niece and nephew when they were in the store or at church. Why was a great man like him still not married? Aside from the distant and difficult personality.

“Well,” Marin said. “I’ve got to get going. They’re forecasting another six to eight inches before midnight. You two drive safe. See you on Sunday.”

Lucy had time to say goodbye and give Marin a wave before the pastor was off, hauling out her cell phone. Spence, judging by the scowl building on his face, had noticed, too. Lucy feared the ramifications. “Do you think she’ll tell Katherine?”

Spence shook his head. “This spells trouble for me, but I’m used to trouble. It’s hard not to be with so many sisters. You must have siblings, too.”

“One sister, but she and I are worlds apart.”

“Some days I think I’m on earth and my sisters are on Pluto, but I don’t think that’s what you mean.”

Who knew Spence McKaslin could quip? Lucy started down the aisle, wondering what other surprises might come her way. Spence always seemed so, well, grim. Maybe he was an interesting and potentially funny guy. “I’m the only Christian in my family. It annoys my mother to no end, who treats me as if I’ve been sucked into oblivion by a giant sea squid.”

“Is that a roundabout way of saying she does her best not to talk to you?”

“Yep. My dad pretty much follows her lead. He’s a pharmacist and somehow uses that as his reason why there can’t be a God. Anyway, I’m not exactly banned, but if I announce that I’m coming home, there’s this long silence and a polite, well, how nice. I’m sure we can make room for you.” And exactly why was she telling him this? She didn’t tell anyone this. Embarrassed when he didn’t say anything, she turned the corner and headed down the milk and eggs aisle. She grabbed a carton.

He came up beside her and took one, too. “What about Thanksgiving? They’re not flying in?”

“No.” Now he probably thought she was someone who allowed deception. Her chest bunched up, making it hard to breathe. “I don’t like to actually explain this to people.”

“You mean to someone you don’t especially like?”

“To someone I don’t especially know,” she said and wondered at the wince on his face—not a scowl. Spence might not be as grim and as emotionless as she’d always thought. “It’s painful, and so I just try not to have to talk about it. You have a wonderful family. Your sisters adore you. You have the perfect parents. You are very blessed, Spence.”

He shook his head. “Maybe you don’t know that Dorrie isn’t my real mother.”

“No.” She didn’t know the family well, only Katherine. “I guess I just assumed.”

“Nothing can hurt like family,” he said quietly.

For a nanosecond, she heard something else in his voice and then in his silence, but he broke away and headed toward the packaged shredded cheeses. She went to grab a box of butter quarters, and the span of distance was between them again—not just a physical one but one far more significant.

It was hard to see much of anything through the amazing downpour of thick, continuous, wind-driven snow, but the condominium complex looked new and snazzy. Shrouded trees and bushes lined plentiful sidewalks and walkways. Long stretches of white hinted at lush spacious lawns hidden beneath.

A front light flashed on, illuminating a snow-covered walkway and porch. Lucy unlatched her seat belt. This was it, where she and Spence parted company. At least the uncomfortable silence would be over, but that didn’t make her feel any happier.

“I’ll walk you in.” Spence pulled the e-brake and turned off the ignition. Without the engine noise, the howl of wind and the ping of snowflakes sounded loud in the silence. He cleared his throat, looking pained that she was still in his company. “I picked up a few things for Rebecca at the store.”

That was surprising. He said it casually, as if he did favors every day. Spence McKaslin was definitely a surprise. She grabbed her bag by the straps and heaved it off the floor. “Did you go shopping for anyone else?”

“Katherine needed a few things. I’ll drop her stuff by on my way home. I don’t live too far from her.”

She had never given much thought to where Spence lived—in a cave, a townhouse, a tidy home in a cul-de-sac? She couldn’t picture him anywhere. Spence McKaslin was more than a surprise, he was a genuine mystery and the opposite of what she expected. “If you live near Katherine, does that mean down the street? In the same subdivision?”

“Three streets down, five blocks over.”

A homeowner, then. She still couldn’t picture it. She was glad he hadn’t insisted on taking her all the way home. The fifteen miles out of town and then all the way back across town would have taxed her conversational skills. Spence was not an easy man to chat with. “Thanks for this. You could have left me to freeze beside my car.”

“Sure, but then I would have had to deal with all my sisters. They would have been very mad at me.” He almost smiled again.

Yep, there was a hint of dimples, just as she’d imagined. Their gazes met, and it was like a spark from a live wire against her soul. What she saw in that brief moment was Spence’s heart—good and noble and lonely.

Lonely was something she knew a lot about.

“There’s Rebecca.” Spence gave a nod in the direction of the condo and yanked open his door.

Bitter cold and bulleting snow filled the passenger compartment. Through the haze of snow coating the glass, she could see Spence’s hulking shadow cut around the front of the truck. She reached for the door handle, but then the door was already opening. Spence stood with his hand out, gloves on, to help her down.

“Careful, its slick.” That’s all he said and tersely, as if she were annoying him.

She remembered the glimpse she’d seen of him. The hint of a smile, the niceness. She didn’t take his gruff tone seriously as she placed her hand in his and launched off the truck’s high seat. She landed knee-deep in snow, nearly blown over by the gusting wind, but Spence steadied her. He was solid and reliable, refusing to let her fall.

A haze of the porch light winked like a lighthouse’s beacon on a far shore. Spence yanked his hand from hers and turned his back to gather the groceries from the backseat. He took hers, too, and walked alongside her so as to block the worst of the storm.

“Quick! Before you two freeze.” Rebecca held the door open more widely.

Since she was already about to become a snow woman in two more seconds, Lucy gladly tumbled through the doorway and into the warm condo. Spence was on her heels, groceries in the crook of his arm. The door slammed shut. The arctic blast of the wind died. The last of the snow tumbled to the entry rug, and Lucy breathed a sigh of relief. A hot current of air blew at her ankles. Blessed warmth.

“Lucy, this is going to be so much fun.” Rebecca took one of the grocery sacks from her brother. “I’ve got the fire going in the living room. The guest bed is made up with the electric blanket on high. I’ve got a pot of lemon tea steeping to warm you up. Spence, come this way and put that heavy sack on the kitchen counter.”

Spence glowered. “I’ve got to hit the road. More stops to make before I get home.”

Lucy struggled with her zipper, watching him through her lashes. The way he said it, no one would guess that he had groceries to deliver and family to check on. Or that he did so gladly. “Thanks again, Spence. You are my lifesaver.”

“Next time pay better attention to the weather reports.” He marched past her dripping snow on the carpet and disappeared into another room.

He said it as if she had majorly inconvenienced him. But she had this suspicion that wasn’t the truth at all. What was Spence’s truth? she wondered as she shucked off her coat and let Rebecca hook it over the back of a nearby chair. Spence was definitely a man of mystery.

He marched straight out of the shadows as if he were a part of it. He nodded to her once as he passed straight to the door. “Rebecca, let me know if you need anything else. I bought an extra flashlight and a pack of batteries, just in case.”

“Oh, I didn’t think about the lights going out.”

He nodded as if he wasn’t surprised by that comment and grabbed the door. The spill of overhead light shone on him just right—or maybe it was her imagination—but for one brief moment his harshness lifted, his gaze found hers and there was that vulnerable heart of his. It was simple to see his loving concern for his baby sister and his protective nature, and more.

Yes, she saw much more. Like a flash of concern for her, too. He was glad that she was safe from the hazards of the storm.

“Good night, Lucy,” he said quietly, not harshly at all. He opened the door, the storm claimed him and he was out of her sight.

But not out of her thoughts.

Chapter Three

Between the heat from the fireplace and the comfort of the electric throw she was wrapped up in, Lucy was blissful. Add to that the pair of comfy sweats and warm fuzzy socks Rebecca had lent her, and she never wanted to move.

“That was Katherine on the phone.” Rebecca swept into the living room with a tray of drinks and two plates of goodies from the grocery sacks. “She said Marin called her a while ago and said she had an interesting experience in the grocery store. I’m sorry, but she knows about you and Spence now.”

“You say that as if there is something more at work than his stalwart Christian duty.”

“There could be. Katherine couldn’t remember the last time Spence gave a woman who wasn’t family a ride, let alone went grocery shopping with one. He tends to keep his distance.”

“Tends to keep his distance? Now that’s an understatement if I’ve ever heard one.”

“He’s a pro at it. If it was an event at the Olympics, he would be a gold medal winner. For the last decade. Maybe longer.” Rebecca curled up on the opposite couch and stole a chocolate-covered marshmallow cookie from the tray. “It’s just his personality. He’s been that way as long as I can remember. He’s the nicest guy beneath all the frowning.”

“I’m beginning to notice that.” Since she had a terrible weakness for those cookies, she had to take one and ignore the fact that she was supposed to be counting calories. “I get the feeling he doesn’t want anyone to know the real Spence McKaslin.”

“So, does this mean you like him?”

“Me?” Should the fact that she dropped the cookie mean anything? She hoped not. She snatched it up, hoping that her fingers were shaking because they had been so cold only a little bit ago—and for no other reason. “Please don’t read too much into this. Spence told me the only reason he was helping me was because he didn’t want all his sisters angry at him if he left me there to freeze into an icicle.”

“Uh-huh.” Rebecca looked like she didn’t believe it not even a tiny bit.

Maybe it was the perfect time to change the subject. “How is Katherine doing? I haven’t had a chance to talk to her this week.”

“Well, don’t you think it’s time we fixed that? Come to Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow, and you can see for yourself.”

Was that a twinkle of mischief in Rebecca’s eyes or just a trick of the light? Lucy wasn’t sure, but she did know one thing. “I can’t go barging in on a family holiday. No way.”

“Well, Spence told Katherine who told me that you don’t have any family in the area.”

“Did he? So this is his idea?” Her heart gave a lurch. She had no clue if that was a good sign or a very bad one.

“Oh, no. This invitation comes from Katherine. We’re having dinner at her house this year. Besides, our family has grown so huge with everyone getting married that you won’t be barging in at all. We’ll hardly notice you in the crowd. C’mon, say yes. Please?” She polished off the last of the cookie in one big bite.

Lucy did the same. Maybe it was all that yummy chocolate and processed sugar, but she felt warm and wonderful and optimistic. What could go wrong? She could have a little turkey, have a chance to talk with some of her favorite people—Katherine and Danielle. With any luck, Ava would bring dessert—she owned the best bakery in town. It was all win-win and had nothing at all—nothing whatsoever—to do with the fact that Spence would be there, too. She didn’t want to see the man of mystery again. Really.

“Sure,” she said, reaching for another cookie. Yes, she was feeling exceptionally optimistic. “Why not?”

“Great. Everyone will be thrilled you’re coming.” Rebecca spoke around a bite of cookie. “Even Spence.”

Even Spence. Lucy felt her heart give a little flip-flop again. She tried to tell herself it was only because she was curious about the man. Only curious. But she wasn’t quite convinced that was the whole truth—at least not anymore.

The moment he caught the delighted grin on Katherine’s face, Spence knew he was in trouble. “Was it Marin or Rebecca?” he demanded over the top of the grocery bag.

“Both, actually.” Katherine’s beautiful glow wasn’t only because she was eight months pregnant but because she thought her great plan might actually be possible. “Remember last year when Lucy first joined my reader’s group, I tried to fix the two of you up?”

“How could I forget?” Lucy was the last woman he wanted to talk about. “Don’t get carried away. She needed a ride. I gave her one. She needed a place to stay. I found her one.”

“Awfully Prince Charming of you to come to her rescue.” Katherine pointed the remote at the television and clicked it off. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to tease you. I’m just so happy. Good things happen to good people, and you’re a good man, Spence. You deserve someone nice.”

He winced. He didn’t know if Lucy was nice enough. He suspected he didn’t even want to know the answer to that. He did know that he had to find everything wrong with her, every flaw, every fault so he could keep his shields ready, active and in place. Spending time with her had proved to him how necessary that was. “Do you know what I deserve? A quiet night to myself without all these errands I have to do for other people. For once I would like to be able to leave work and not have to rescue someone who got her car plowed under along the street and can’t get home.”

“Oh, no. Lucy did that? Well, she’s from Oregon. It rains most of the winter there. She probably doesn’t know.”