He stood and imagined Tim up there in the third-floor office that had once been Jeremy’s. Tim, so driven, so intense, was in love. Tim in love. Jeremy shook his head at that particular paradox. So many things had happened in a few short months. He thought about Amy and how focused she could be on any task, and how hard she must be working now that she was in charge of Nashville Living, even with her high-school sweetheart Bryan back in her life. He smiled at thoughts of sweet, shy Heather finding the man of her dreams, and her twin, police officer Chris, falling in love with an independent female reporter for the Dispatch. He worried about Melissa, hoped she was settled now that she had Richard as her husband-to-be. He’d missed out on so much with all his siblings. He’d come back for that reason. He loved his family, in spite of everything. He needed his family, in spite of everything.
He lifted his head, the memories receding as the bright morning sun hurt his eyes. He knew he’d been standing here a full five minutes. He needed to go inside, visit with the Gordons. They’d be there to greet him, as they greeted everyone who entered this building. They’d be surprised, but polite and professional, as they’d been since the day Jeremy had met both of them.
Back then, Herman had been in charge of circulation and Louise had overseen the classifieds. What a formidable team. Much later, Jeremy and his brothers and sisters had dubbed them “the Gargoyles” because no matter their positions—and they’d both had many—the Gordons were loyal to Hamilton Media. They watched over this building and its occupants with iron-clad awareness. Long ago, they’d spoiled Jeremy with lollipops and chocolate. He imagined even now Louise would give him a wink and a lollipop, her way of solving all the world’s problems.
Jeremy only wished it were that simple.
Taking a deep breath, he tried to calm himself. A silent prayer worked its way through the turmoil inside his brain. Once, prayer had come naturally to Jeremy; now it felt foreign and stilted. And yet, it was there.
I need help here, Lord. I need to find my way back, not just into this building, but back into the family I love. I need to forgive, Lord. I don’t know how to ask, but I hope You hear me. I need my life back.
Maybe that life needs to be different now, came the gentle voice.
Jeremy glanced around, sure he looked ridiculous standing there, his mouth open in a gasp.
“You’ll get more work done if you go inside the building.”
He looked up to see Dawn Leroux coming toward him, her arms full of files and papers.
“You think so?” he said, managing a weak smile for the pretty blonde. Dawn had been a guiding light in the midst of all his angst and confusion. His brother was blessed to have her in his life.
She looked very feminine in her crisp white blouse and baby-blue flared skirt. Very different from his brother’s usual girlfriends. But then, Jeremy reminded himself, his brother had changed.
Dawn stopped as she reached the door, her expression full of challenge. “What are you waiting for?”
“I’m not sure,” he replied, glad for an understanding, objective friend. “But while I’m trying to figure that out, I ought to tell you that I’ve been on the job at the church already. The daycare room has one coat of paint—sloppy and spotty—but paint, nonetheless.”
“So I heard,” she said, her smile as gentle as her eyes. “My friend Gabi gives you very high marks.”
“How do you know Gabi?”
He hated the excitement in his voice. He didn’t want to be excited. He didn’t want anyone to see him excited.
“We’ve been friends for years,” Dawn replied, shifting her load, her tone matter-of-fact and low-key. “We’ve gotten even closer since we both volunteer for a lot of the same programs at church.”
He’d never noticed either of them at church, Jeremy thought now. He’d been too caught up in his work, in his life, in his position, to put much thought into who sat behind him in church. Now, he was very curious. So much had changed. He needed to keep pace with all of it.
And he needed to know more about Gabi.
“Give me that,” he said, reaching to take Dawn’s files. In spite of his curiosity, he changed the subject to save grace. “I see my brother has you doing after-hours work.”
“I don’t mind,” she replied, her eyes lighting up. “It’s part of my job, and besides, I kinda know how the boss operates.” Then she grinned. “Tell me more about you and Gabi.”
“Nothing to tell,” Jeremy said, warning bells going off in his head. Could this woman read minds? “She seems like a nice lady.” Explain her to me, he silently begged.
Dawn complied. “The best. She’s been through a rough time lately.”
“She told me she’s a widow. That must be horrible. I mean, she’s still so young.”
Dawn’s eyes lost some of their light. “It’s been hard on her and the girls, but Gabi has a strong faith. Of course, the holidays are always the worst, but she’ll get through Christmas. She always tries to make it special for the girls.”
Jeremy took in that information, then nodded. He wouldn’t press Dawn to give him any more details. That didn’t seem right. “I can see that—I mean, she seems like a great mom.” Then he glanced toward the doors of the building, dread blocking out everything else. “Which is why she doesn’t need someone like me in her life.”
Now why in the world had he even said that? Too late, he saw the spark of interest in Dawn’s eyes. And the spark of hope.
“You might be wrong there,” Dawn retorted, pushing at the door. “You might be exactly what she needs in her life right now.”
With that, she left Jeremy standing there holding the files. But she turned once inside. “You coming in?”
He nodded at her through the revolving doors, still stunned by her remarks. “I guess I am.”
“So, have you made up your mind?”
Jeremy stood looking out the window of his brother Tim’s office, watching the river just beyond the bluffs. Glancing over his shoulder, he saw Tim swiveling his chair to face him, his eyebrows raised.
“No, not yet,” he said, turning back to the view.
Jeremy had toured the whole building, visiting with employees and family members alike, talking to each of them about how things were going. The place had kept on running without him, and he still wasn’t so sure that’s the way it should stay—without him. At least, he’d spent the better part of this morning trying to figure out if he even wanted to come back here.
But here he was, in the office at the top of the building. The office he used to occupy. And his brother was probably wondering the same thing. Did Jeremy really belong here? That was the question of the day.
For the last half hour, they’d tried to have a conversation. But as usual, Tim had been interrupted at least three times with one crisis after another. Tim thrived on crises and seemed to be handling all the balls he had to juggle with precision and decisiveness. Including what to do about his older brother’s return.
“Jeremy, are you listening to me?”
Jeremy cringed, thinking he’d once been that man. The one who came just after Wallace Hamilton himself—second in command. The one who asked the questions and got immediate answers. Now, he only commanded curious stares from the lobby to the newsroom and beyond.
Right now, his brother was staring at him, eager and impatient for an answer. “This shouldn’t be that hard.”
“No, it shouldn’t be,” Jeremy agreed, “but I’m not sure what I’m doing here.” He took a seat across from his brother, reluctant to be back in this office without being in the big chair, even if he had doubts about taking over again. “I keep thinking about the first time I came to this building with Da—with Wallace. I can’t seem to get past that.”
“I told you, you can have any position you want,” Tim responded, his tone firm but aggravated. But his eyes held a kind of understanding that was new and fresh. “I’m trying here, Jeremy.”
“I understand that.” Jeremy glanced at the neat, organized desk, itching to get his hands on today’s layout, longing to read over the editorials, to check the feature stories. Tim had everything lined up, ready to go. “I just don’t know what position I need to be in right now, Tim.” He drummed his fingers on the leather-covered arm of his chair. “You seem born to this. I’d hate to just up and take that away.”
The silent message hummed between them. Tim had been born to this. Jeremy had stumbled into it because of a deep, dark secret and his birth order. How could he take up where he’d left off?
“I do like it,” Tim finally admitted. At Jeremy’s questioning look, he added, “Okay, that was probably an understatement. I love it. But there are days—”
“I remember those days,” Jeremy replied, relaxing back into the chair. “I never realized that I probably needed some time off. I just never dreamed I’d be forced out in such a jolting way.”
“Nobody forced you,” Tim reminded him. “You quit.”
Jeremy kept drumming his fingers. No need to relive the vivid details. “So I did.”
Tim leaned back, then pressed his hands behind his head, his fingers entwined. “There is something you could do, Jeremy, for all of us. I could use some help trying to figure out who’s behind all these scandals.”
Jeremy nodded, glad to have something, anything, to focus on. “I’ve gone back and studied all the leaks. It’s obvious someone is deliberately giving juicy tidbits about our family to the Observer. That part is a no-brainer. Whoever it is, they’re very much aware that the Observer is our rival. But what do they hope to gain by all of this?”
“They want to see us fall, or bring us down a peg or two,” Tim replied, bringing his hands back to his desk with a slap. “This all started with you—or, at least, you finding out about your birth father.”
Jeremy tried not to take that comment personally, but it was very personal. “So you think it might be someone close to me, or someone who knows all the inside information that only our family should know?”
Tim shrugged. “That makes sense, doesn’t it?”
It did, but Jeremy rankled at that suggestion. “Yes, but that could apply to any one of us, Tim. It could be someone wanting to get back at Chris, maybe someone he arrested or testified against. Maybe someone wanting to sabotage Nashville Living just to bring down our subscriber base. Maybe it’s someone at the Observer, trying to win points with the boss.”
“All possibilities,” Tim said, his tone guarded. “It might even be someone who works for us, hoping to get a better offer over at the Observer. We all know competition is fierce in this business.” Then he shook his head. “Whoever this is—they want to embarrass our family by leaking personal details. And so far, they’ve succeeded. I still think it has something to do with our parents hiding the truth about your paternity. It’s gone downhill from there.”
Was his brother still trying to pin the blame for all their woes on Jeremy? He pushed that thought aside. “I don’t think all of this is just coincidence, so you might be right. But as far as I know, none of us has any enemies in this town.” Then he let out a sigh. “Unless someone is upset that I know who my birth father is now. Who would have anything to lose or gain from that though? He’s dead and my grandparents live far away. It can’t be that.”
Tim looked as frustrated as Jeremy felt. “Whoever it is has his ear to the ground, that’s for sure. They seem to find out personal things about us before we even know ourselves. I’d sure like to put an end to this, especially since Dad will be coming home soon. He doesn’t need this kind of stress right now.”
Jeremy didn’t respond to that. He was still furious with his father. He wanted Wallace to beat the leukemia, but Jeremy wasn’t ready to get all touchy-feely with Wallace.
“Are you ever going to forgive him?” Tim asked, just as the phone rang. He grabbed the receiver, then said into the phone, “Hold on a minute.” Looking back at Jeremy, he waited with a hand over the phone.
“I’m working on it,” Jeremy said. “And I’m leaving now. You’re way too busy to keep me company.”
“I don’t mind,” Tim said, but he was already waving Jeremy out the door as he gave brisk answers to the person on the other end of the line. “Okay, kill the city council update until we have a confirmation, and go with the proposal for the new factory near the river. And I want details—environmental and economical impact, the works.”
Jeremy emerged from the privacy of his brother’s office to find himself in limbo, standing in the middle of the long hallway just outside Dawn’s office area. Dawn wasn’t at her desk, so chatting with her wasn’t an option.
When did I become so needy for company? he wondered.
Then he heard the elevator swishing open, his mind going toward escape. Hurrying to catch the door, he ran right smack into the person coming out. Instinctively, Jeremy reached his hands up to keep from colliding with the petite woman.
And looked down to find Gabi Valencia in his arms.
“Oh, oh, I’m so sorry,” Gabi said, gazing up into Jeremy Hamilton’s intense blue eyes. She couldn’t move. He held her there, frozen in her tracks. “It’s you again.”
“Me again,” he said, stepping back, his hands dropping to his side, his expression full of surprise and maybe, approval. “I seem to see you everywhere I go these days.”
“It’s a small town,” she said, glancing beyond him as she willed her heartbeat to a calm, workable level. “I’m meeting Dawn for lunch. Have you seen her?”
He looked bemused, then disappointed. “You’re sure in a hurry to get away from me, aren’t you?”
Gabi felt the heat of a blush coloring her skin. “No. I’m just…running a little late.” She waved her hands in the air. “It was crazy at the hospital today.”
“You work at Community General?”
“Yes. In administration. Behind the scenes.”
“That must keep you busy.”
“Yes. And it pays the bills.”
She looked past him again. If Dawn didn’t show up soon, she’d have to get something to eat without her in order to make it back to work on time. She really didn’t need to be standing here making small talk with Jeremy Hamilton, either.
Trying to be polite, she said, “I’m sorry, I’ve got to find Dawn and scoot.”
“Okay.” His skeptical look told her she hadn’t fooled him one bit. “I was just leaving anyway. And I’m not sure where Dawn is right now.”
“Here I am,” came the breathless reply.
Gabi breathed a sigh of relief as she saw Dawn rushing toward them. “Hi.”
“Hi,” Dawn said through a long sigh. “Sorry. Last-minute orders from the Typhoon.”
They both giggled, then Gabi shot a look toward Jeremy.
Dawn shrugged. “Jeremy knows how Tim can be, right, Jeremy?”
Gabi saw a slight smile fighting to break through on Jeremy’s handsome face. “Is my hyper brother causing woe around here?”
“Always,” Dawn replied, taking Gabi by the arm. “Let’s get out of here before he barks something else at me.”
When she grabbed Jeremy with her other arm, both he and Gabi stopped to stare at each other.
“What?” Dawn asked, all coy and innocent. “Jeremy, don’t you need to eat? We’re going over to Betty’s Bake Shoppe. Might as well come with us, since my date is too busy to eat.” She lifted her head toward Tim’s office. “I’ll have to bring him takeout again.” Then she turned to Gabi. “You don’t mind, do you, Gabi?”
What could Gabi say to her friend? Yes, she did mind? Yes, she’d love to have lunch with Jeremy Hamilton? No, she couldn’t possibly have lunch with this man? Well, she couldn’t be rude, could she?
Both Jeremy and Dawn were waiting for her answer. One with a knowing smile, and the other one—well, his perfectly blank expression gave nothing away. But his eyes held a hint of hope. And challenge.
Remembering Dawn’s suggestion that Jeremy could use a friend, Gabi shot him a wan smile, while she poked Dawn in the ribs. “Of course not. It’s just lunch. And we’re wasting precious minutes, standing here.”
Dawn pushed the elevator button. “Good. I’m starving.”
Gabi got in behind Dawn, hoping she’d be able to eat. It might be hard, with a Hamilton man sitting across the table. Jeremy stood there, staring at them.
“Jeremy, are you coming with us?” Dawn asked, grinning.
Jeremy looked directly at Gabi. “I don’t want to intrude.”
Dawn, for once, stayed quiet. But she quirked a brow toward Gabi.
“You’re not intruding,” Gabi finally said, sure she’d regret this later. “Please, join us.”
He stepped into the elevator and silently pushed the button to the lobby, his gaze moving over Dawn’s smiling face before his eyes settled on Gabi. Then he gave her that hesitant little half smile she was beginning to recognize. “Lunch with two lovely women. I think my day just got a whole lot better.”
Chapter Four
Jeremy’s good mood changed the minute they entered Betty’s Bake Shoppe and Bookstore. The crowded dining area went still as everyone in town, it seemed, glanced up and right at him. The silence that followed only added to his humiliation. He wanted to turn around and leave, but one glance at Gabi and he knew he couldn’t do that.
She sent him a challenging look, followed by a soft smile. “You’re a Hamilton, remember? Act like one.”
Surprised at the spunk behind that whispered statement, he actually managed to smile back. “But they all know the truth,” he said through gritted teeth. “Maybe I should just—”
“Don’t you dare,” Dawn said, giving him her own determined look.
Gabi stood on one side and Dawn on the other, closing ranks around him. Dawn leaned close. “The truth is that you will always be Jeremy Hamilton. Are you gonna let the gossips win?”
Jeremy mulled that over, his head coming up, his gaze scanning the crowd. He might be confused and disillusioned, but he’d never been a coward. Nodding, he lifted his head even higher and met the compassionate gaze of Betty Owens herself.
“Jeremy Hamilton,” Betty said, a nervous lilt to her greeting. “C’mon on in here and let me get you something to eat.”
Jeremy breathed a sigh of relief. Betty had never been chummy with him, but she’d always been polite at least. “Thanks, Betty. It’s good to see you.”
“Good to have you back.” Betty fidgeted with the menus, her head down. “Y’all can have a table near the window. I’ll send Justine over to take your order in just a jiffy.”
Jeremy had always admired Betty’s work ethic. She was a fixture here at the Bake Shoppe, greeting customers, smiling and comparing good stories with the many book buyers. She also loved to tell juicy stories too, mostly gossip. Betty always knew anything around town before anyone else did. Maybe he should have a long talk with her. She might know who’d been leaking all these scandals to the Observer.
Then a thought occurred to him. Could it be Betty? No, that wasn’t possible. She might like to gossip, but Betty Owens would never deliberately hurt another human being with malicious intent. In fact, she’d always been a bit close-mouthed and standoffish regarding the Hamiltons.
Which made Jeremy even more curious, now that he thought about it. He appreciated her business sense as well as her book smarts. But he’d never figured out why she always seemed so distant and nervous around him, as if she couldn’t open up with him the way she did with most of her customers. Today, she looked tired. Drained was a better word. Maybe she just needed a break. He could certainly understand that concept.
Glancing around after Betty walked away, Jeremy ignored the stares and whispers, concentrating instead on the few friends who took the time to wave and smile at him.
His brother Chris’s partner on the police force, Jason Welsh, called out from the next table. “Jeremy, you old hound dog. Chris said you were home. Good to see you.”
“Thanks, Jason,” Jeremy said, waving a hand. “Where’s my brother today, anyway?”
Jason’s smile lit up his face. “He’s with Felicity. Those two are an item, don’t you know?”
“I do know,” Jeremy replied, happy for his baby brother. His half brother, he reminded himself.
He turned back to find Gabi staring at him, a pleased expression on her pretty face.
“See, it’s not so bad,” she said, her dark eyes watching him with an intensity that almost made him feel even more uncomfortable. Except that he saw no hint of pity in her eyes. More like admiration and pride.
She shrugged it off. “We’ve all been the center of gossip at one time or another.”
“It’s not easy,” he admitted, wondering when in her life she’d been in this kind of situation.
“No one is going to mess with you,” Dawn said, her tone indicating she wouldn’t allow that.
Jeremy sighed, then pretended to read over the menu.
“You two make a formidable team, but I can handle this.” He dropped the menu, his gaze moving over Gabi. “Thank you.”
Gabi sent him a warm, shy smile. “I owe you, remember?”
“You do?”
“Yes. You single-handedly painted the church daycare and nursery, didn’t you?”
He chuckled. “Yeah, and most of the floor and myself, too.”
“You did a great job, Jeremy,” Dawn said, nodding her approval. “But don’t get too comfortable. Your work at church is not done yet.”
He groaned. “Is that why you insisted on bringing me to lunch? So you could bribe me into more hard labor?”
“Maybe,” Dawn said, grinning. “Hmmm. I think I’ll have a chicken salad sandwich. How about you, Gabi?”
Jeremy waited, watching Gabi’s face as she studied the menu. “My usual, probably. A vegetable plate.”
“She thinks she has to watch her weight,” Dawn pointed out to Jeremy.
Jeremy gave Gabi another once-over. Her long dark hair fell around her shoulders in gentle waves. Her blue button-up sweater was a nice contrast to her crisp white blouse. Her clothes were nothing fancy, not like the designer outfits his sisters and his mother wore in various forms and fashions, but she looked dainty and feminine just the same.
“You look fine to me,” he said, then quickly averted his eyes to glance out the window. He hadn’t meant that to slip out.
Gabi looked down at her menu, clearly embarrassed. “My mother is an excellent cook, and I rarely have time to exercise. I have to be careful.”
Dawn shook her head. “You get plenty of exercise, running after those two girls.” Then she waved a hand in the air toward Jeremy. “Oh, you should try Mrs. Marquez’s tamales, Jeremy. They are so good.” Lifting her brow, she turned to Gabi. “Think your mom would feed this poor man?”
Jeremy gave Gabi a mock-pathetic look, just to see if he could make her blush again. “I do love tamales.”
“You’d have to get in line,” Gabi said, very pragmatically. “I have four brothers and a sister. We know the boardinghouse reach very well at my parents’ table.”
“I know that same reach, even if I was only allowed to do that whenever my mother wasn’t looking,” Jeremy said, then he looked down at the table. “Although it’s been a while since I’ve been to a Hamilton family dinner.”
“All the more reason to try dinner somewhere else for a change,” Dawn suggested, shrugging. “You don’t have to mind your manners so much at the Marquez house.”
“We have manners,” Gabi said, grinning. Then she looked from him to Dawn, clearly confused at her friend’s suggestion. “My mother will feed anyone who wants a good meal, though.”
Jeremy laughed again. “Such a nice way of saying c’mon by anytime, right? I think I get the picture. Maybe I’d better stick to my own family dinners, even though they can be a bit stuffy at times.”
Gabi was about to answer when Betty’s daughter, Justine, came over to take their orders. “Hi,” she said, her tone low. “What can I get y’all today?”
Jeremy let the women order first, then said, “I’ll have the Betty Burger, with the works.”
Justine smiled down at him, her eyes holding his for a minute, some unreadable emotion there in their depths. “Glad you’re home, Jeremy.”