Discovering You

“Please. Don’t talk like that,” India said. “We have to retain hope.”

“I have to go,” Claudia said abruptly.

India was afraid to let her hang up for fear of what she might decide. “I’m sorry about this, Claudia. I wish... I wish Detective Flores had given me better news, but...don’t assume the worst. We’ll see justice yet.”

“Is that what you think? Because there is no real justice. You get that, right? Even if Sebastian goes back to prison for life, we’ll still have to live without Charlie.”

“Which is hard to fathom. I know.”

“You do? Because sometimes I can’t help feeling...”

India’s stomach cramped at the sudden bite in Claudia’s tone. “Yes?” she prompted when her mother-in-law’s words fell off.

“As if you’re—”

Someone—her father-in-law?—spoke in the background, but India couldn’t make out the words.

“Never mind,” Claudia said instead of finishing.

That sudden reversal led India to believe Steve had anticipated what was about to come out of his wife’s mouth and admonished her against it.

“What?” India pressed, but she could guess. The Sommerses had questions about her involvement with Sebastian. They didn’t understand why she’d been associating with him again. If she hadn’t accepted him back into her life, none of this would’ve happened.

India wished she could explain. She’d tried, several times. But in light of what Sebastian had done, her reasons sounded lame. Everyone thought she, of all people, should’ve had some idea what he was capable of. Yes, she’d known he could be angry and unreasonable, even unpredictable. He’d gotten her in serious trouble when he robbed that liquor store on a whim. But he’d been young and impulsive, and he’d done what he could to make sure the police understood she’d played no part in it. That was why they hadn’t charged her. He’d apologized over and over for involving her that day.

Prison and the drugs he’d taken over the years had changed him more than she could ever have dreamed. She’d assumed he’d learned his lesson—and was just down on his luck. She’d also naively thought she could help him.

How she wished she’d never responded to that first message on Facebook. She’d been beating herself up over that ever since. At first she hadn’t understood why she’d allowed Sebastian to reconnect with her, either. But, unlike the Sommerses, she had no family. That made her hesitant to cast old friends aside, even if they’d once been boyfriends.

“We love Cassia,” Claudia said. “She’s all we have left of Charlie. Thank you for letting her stay with us.”

In other words, Charlie’s mother was biting her tongue in order to preserve the relationship. But the calm her in-laws affected almost worried India more than if they’d unleashed their anger and disappointment. So much turbulence churned under the surface of those “still waters,” probably more than she’d ever be able to overcome.

She feared where those powerful currents were carrying them...

“Of course. Cassia loves you. So do I,” she added, hoping to retake some of the ground they’d lost.

Her mother-in-law wasn’t receptive. “Good night” was all she said.

As Claudia disconnected, India let her head fall against the cool glass. It wasn’t until she heard the sound of a mower in her own yard that she remembered Rod.

She hurried out front to find him cutting her grass. “Rod!” she yelled, trying to flag him down.

When he finally heard her, he looked over.

“You don’t have to do this,” she shouted above the noise. “It’s getting a little overgrown, but I plan to buy a mower on Monday. I’ll take care of it then.”

“No big deal,” he said. “Won’t take long.”

He seemed more than capable in spite of his broken hand. And here in Whiskey Creek, neighbors probably did that type of thing for each other. But receiving even a small amount of kindness on the heels of that call with her in-laws brought a lump to India’s throat.

“Thank you,” she said and turned away before he could see the tears in her eyes.

* * *

That night, Cheyenne brought over some lasagna and garlic bread. While Natasha helped her serve dinner, Rod and his brothers tossed Kellan around, making him laugh and squeal. Cheyenne complained that they were getting him too riled up, but Rod could tell she liked the attention they paid him. Kellan certainly enjoyed the roughhousing.

“More,” he’d say whenever they stopped. It was about the only word he knew, besides Mama and Dada.

J.T. and Anya either heard the noise or smelled the food, because they entered the kitchen just as Cheyenne asked about their new neighbor.

“She’s all moved in,” Grady told her.

“I’d love to see the inside of the house now that it’s been renovated,” Cheyenne said, interested because she used to live there before she married Dylan.

“I bet she’d show you.” Mack handed out forks. Rarely were their meals formal occasions, with someone setting the table beforehand. They ate whenever they were hungry and fended for themselves or ordered out. Heaven forbid Anya would ever go to the trouble of cooking or doing the dishes, even though she didn’t work.

“You should stop by,” Grady said. “And get her number for me while you’re there. She’s freaking gorgeous.”

Cheyenne glanced up. “She’s single?”

“Not sure yet,” Mack said. “She’s wearing a wedding ring, but her husband hasn’t shown up. So...maybe he works out of the state or country.”

“He’s dead,” Rod announced.

Everyone looked at him.

“She told you that?” Mack asked.

“When she gave me a ride home last night.” Rod felt this would be the natural time to reveal that he’d be taking India to dinner tomorrow night. He’d heard Grady’s little joke about getting her number and didn’t want him or Mack to go on thinking she was fair game. But he didn’t speak up. He wasn’t sure his relationship with her would go anywhere and decided he’d wait and see how they got along before telling anyone. His brothers could be merciless; he wasn’t going to provide them with fresh ammunition.

“Why’d she give you a ride home?” Cheyenne asked. “Where was your truck?”

“She came across me after the fight, when I was trying to get help.”

“What was she doing out there so late at night? Was she at the bar, too?”

“No. She was on her way back from some art show.”

“Oh, art,” Grady said.

“Something wrong with that?” Rod asked.

Grady gave him a funny look. “Of course not. I’m just messin’ around. When did her husband die?”

“About a year ago.”

“So she’s available,” Mack said, and Rod felt himself stiffen—almost as much as Natasha did.

“She’s too old for you, bro.”

“But not for you.” Anya smiled like the Cheshire cat. “Is that why you mowed her lawn today?”

Rod hadn’t realized his stepmother had seen him. She usually stayed in her room all day, playing on the computer or watching TV. “Not necessarily. She doesn’t have a mower yet, so I figured I might as well do hers while I was doing ours.”

“And did she show you any appreciation?” J.T. joked, sending him a meaningful grin.

Rod didn’t care for the way his father talked about women since he’d been released from prison. “She thanked me, if that’s what you mean.”

“Is she nice?” Cheyenne asked.

“Seems like it,” he said.

Cheyenne took a bottle of salad dressing out of the box she’d used to transport all the food. “I’d like to meet her sometime.”

Grady sat down and dug into his meal before the rest of them could get a plate. “Why not tonight?”

Without Mack’s even asking, Natasha added a second piece of garlic bread to his plate, and Rod pretended he didn’t notice that whatever Mack received from Natasha was always the biggest and the best.

“Dyl’s getting home soon,” Cheyenne replied. “So I should head out.”

“Have him join us,” J.T said. “He hardly ever comes over these days.”

Rod suspected Anya’s presence had a great deal to do with that. Dylan liked her even less than the rest of them did.

“Can’t,” she said. “He has a baseball game.”

“We should go watch him play,” Anya suggested, but no one chimed in to encourage her.

Rod put Kellan down to accept his plate. “Thanks.” Since he wanted to speak to Cheyenne in private before she left, he hoped she wasn’t going to rush off.

“How’s your hand?” She nodded toward his cast.

“Throbbing like crazy,” he admitted.

“I made that apple crisp you like for dessert.” She winked. “Maybe that’ll help ease the pain.”

He leaned over to drop a kiss on her forehead. “Dylan got lucky the day he married you.”

“That’s what I keep telling him,” she teased.

“Will Aaron be at the game, too?” Mack asked.

“Should be,” she told them. “Dyl talked him into joining the team.”

Mack got up to get a beer and grabbed one for Rod, too. “Want to go over to the park?” he murmured so Anya and the others couldn’t hear.

Normally, Rod would’ve enjoyed seeing the game. But after being up so late, and everything he’d dealt with today, he was ready for bed. “Not tonight.”

Cheyenne put the dessert on the counter and started cleaning the spatula and serving spoons. “I’ll leave the rest of this here,” she said, indicating the leftover salad, lasagna and bread. “Just remember to take the dishes to Dylan tomorrow so he can bring them home.”

“I will,” Rod said.

She swung her son into her arms. “I’d better get going. I want to make sure Dyl has a chance to eat before he has to show up at the field.”

Rod wasn’t finished with his supper, but he stood. “I’ll walk you out,” he said so the others wouldn’t find it odd when he left the kitchen after only a few bites.

He caught up with his sister-in-law at the front door. “Before you go, could you do me a favor?”

She turned in surprise. “Of course.”

“Will you take a second to come up and look in my closet?”

“What for?” she asked.

He lowered his voice to make sure no one else could hear. Fortunately, they were all so busy eating, he didn’t think anyone was paying attention. “I have a date tomorrow.”

“And you want me to tell you what to wear? This girl must be special,” she said. “You’ve never asked for my help with that kind of thing before.”

He’d never felt so out of his element before. “She’s...different.”

“Special,” she confirmed with a grin. “Do I know her?”

He scratched his neck. “It’s our new neighbor.”

“Oh!” Her smile widened. “Why didn’t you speak up a second ago?”

“It’s one date,” he said with a shrug.

“But you’d like to impress her.” She wasn’t buying his nonchalance.

“I need to dress up a little, that’s all,” he said. “Her husband—the man who passed away—was a heart surgeon.”

“I see,” she responded. “So we’re going for sophisticated and respectable.”

At least Cheyenne seemed to be catching on to what he needed. “Yeah. That sounds good.”

She put down her son and linked her arm through Rod’s. “I have no doubt you’ll clean up nicely. Let’s go take a look.”

7

India sat in her quiet living room with a cup of tea. She’d thought some chamomile might help her relax, but it didn’t seem to be working. She was wide-awake and anxious, and looking at another long night. She wished she could read a book or watch TV. But ever since Detective Flores had told her about Sebastian, she’d been checking and double-checking her doors and windows. She wanted to believe he’d had enough trouble. That he’d slink off without bothering her again, maybe even leave the area before the police could find the additional evidence she was hoping for. Most men in his situation would flee if they had the chance, wouldn’t they?

But she couldn’t assume anything when it came to Sebastian. If he didn’t care about taking Charlie’s life, or even his own—and she knew from the way he’d been talking that he didn’t—he certainly wouldn’t care about taking hers.

Then Cassia really would be an orphan...

The report of the gun the night Charlie was shot seemed to echo in her head and she saw, again, how her husband had gasped and clutched his chest when the bullet struck him. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to avoid those memories, but she was too tired to fight them. The most gruesome images bombarded her repeatedly, as well as the worst of what’d come after—when Sebastian had forced her to tell him she still loved him, that she’d marry him and do...other things. That was the only way she could convince him not to harm Cassia. She’d never admitted to the rape. She wasn’t even sure she could call it rape, since she hadn’t refused. She’d used her body and everything else she’d needed to in order to save her child.

Maybe that was why so many people suspected her of lying. In a sense, she was. She was holding back some of the worst and, arguably, more important details. But she couldn’t admit to the methods she’d employed to stall, reassure and distract Sebastian. She feared—knew—that there’d be people who would claim she’d enjoyed it and wasn’t choking back vomit every second she let him touch her.

I’ll always love you. Sebastian had told her that. Her skin still crawled when she remembered his hands on her face, forcing her to look up at him as he said it. He didn’t know what love was. He couldn’t, not if he could murder her husband, threaten her daughter and wave a gun in her face. He’d also let his defense attorney blame her for Charlie’s death. Larry Forgash, attorney-at-law, had said she must’ve hired a killer and was now using Sebastian as the scapegoat. He’d pointed to a series of cash withdrawals from her own checking account, which was separate from Charlie’s, since she’d had it before they were married, to suggest how she might’ve paid that person, but the cash withdrawals had only added up to about $3,300 over the course of two months.

Fortunately, his defense precluded him from telling anyone they’d had sex after Charlie died. Since the police had no forensic evidence, nothing except her testimony to say he was even there, he’d had his wife claim he was with her the entire night.

India shuddered as the old revulsion welled up, so strong it made her nauseous. Forget, she ordered herself. Like the river outside, life would wend its way along and someday she’d be able to put it behind her. But she doubted that would be possible unless she could forgive herself. And how could she ever do that? Her shame at having acted as if she wanted Sebastian, as if she’d enjoyed being with him, was too great.

A gentle wind stirred the chimes on her porch. She’d made them herself, planned to carry a wide assortment in her studio, but that tinkle sounded far less cheerful than usual. She missed Cassia, wished she could go and lie down next to her daughter instead of having to worry that, when the time came, her in-laws would conjure up an excuse to try to keep her longer, if not indefinitely.

Actually, they wouldn’t have to conjure up an excuse. They had a great one, considering what they’d learned today.

India stared down at her phone. She’d received a call from Ellie Cox at dinnertime and ignored it. Ellie was the wife of Charlie’s best friend. They’d been close over the past three years, ever since Ellie and Mitchell had moved into her and Charlie’s neighborhood. But, like the Sommerses, Ellie and Mitchell now treated her with coolness. It was humiliating to have her friends turn on her, and yet the loss of her relationship with Ellie wasn’t what concerned India about her message.

India hit the play button on her voice mail, even though she’d already listened to it several times.

India, it’s me, Ellie. Give me a call when you can. I’ve been thinking about you, wondering how you’re doing. I’m sorry it’s been so long, but...we’ve been busy with Tyler’s baseball season. You know how that goes.

She did know, since she’d sat through many of his games, keeping Ellie company. Ellie could easily have stepped away to place a call or, at the very least, send a text message.

But that wasn’t what worried her.

We have games almost every night this month, what with his regular team and his competitive team going at the same time. Anyway, someone at the park told me you’d moved to Whiskey Creek. Is that true? I knew you were looking for a house, but I don’t remember hearing that you’d found one.

There it was. Someone at the ballpark had told Ellie that India had moved to Whiskey Creek. Who? Were her old acquaintances still talking about her? Did they know where she’d gone? India hadn’t told a lot of people where she planned to move, but neither had she kept it as secret as she now wished she had.

How easy would it be for Sebastian to find her?

She was just wondering if she should’ve gotten a new number, when the soft thud of a car door almost made her spill her tea. Ready to call for help should she need to, she gripped her cell in one hand, set her cup aside and crept into the living room to peer through the wooden shutters.

Nearly one in the morning was late for visitors, even on a Saturday.

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