He stepped closer to her and raised his voice to address the gathering. “Thank you all for coming on such short notice, but if you don’t mind, I’d like for us to be on our way. We want to be home before dark.”
Chuckles came from the small crowd as they parted to give him and Rena room to leave the church. He looped Rena’s hand into the crook of his elbow and led her outside.
She took a deep breath when they passed through the doors and pulled her hand free of his arm. “Thank you. It was getting to be a bit much.”
“It’s been quite a day.” He offered his hand to assist her into his wagon. She released it as soon as she was seated. The walk around the back of the wagon gave him another moment to whisper a prayer. He was in a marriage he’d never expected, to a woman who didn’t love or want him. A woman he’d never have chosen. Prayer had always been a part of his life. He imagined it was about to become a constant thing.
Scott climbed aboard and lifted the reins. The two miles to his homestead never seemed so long. The afternoon was brisk, and Rena pulled the top of her cape closer around her neck.
“There’s a blanket under your seat.”
“I’m fine, thank you.” She didn’t look at him.
Not another word was spoken until they arrived at his home.
Their home.
He set the brake and turned to her. “It’s not what you’re used to. The house and barn are done, but I want to expand the corral.” He lifted his arm to point beyond her. “There’s a good-sized garden there. Not much to it at this time of year. There’s plenty of meat in the smokehouse, and Ann did a lot of canning before she married. I made her take what she could with her.” He vaulted over the wheel onto the ground. “I thought I’d be on my own. We’ll buy what we need in town until spring.”
He walked around to help her from the wagon. She lost her footing, and he had to catch her by the waist and set her on the ground. She stepped away from him the instant she regained her balance. Her movements were so abrupt that he apologized.
The set of her mouth had only softened for the ceremony. It had returned to testify to her determination. “If you’ll show me where to unpack my valise, I’ll see to supper.”
He nodded and lifted her case from the back of the wagon. She followed him up the steps to the porch, and he opened the door. “After you.”
Rena’s back was straight, and her shoulders were square as she entered his house. She came to a stop just inside the dim interior and gasped.
Scott scooted around her and dropped her valise near the door. Not until this moment did he remember the state of the house. Without Ann’s help, he’d done only a minimal amount of cleaning. When he’d left for town this morning, there had been no idea of someone coming back with him this evening.
He went to the fireplace and struck a match against the hearth to light the fire and then a lamp. He adjusted the wick and lifted the lamp so she could see the room.
Tears swam in her eyes. He knew she wouldn’t let them fall, but he hated to add the disorder of his home to the chaos of her life today.
In spite of her predicament, he wanted to make the best of their arrangement. The house was proof that he needed someone to help him. “It’s not as bad as it seems. I promise. We can get it set in order and make it work.”
He hoped the words were true of more than his house.
Chapter Two
Rena stood in the middle of the room trying to take in the magnitude of disorder one man could bring to a space. The mess of his home paled in comparison to the mess she’d made of her life.
At that exact moment, her body reacted to the child she was carrying in a now-too-familiar fashion. She turned on her heel and sped through the door and around to the side of the house.
It was several minutes before she climbed the porch steps and reentered her new home. Much of the clutter that had greeted her earlier was in a pile near the door on the back wall, and Scott was sweeping the floor.
“You shouldn’t be sweeping. That’s my responsibility now.” She unbuttoned the top of her wool cape and slipped it off her shoulders.
“I made this mess. It’s not fair for you to clean it up.”
Rena raised her eyebrows. “Really? Isn’t that what you’re doing for me?”
He stopped short and stared at her. “That’s hardly the same thing.”
“You’re right.” She held out her hand for the broom. “What you’re doing for me—and my child—is much more important than sweeping up.” She grasped the top of the broom handle. “Please let me do my part. It’s difficult enough to be beholden to you. At least let me help.”
He released the broom. “I promise to do better. I’ve been a bit overwhelmed since Ann left. I didn’t realize how much work she did until she was gone.”
Rena swept dust from the corner behind the door. “Let me guess. You thought that because she owned a shop and spent her days in town she didn’t contribute much to the chores.” She opened the door and tossed the small rug from the entryway onto the porch. A cloud of dust rose up and blew away in the winter breeze.
“I’ll get the other rugs.” Scott rolled up the braided rug in front of the fireplace and added it to the one she’d tossed outside.
“I can do it. You need to see to the team and feed the animals. I’ll take care of the house.” She pulled back the curtain on the front window and realized, from the amount of dust and ash gathered on the sill, that it would take her several days to get the house thoroughly clean. “I won’t do it all today, but by the end of next week, things should be in good order.”
Scott brushed his hands together to remove the dust of the rug and immediately apologized when he saw it float to the floor she’d swept moments before.
Rena shook her head. “Don’t worry about it. Papa never has learned to brush his feet outside.”
“We’ll get it sorted out.” He looked at the room and then over his shoulder at the team and wagon. “I’ll take care of the outside chores and come back to help with supper.”
“That’s not necessary.” She tackled the dirt on the floor in front of the fireplace with the broom.
“I insist. We’ve both had quite a day, and I am accustomed to taking care of myself.”
She stopped and laughed. An honest, hearty laugh. “I can see that.” She opened her arms wide to indicate the room.
He smiled at her sarcasm. “It’s nice to see you laugh.” He closed the door, and she listened as his boots crossed the porch and descended the steps.
When she heard the wagon pull away from the house, she dropped onto the chair by the hearth. “What a mess you’ve gotten yourself into, Rena Livingston.” As the words left her lips, she realized she was Rena Braden now.
Nothing of her former self remained. Eugene Rodgers had left her with a child and taken everything else from her. Not even her father recognized who she had become.
Being secretly engaged to a man who’d traveled the country had been thrilling. At first. She’d gone from excitement to shame and finally to disbelief and dread when Eugene had left. Wallowing in self-pity hadn’t helped. She’d had no choice but to move forward. One day at a time. One step at a time.
Lord, give me strength.
She forced herself out of the chair and explored the house. By the time Scott returned, she had ham frying on the stove and the table cleaned and set for a modest supper.
Scott took off his hat and hung it on a peg by the door. “That smells nice.”
“It’s the best I could do for tonight.” She cracked eggs into a bowl and whisked them with a fork. “We’ll need to go into town for some supplies, unless you have an arrangement with a neighbor for milk and butter. It will make cooking easier.”
He hung his jacket by the hat. “No arrangement with the neighbors. I sold my cow to the Hendersons after Ann left. There wasn’t a need to keep her for one person. I do most of my eatin’ in town.”
She poured the eggs into the frying pan where the bacon drippings she’d found in a jar on a shelf above the stove sizzled. “I’ll need milk for cooking.” She cleared her throat, hating to ask for something else on a day when he’d done so much. “And for me to drink.”
He nodded. “For the baby?”
“Yes.”
“I’ll buy a cow tomorrow.”
Rena scooped the eggs onto plates and set them on the table. “It’s ready. I’m sorry there isn’t more to it.”
Scott joined her at the table. “Don’t apologize. It’s more than I’d have made for myself tonight.”
He sat opposite her and reached out a hand for prayer. Her father had always insisted that they hold hands while he blessed the food—even during the years she’d refused to attend services with him. This was different. Scott was a man of faith who practiced his beliefs in his home, but he was also her husband. Only in name, but still her husband.
Why then did she not want to reach across the table? She wouldn’t explore the possibility that it was a matter of trust. Her father had been her protector. Could she grow to trust Scott in time?
Scott wasn’t unfamiliar. He was often in her father’s home. But they didn’t interact more than the necessary pleasantries. She’d cooked the meals, and he’d sat across from her. The wide table had prevented them from holding hands while offering thanks for their food as he’d sat next to her father. The table here in his home was smaller. It was expected. And he waited.
She took a deep breath and dropped her hand into his. His grip was gentle, and his words sincere, as he offered thanks for their meal and for her efforts to prepare it. The next words stung her heart.
“And, Lord, please help us to make the best of this marriage. I know neither one of us saw it coming, but You take care of Your children. I’m asking You to take care of us. Amen.”
He released her hand and reached for the platter of ham.
She slid her hand to her lap. Heat spilled into her cheeks. No one had ever prayed for her except Momma and Papa.
Scott passed the ham to her. “I guess we need to talk about how we’re going to do this.”
Rena nodded and took the platter from him.
“You saw Ann’s room?” He pointed to the door in the front corner of the main room.
“I did. I took a few minutes to look around while you were in the barn.” She spooned eggs onto her plate. Her appetite hadn’t been much for the last few weeks. The baby needed her to eat, so she’d try again.
“I think it will serve you well. There’s enough space for a cradle.” He speared a bite of ham. “I hope you don’t think me too familiar to speak of such things.”
“No. There are things that must be done.” She pushed the eggs around on her plate. “Though the need for a cradle will be months away from now.”
“Can you tell me how long?” His lowered voice, and the fact that he kept his eyes on his plate let her know that he was possibly as uncomfortable with this topic as she was.
“The baby should arrive near the beginning of August.”
He looked up then. “I’ll get started on the cradle this month. I want to finish it before spring. There’ll be planting and such to do then.”
“I could see if Papa will buy one. It doesn’t seem right for you to have to build it.” It was her turn to look away. “I’m certain he’d be willing to buy the cow, too.”
“I won’t be needing any help taking care of you or the baby.” Scott set his fork down. “I know we made this decision quickly today, but be assured I considered everything I could think of before we were married. A man doesn’t let another man provide for his family.”
She’d hurt his feelings. His pride. “I meant no disrespect.”
He folded his napkin and slid his chair back. “None taken.” He took his dishes to the cabinet against the side wall of the cabin. He poured the water she had heated on the stove into the basin and slid in his dishes.
Rena jumped to her feet when she saw his intent. “I’ll do the dishes, Sheriff.” She tried to elbow him from in front of the basin.
He looked down at her, and she realized how close they were. Standing here, side by side, in their home was too familiar. She backed away and ran her palms down the front of the apron she’d found on a peg near the stove.
“Please let me do the washing up.” She wasn’t one to beg. It went against her nature. Nor was she one to accept charity. If she didn’t work, she’d feel like his actions toward her were borne of pity.
“Okay.” Scott dropped the cloth into the sudsy water and stepped back from the cabinet. “Do you think you could call me Scott? If we’re going to make this marriage appear real to the people in town, we’re gonna have to practice being nice to one another.”
“I’ll try.” She picked up the cloth and wiped the first dish. “There’s an awful lot of new things to adjust to.”
“We can do it. It’ll take time, but we’ll work it out.” He went to the back door. “I’ll bring in more wood while you do that. Then we can sit in front of the fire and finish our conversation.”
He was out the door in a swift motion. She could hear him splitting logs while she cleaned the kitchen. It seemed they had one trait in common. They busied themselves with work when they were uncomfortable.
The circumstances of the day would have them both busy for weeks to come. She was sure of it.
* * *
Scott lifted the latch and pushed the door, using one foot to open it wide enough to enter with the double armload of wood. Rena was drying the last plate when he entered the cabin.
“I’m afraid we’re in for a cold snap. The clouds gathering this evening look like they’re full of rain.” He leaned over the hearth and let the wood fall out of his arms. He added two logs to the fire and stacked the rest.
“I wish I’d thought to bring my quilts.” She shivered and wrapped her arms around her middle.
He moved the rocking chair close to the fire. “Sit here and warm up. I’ll find something for you to use tonight. We can go back to your father’s house tomorrow and gather the rest of your things.” He sat on the hearth and picked up a length of wood that he’d been whittling on for days. “Do you mind if I work while we talk?”
She shook her head. “No. I’ll be bringing my sewing with me. It’ll help to fill the evenings.”
“Ann and I would sit and work after supper most nights.” He held the wood up to the light of the fire and twisted it one way and another, deciding where to make his next cuts. “I miss her.”
“You must. Being your only family and all.” Rena set the rocker in motion. The hem of her dress puddled on the rug she’d beaten clean earlier. The toe of her shoe peeked out from beneath the fabric that swayed as she rocked.
“Martin Fleming is a good man. I knew when he and Ann met that I’d lose her to him.” He cut away a stubborn knot from the wood and tossed it into the fire.
“They seemed very happy.”
He agreed with a nod.
Silence fell in the room. She rocked, and he carved for several minutes. Then he saw her rub her arms again.
“I’ll be right back.” He put his wood on the hearth and his knife on the mantel. In his room, he opened the wardrobe and lifted the last sweater his mother had knitted for him. Underneath, he found the quilt she’d made when he was a boy. He tugged it out, returned the sweater to its place and closed the wardrobe.
Back in the main room, he laid the quilt on the hearth, careful to keep it away from sparks and ash. “I’ll warm this, and you can use it tonight.”
Rena stopped rocking and leaned close to inspect the quilt. “What a lovely pattern. Did Ann make it?”
“My mother did. Ann has one like it, but hers is pink and green. Our mother made them for us when we were children.” He picked up the knife and wood and returned to his place in front of the fire.
She reached out a hand and caressed the blue and brown starburst that formed the center of the quilt. “Are you sure you want me to use it? What about you?”
“I have another.” He didn’t want to talk to her about his mother. The woman who’d given everything she had to care for him and his sister. She’d worked odd jobs, taken in laundry, baked for others and anything else to put food on their table after their father had died.
His mother was the perfect picture of everything a mother should be. He wasn’t ready to share that with Rena. Not on the night he’d married her to give her child a name.
They were completely different women. His mother had been quiet and settled. Determined and strong.
Rena was almost never quiet and certainly not settled. Though he couldn’t deny her bravery at marrying a man she’d always kept at a distance to protect her unborn child.
He wouldn’t talk about his mother to her. Not now. Maybe not ever.
Scott put the wood aside and stood to pace behind the settee that separated the kitchen from the main part of the room. “So.” He ran a nervous hand through his hair and stepped in front of her chair. “What do you think we should establish as a sort of ground rules for what’s going on here.”
She had to crane her neck to see him, so he dropped onto the front edge of the settee and leaned toward her.
“Do you mean things like how to address one another? How to comport ourselves in public? That sort of thing?”
“Yes. We’ll have to appear friendly, or people won’t believe the child is ours.”
Her face turned pink. “Really, Sheriff, I don’t think we have to verbalize every detail.”
“Scott. You’re going to have to call me by my name.”
The color began to fade from her cheeks. “Scott.” The word was soft and seemed to come with great effort.
He answered her in kind. “Rena.” He rubbed his palms down the length of his thighs. He should not be sweating on a cold December night. “I promise to be respectful of you. Neither of us expected to be in this situation.”
“Thank you.” She avoided his gaze. “I’ll try to be friendly toward you.”
He chuckled. “You better be careful. If you start being too nice to me, people will start to think you don’t dislike me anymore.”
She jerked her head up. “Surely getting married will convince them otherwise.” She looked away and made him wonder if she was trying to cover her true feelings. “I never actually disliked you.”
“Really?” He leaned back. “Then why all those suppers where you didn’t say anything to me? You passed the food and spoke to your father, but it was clear that you were avoiding me.”
“Standoffish is probably the way I’d describe it. I guess I thought you dismissed me. That you didn’t like me as a person. So I didn’t want to waste my time or efforts by trying to build a friendship with you.” She shrugged one shoulder and stared into the fire. “I never meant to be unkind.”
“You were never unkind. But you weren’t friendly.”
“If you feel that way about me, why did you agree to this marriage?” Her eyes were open, honest. She was seeking the truth.
“I needed help here. And your father was right. A scandal now could cost him his position as mayor.”
“And you the job as sheriff? I heard that part of the conversation. Do you believe that? Could he be ousted as mayor because of what I’ve done?”
“People can be mean-spirited and unforgiving. It’s not right, but it happens.” He didn’t want to add the weight of blame to her.
“That’s so unfair.”
“It is. But we can’t worry about what might happen. We did the right thing, and now we move on. God isn’t so much concerned with where we’ve been but where we are.”
“And where are we?”
“We are at the beginning of an arrangement to benefit both of us, the child and your father. We need to make the best of it.”
“But you agree that we aren’t expecting more from me than someone to help you handle the chores here?”
“Yes. And you know that I’ll take care of the needs of you and the baby, but I’m not wanting anything like a real marriage out of this. I wasn’t looking for that with anyone. I don’t expect it from you.” Did she flinch? “I don’t mean that in an unkind way.”
“You’re merely stating the obvious.” She brushed her hands across her skirt and stood. “I think I’ll turn in. It’s been a long day, and there’s a lot to do tomorrow, if we’re going to get my things from town. I’ve got my work cut out for me here, too.”
She picked up the quilt and hugged it close. “Thank you for all you did today. I am grateful. I hope you know that.” The effort it took her to say the words was unmistakable.
He nodded. “I do.”
She closed the door to Ann’s room.
He leaned against the back of the settee with his arms crossed behind his head. What have I gotten myself into?
Lord, this didn’t surprise You, but it has thrown me like a wild horse. Help me land without getting hurt. Or hurting anyone else.
The fire crackled and settled. He added several logs to it and headed for bed. He had a feeling that tomorrow wouldn’t be the only long day in his future. He’d take them one at a time. Riding into Gran Colina with a new bride in the morning would be a challenge. Their sudden wedding would surely keep the town gossips busy for weeks to come. He hoped he and Rena could portray a convincing couple without making either of them uncomfortable.
Chapter Three
The smell of frying bacon woke Rena the next morning. Her stomach wrenched.
Please help me, Lord. How long is this going to go on? I don’t have time to be sick all day, every day. I know I don’t have a right to ask You for anything, but I’d sure appreciate a dose of mercy.
She slid her feet into her slippers and tied on her robe. She opened the door enough to see Scott at the stove with his back to her. She tiptoed across the floor of the main room and out the front door. The chilly air and damp ground were the only evidence of the rain she’d heard in the middle of the night. The sky was bright and clear.
A few minutes later, with one hand across her middle and the other holding her robe tight at the neck, she returned and hoped to make her way back to her room unnoticed.
“Oh, there you are.” Scott was walking away from the door to her room. He pointed at the table but stumbled backward a couple of steps as he took in her appearance. “I, uh, breakfast is ready.”
Rena made an effort to pull her robe tighter. She wasn’t accustomed to being in a man’s presence in such a state. There hadn’t been time to brush her hair or make herself presentable before she’d taken ill. Shame covered her again. Scott continued his backward motion until he was on the opposite side of the room from her.
“Thank you. I’ll be out in a few minutes.” She dashed into her room and closed the door. Leaning against the cold wood, she vowed to avoid another instance of being caught in her nightclothes. Even if it meant she had to sleep in one of her dresses.
When she went back into the main room, Scott was taking his plate to the basin. “I thought we’d get an early start.” He didn’t look at her.
“That’s fine. Is there anything you need me to do before we go? Gather the eggs? Feed the chickens?”
“Nope. It’s all done.” He was at the door, donning his hat. “Have your breakfast while I hitch up the wagon.”
“I’ll be quick.” She watched him button his jacket. “But you’re going to have to let me help. Tomorrow morning I’ll follow you around and learn the chores.”
He lifted the door latch. “We’ll deal with tomorrow when it gets here.” He was out the door before she could respond.
The first part of the ride to town was silent. It wouldn’t do to arrive and face all the people they knew without having said a dozen words to each other.
“If you want to drop me off at my father’s house, I can pack this morning while you work.” She held her best reticule in her lap. The navy velvet fabric and black-trimmed bag felt fancy compared to her mood. She’d worn her Sunday best for the wedding. The reticule had completed her outfit, and she hadn’t thought to pack another one in her valise.
“Do you have a trunk?” Scott kept his eyes on the road.