‘That I can’t do because they are things only a mother can do?’
‘No, Heath. Not even close,’ Tilly replied in a gentle tone. ‘You’re doing an amazing job with Oscar. He’s adorable and polite and I love him to bits—you know that. But it’s hard with you working long hours, and Dad can’t do anything while he’s laid up, so I thought I’d help out and do something fun while you’re stepping in for Dad. Stop being so hard on yourself.’
‘I’m not being hard—I’m a realist, and I think Oscar is out of his routine over here. He probably misses his nanny and preschool. Once he gets back to Sydney he’ll be fine again.’
‘I’m sure you’re right. But in the meantime let me have him for a day.’
‘Tilly’s enjoying having you both in Adelaide,’ Paul added. ‘And I’m sure she wants to make the most of it. It doesn’t happen often enough.’
‘Absolutely,’ Tilly agreed. ‘Check with Oscar and see if he’s up for it …’
‘Up for what?’ Oscar and Phoebe had left their observation spot on the lawn and walked up quietly without the others noticing.
‘A sleepover and a day with us tomorrow.’
‘Sure am—then I can go swimming with Aunty Tilly in the morning. Can I, Daddy, please?’
‘Well, I guess the decision has been made,’ Heath said, not having expected Oscar to jump at the idea of a sleepover so quickly. He’d thought they were joined at the hip, but perhaps that tie was loosening. And maybe he did need to let Tilly mother him now and then.
‘Do you want to sleep over too, Phoebe? And Daddy could too?’
Heath’s eyes widened in surprise at Oscar’s invitation to both of them.
Phoebe smiled. ‘That’s very kind of you, but I have to go home to my own bed and my pyjamas.’
‘I sleep in my T-shirt and jocks in summer,’ Oscar cut in, with a serious tone in his little voice. ‘You could do the same.’
They all smiled at Oscar’s matter-of-fact response—well, everyone bar Heath. He was still thinking about the void in his son’s life that was becoming more and more obvious. It was one that he’d thought he had managed to fill.
‘Perhaps another time,’ Phoebe said politely, thinking that there was no way she would be stripping down to her underwear for a sleepover with Heath.
Tilly tried not to laugh as she hugged her nephew and, looking at his food-stained T-shirt, she directed a request to Heath. ‘Could you drop off some fresh clothes tomorrow morning in case we want to go out?’
Still deep in thought, he responded, ‘Sure—as long as you’re sure it’s not too much trouble for him to stay?’
‘Not at all,’ Tilly said as she picked up Oscar and put him on her lap. ‘Early-morning swim for you and me, Oscar—and, Phoebe, if you’re not doing anything please come over and join us for a swim.’
Phoebe was surprised at how warm and welcoming the family was, and was very quickly feeling at home, but she declined, thinking that perhaps the offer was Tilly just being courteous.
Heath looked at his sister and then back at Phoebe without saying a word, then he kissed his son goodnight and walked out to the car. He was glad Phoebe had not accepted. She was becoming too close to his family too quickly. And starting to get under his skin a little too. He understood why she was a perfect fit for his family, with her down-to-earth personality, quick wit and sense of fun. He was also very aware that those same traits combined with her beauty were making her far too desirable to him. And he didn’t like it.
She could leave at any minute, and that wouldn’t be fair to Oscar. He didn’t want him to grow close to a person who would walk away. He needed to protect his son from that pain. And, more than that, he didn’t want their life to change.
‘I will see you in the morning,’ he called out before he drove away, with his father and Phoebe in the car.
The sun was setting as the three of them drove through the city to Phoebe’s home. Each one was thinking about the same thing. How quickly and naturally Phoebe was seeming to fit into their lives. Ken was thrilled; Phoebe was surprised—Heath was more worried than he had been in a very long time …
CHAPTER SIX
HEATH WOKE AT four and lay staring out his window to the dark sky that was softly lit by a haze-covered moon. He knew the warm air outside would be heavy and still. He rolled onto his back and lifted his arms above his head and thought back over the previous two days, since Phoebe had fallen into his arms.
He didn’t want to be thinking about her—and especially not at four in the morning, lying in bed—but her face wouldn’t leave his mind. When Phoebe had been close to him—close enough for him to smell the scent that rested delicately on her skin and close enough to see the sparkle in her beautiful green eyes—he had struggled to remember why he didn’t want a woman in his life on any permanent basis.
But that was something he had to remember. Particularly now.
His life had begun to change since he’d arrived back in Adelaide.
He had worried for a little while that the life he had built with his son, just the two of them, might not be enough for Oscar one day. And he feared now that that day was almost upon him. But he didn’t want to lose control. Once before he had lost control of a situation—lost his wife and almost lost his mind. He wouldn’t let it happen again. He needed to remain in control and not blindly accept change.
And he couldn’t accept Phoebe as the catalyst for that change.
He was more than concerned after seeing how comfortable the family had been with her. It was moving too fast for him. He had to put the brakes on the level of intimacy he thought they were all building with her. It needed to stop immediately. The air-conditioning repairman had notified him that the work was completed at the practice and while there were no patients booked in until the next day, he would send Phoebe a message just after nine and ask her to call into the practice to go over the patient notes. That would serve his purpose.
He needed to remind her why she was there—and it wasn’t to grow close to any member of his family, and particularly not his son. It was a relationship he didn’t want to see develop and risk it being torn apart when they headed back to Sydney and Phoebe headed back to her home country.
Phoebe woke early, picked up the paper and was halfway through the crossword when she got the call just after eight.
‘Hi, Phoebe—it’s Tilly. Would you like to jump in a cab and have breakfast by the pool with us? I’d pick you up, but by the time I load the diaper gang you could already be here.’
‘I’m not sure …’ She hesitated to accept the invitation. ‘This is your time with Oscar. I don’t want to infringe on that.’
‘Nonsense. I would love to chat to another adult. Away from the surgery my days are filled with nursery rhymes and potty-training, and Oscar could do with another set of eyes on him while he’s in the pool. It is hard with three of them, and my stomach is in a knot trying to keep a watch over them all. At their age it’s a bit like herding cats.’
‘Well, if you’re sure I can help, I’d love to.’
‘It’s settled, then,’ Tilly said. “See you soon—and don’t forget your swimsuit.’
Half an hour later Phoebe was alighting from a cab at Tilly’s home and a very happy little boy was opening the front door before she’d even reached the doorbell. He was wearing his swimsuit, dry flippers and goggles on the top of his head.
‘Hi, Phoebe! Have you got your bathers?’
‘Bathers?’ she asked as she walked up the paved entrance towards him.
‘He means swimsuit,’ Tilly said as she invited Phoebe inside. ‘In Australia we call a swimsuit bathers. You’ll get used to our funny expressions soon enough.’
Phoebe smiled at her hostess, then turned her attention to Oscar, ‘Yes, I have my bathers—so I hope you’re wanting to swim, because in this weather I do!’
Phoebe didn’t hear the three text messages from Heath because she was splashing in the pool with his son, and Melissa and Jasmine were excitedly screaming from the sidelines behind the child-safe fence, blocking out all other sounds. Oscar’s floating armbands were in place but Phoebe didn’t let him go for even a second. They’d had a lovely morning, stopping only for some juice and freshly cut fruit, after which Oscar walked Phoebe around the garden, collecting insects in his bug catcher.
‘I only keep them for a few hours, then I let them go back to their daddies … and their mummies. I think some of them have mummies too.’
‘I’m sure some of them have both, and some just have a mummy or a daddy,’ Phoebe said, then fell silent as he continued walking, collecting and talking.
Oscar suddenly seemed very deep in thought for a five-year-old, and it worried Phoebe a little.
‘My mummy died when I was very little.’
Phoebe felt herself stiffen as he delivered this news. ‘I’m sorry to hear that, Oscar.’ She paused to gain some composure as her heart went out to the little boy. ‘I’m sure she’s looking over you every day.’
Phoebe had not considered the prospect that Heath might be a widower. She wasn’t sure why it hadn’t occurred to her, but now she knew it did go part way to explaining why he was such a serious man, who appeared only to lighten up around his son. Losing his wife and the mother of his child would have been a life-altering tragedy.
‘I was very little. I couldn’t talk or walk and I don’t remember her. But I know her name was—’
‘Hello, you two.’
Heath’s deep voice suddenly called from the back door, interrupting their conversation and making them both turn abruptly.
Phoebe felt her stomach drop. Then it lifted, and then spun as her heart fluttered nervously. She’d thought she had her reactions to Heath under control, but suddenly she discovered she didn’t.
But she had to.
Somehow.
‘Hello, Daddy!’
‘Hi, Heath.’
Heath quickly crossed to them and dropped to his knees. ‘I’m sorry, Oscar, but I’m going to have to take Phoebe to work with me.’
‘But we’re having fun, Daddy, and I want her to stay. She showed me how to swim like a bug and …’
‘Swim like a bug?’ Heath asked, turning to Phoebe with a curious look on his face.
‘The butterfly stroke,’ Phoebe said as she looked at this man whom she now knew had suffered the tragedy of losing his wife. It did put a different filter on the way she saw him, but she didn’t want him to know that. He seemed too stoic to want pity—in fact she suspected pity would drive him into a darker place.
Despite what she now knew she didn’t want it to colour her feelings towards him. She wasn’t looking for love and he was obviously still grieving. Although she was grateful for the insight, as she would understand his motives a little better and make their working relationship easier. She just had to get her emotions under control. And he was dressed again, as he had been the night before, so it made it easier to concentrate.
‘How did you know I was here?’ she asked, trying to mask how sad she felt for them both. And how equally drawn she was to the father and son.
‘Well, you didn’t answer your phone, so on the off-chance that my sister had convinced you to visit I called her and she said you were swimming with Oscar. Unfortunately I’ll have to cut that short and ask you to head back to the surgery with me.’
‘Like this?’ She looked down at her swimsuit covered by a sarong. She had chosen not to wear her bikini that day, and had slipped the one-piece swimsuit under her sarong before she’d left her house. ‘But if the air-conditioning isn’t running maybe this is the right thing to be wearing.’ She tried to be lighthearted. Friendly. At ease. Everything she wasn’t feeling.
Heath had tried not to look at her body, but he couldn’t help but notice how stunning she looked. He definitely didn’t want to be alone with her at the practice in the outfit she was barely wearing.
‘Perhaps not,’ he replied, trying to avert his eyes from her petite curves. ‘I can drop you home to change, if you’d like.’
A little while later, after a quick stop at her house for a change of clothes, they sat reading through the patient notes in the cool surgery. The newly repaired and efficiently running air-conditioner was working perfectly, but Phoebe had the distinct feeling that this activity wasn’t really essential. They were straightforward records that could easily have been read through prior to her meeting with each patient.
She wondered if it wasn’t so much her being at the practice that was important but perhaps more her not being at Tilly’s house with Oscar. She wasn’t sure why but she said nothing, and continued to concentrate for the next two hours on the records that Heath was explaining in great detail.
Occasionally she would glance at the man across from her. His chiselled jaw, with a light covering of stubble, was tense. There was no half-smile. She realised there was no chance of a full smile and she knew why. Despite her resolve to keep it professional, still she felt her heart pick up speed a little when their eyes met by accident. And at that time, they both paused for only a moment in silence. She didn’t know how he was feeling or what he was thinking but there was something Heath was keeping to himself.
And she suspected it was his heart.
Finally she left to go home. It was a short walk, and she wanted the time to clear her head. She now knew that Heath was still suffering from the loss of his wife and although she also knew that Oscar had been little when his mother had died she wasn’t sure exactly how long ago it had happened. Three years? Four years? Even five?
But there was one other thing she knew. Heath must have loved his wife very much, and if it had been half as much as he clearly loved Oscar then, although her life had been cut short, his wife had been a very lucky woman to have known that deep a love and commitment. It was something that Phoebe knew she had never experienced. And probably never would.
‘Why don’t you guys move here permanently?’ Tilly asked, sitting down and pouring herself a cold soft drink after dropping Oscar back at her father’s later that day. Paul had arrived at her home to mind the twins for a little while. ‘I adore Oscar, and I’d love Mels and Jazzy to grow up with their big cousin to keep the boys at bay. I think it makes complete sense.’
‘My thoughts exactly,’ Ken agreed, while admiring the stunning violet and red hues of the setting sun. The lighting provided a canvas for the silhouettes of the towering gum trees that surrounded his home and the scent of eucalyptus floated in the night air.
But Heath didn’t notice anything. He could still remember the scent of Phoebe, sitting so close to him at work, could see her beautiful face, and nothing he did was successful at pushing those images from his mind. He could vaguely hear the mutterings of his father and his sister, but none of it registered. His mind was consumed by thoughts of Phoebe and he felt uneasy. Her sweetness. Her sincerity. She had stumbled into his world and into his arms quite literally, and for some inexplicable reason he couldn’t shake her from his thoughts. But he wouldn’t break another rule. He had to ignore this fleeting infatuation.
Heath came back to the conversation to see two sets of eyes on him, seeking answers. He didn’t like the fact that a family inquisition was developing on the back porch because there was another one going on in his mind and one was more than enough to endure. Two would certainly send him crazy.
‘The air-con is now working and that’s all that matters. Let’s leave it at that. Phoebe is a surgeon, in town to meet the terms of her employment contract. And, by the way, Tilly, she can’t be your babysitter.’
‘My babysitter? That’s a little unfair. She knows no one, and she was alone in her house, and I thought she’d enjoy a swim and a chat. And, FYI, Oscar totally commandeered her for the better part of two hours and that was not my plan—it was his.’
‘Well, I’m here only until Dad’s knee mends. End of story. So I hope Oscar doesn’t get comfortable with the current arrangements. It’s all only temporary.’
With that Heath stood up and went inside to find his son. Reading him a story was always a highlight of his day, but that night it would also serve as his avenue of respite from the barrage of questions about Phoebe.
And for a short while it might also silence those inside his head.
‘I like Phoebe,’ Oscar told his father as he went to turn out the light. ‘She’s neat.’
‘As in tidy?’
‘Daddy, you’re being silly. Not tidy. She’s fun—and she makes you happy too.’
Heath was taken aback by his son’s words. ‘What do you mean by that?’
‘Well, I saw you smile. You don’t smile very much. I always thought you were sad, but now that Phoebe comes over you’re happy more. That makes me happy too. It’s almost like we’re a family—like Aunty Tilly and Uncle Paul.’
Phoebe called London after she’d eaten her takeaway dinner. She wanted to chat with Susy and hoped with the time difference that while it was evening in Adelaide she would catch her young barrister friend before she left in the morning for court in London.
‘Phoebs, how are you?’
‘I’m great—how are you, Susy? And how’s work? Anything interesting that you can talk about?’
‘I’ll put you on loud speaker—trying to finish my make-up before I rush out the door.’
‘If it’s not a good time I’ll try another day,’ Phoebe said as she rested back into the three soft white pillows on her bed.
The ceiling fan was moving the air above her and Phoebe had opened a window on the approaching darkness. She knew she would be in air-conditioning all of the next day and she wanted to sleep with fresh air, even if it was a little warm.
‘No, I’m good to talk. Nothing to report. There was a guilty verdict in the grand theft case, which I was thrilled about, and today I’m selecting the jury for a new IT case. Possession of data with intent to commit a serious offence. Same old, same old.’ Susy laughed. ‘I do love my job. We’ve been securing a high percentage of convictions lately, so it makes it all worthwhile. Unfortunately there’s never a shortage of bad guys needing to be put away. But let’s forget about me—how are you on your adventure Down Under?’
‘It’s hot—melting hot, to be accurate.’
‘Well, I don’t feel even a teeny bit sorry for you, if that’s what you’re hoping for. I spent last night in my Wellingtons, overcoat and scarf, shovelling snow off my car in case I need it in an emergency. I’ll take the Underground into London again today. So, my sister from another mother, stop complaining—’cos while you’re over there, getting a suntan, I’m warding off frostbite!’
Both women laughed.
Then Susy’s voice became momentarily stern. ‘Seriously, Phoebs, has the creep left you alone? And your mother—is she finally coming to terms with the fact that Niles won’t be a member of the family?’
‘It’s Giles …’
‘I know … but I prefer to disrespect him at every opportunity, and forgetting his name is a start.’
‘I promise he’s out of the picture completely. Mother is still not convinced, but I’ve given up on telling her that cheating is a deal-breaker.’
‘Absolutely,’ Susy agreed, in her prosecuting barrister tone. ‘Guilty, charged and dumped. I do wish there was a way to lock him and those tarts away. Pity there’s no legal avenue to put the lot of them behind bars and throw away the key.’
‘In a perfect world there would be, but I’m trying not to think about him any more. Just onwards and upwards. I’m starting work tomorrow with … Heath.’ Phoebe stumbled over his name.
‘I thought you were working with Ken Rollins? Who’s Heath?’
‘His son, actually. Ken needed emergency knee reconstruction. His son’s a podiatric surgeon too, so he’s stepped in to help out for the next few weeks.’
‘I hope you’re not disappointed? I know you were really excited to be working with Ken.’
This was now the third time she had been asked and still her answer remained the same. Disappointed, no … confused, yes … and now she was feeling a little melancholy about what had made Heath the man he was.
‘I was looking forward to working with Ken, but I’m sure Heath will be an equally good operator.’
‘So good to hear you back to your old optimistic self, Phoebs. I’d love to chat and hear all about Heath, but I have to dash. The Underground waits for no one,’ Susy said. ‘Hope sonny-boy is not too nerdy or dull—but it’s only for a few weeks. Talk tomorrow. I’ll call you.’
With that, Suzy hung up.
Nerdy? I wish … Dull? Not in anyone’s book. In fact she had to admit that Heath seemed perfect … if a little battle worn.
Heath arrived at the practice early the next morning. He had a surgical list beginning at one, with two post-operative patients and two new patients in the morning. Phoebe’s day was light—three morning patients and two in the afternoon. Heath had arranged it that way to allow her to settle in.
Generally December was not busy, as most patients delayed non-urgent treatment, particularly surgery, until after the busy holiday season. By the time her patient numbers increased Heath knew he would be back in Sydney and his father would be back on deck.
‘Good morning,’ Tilly greeted her brother as she dropped her bag behind the desk. ‘Loving the cool air in here.’
‘It’s great, isn’t it? Not sure the landlord will be thrilled when he sees the invoice, but it’s worth every penny.’
‘Dad owns the building. He’s the landlord.’
Heath laughed. ‘Yes—and hopefully I’ll be back in Sydney when he gets the bill in the mail. I had it completely overhauled and replaced the motor.’
‘I think he can cover it.’
‘Not sure about that, since he has the most expensive receptionist in the country.’
Tilly rolled her eyes and smiled. ‘You’re in fine form today, Heath. Be nice to your sister or I’ll walk out—and then you’ll be lost without my administrative wizardry.’ Heath headed back to his consulting room, and on the way checked that everything had been prepared for Phoebe. Her patient list was all in order. He had set up her log-in details for the computer and given her access to the database with the patient notes. The room was spotless. Although he refused to admit it to himself, he wanted to impress her.
‘Hi, Phoebe,’ Heath heard his sister say cheerily from the other end of the practice.
‘Hi, Tilly,’ Phoebe replied. She stepped inside, feeling apprehensive and nervous, as if it was the first day at school. ‘It’s a lot cooler than a couple of days ago in here.’
‘Hopefully we can avoid doctors and patients fainting,’ Heath said as he walked briskly down the corridor and into the waiting room.
‘Good morning, Heath.’
‘I’ll show you to your consulting room.’
Phoebe could sense that he had slipped back into his cool demeanour again, but he wasn’t quite as cold and she did not take it personally.
‘I’ll try not to faint on the way,’ she said, in an attempt to lighten the mood.
Heath smirked, but because he was leading the way Phoebe didn’t see. Her view was his broad shoulders, slim hips and the long stride he was taking. And, despite not wanting to notice, it was the best damn view she had seen in days. In fact the last time she had seen anything so impressive was in the very same man at the pool.
‘Nancy Wilson?’ Phoebe called into the waiting room.
A young woman stood up and followed Phoebe into her consulting room, hobbling a little and clearly in pain.
Phoebe closed the door. ‘Let me introduce myself, Nancy. I’m Dr Phoebe Johnson and I’ve stepped in to help Dr Ken Rollins for the next few months. Please take a seat.’ Phoebe had briefly read the patient’s notes and was aware of her medical history of chronic heel pain. ‘I see you have undergone some reconstructive treatments with Dr Rollins.’
‘Yes, but it hasn’t made a permanent improvement.’