Mission 777 Possible
– I’ll take this, this, and this, – Yana’s mother said. The Arab packed everything into a bag and happily saw the customers out.
We continued walking.
– Oh, the Mirage Hotel. – Do you know there’s a water park and a pool here? – Yana said.
– Wow, I’d love to swim in the pool, the sea is so cold, – Marianna.
– Well… we just pass through, there’s security at the entrance, but we might get through – Yana.
With stone faces, we walked past the hotel security and reached the pool. Here it is – the blue pool with slides, beautiful…
Someone approached from behind: – Ma’am, you’re not from our hotel, please leave.
– Why not, we’re from the neighboring hotel, – Yana.
– You don’t have Mirage Hotel cards, pay fifty euros and you can swim, – said the guard.
– Well, no… – we said in unison, and left.
Hurghada. Marianna by the pool of her hotel with Yana and her mother, a dry little old lady, but still quite lively. Yana, in a thin voice, turns to Marianna: – Marianna, can you do us a favor… we have a request.
– I’m all ears.
– Please go to the market, remember the shop where we got the cosmetics from the Arab, we need to return it. We took a lot of things and said we’d bring the money, but we want to give it all back, it’s too expensive for us.
– So return it, what’s the problem, – Marianna.
– Well, it’s awkward, and if you bring it back, he won’t be angry. When these Arabs get angry, they can curse you.
– No problem, I’ll take it back, I’ll go.
Marianna at the market. She approaches the shop. She hands the package to the Arab. The Arab, standing by the doorpost of the shop, flashes his eyes, shrugs, and takes the package back. Marianna leaves, the Arab staring daggers at her back.
The Spirit of the Desert
Egypt. Today is the last day in Hurghada. Only six days. We splurged on the last day. Marianna’s eyes were shining. Crabs were served for dinner, small ones, but Marianna and the kids enjoyed them as if they were an exotic delicacy. Yana and her mother approached the table and sat with us.
– Try this wine, – Yana offered.
Marianna shrugged.
– It’s very tasty, – Yana urged.
Marianna sipped from the clear glass, the light brown wine. Heat spread from her mouth to her stomach.
– Strong…
She drank more from the glass.
– Wait a minute, – Yana took the glass in her hand, – This is rum, definitely rum, but tasty.
Warmth spread through Marianna’s body, making her feel good and cozy.
Dinner ended. Marianna, Nikolash, and Albert walked through the hall of the long corridor with many small shops. Marianna looked at the goods through the glass. Here were tea, spices, and something unidentifiable. They entered a shop with papyruses. A young Egyptian was bustling about selling papyruses.
– I’ll take this one, please, – Marianna pointed to a golden papyrus with the faces of a man and a woman looking into each other’s eyes.
– Look, – the Egyptian turned off the light, and an image of an eye appeared on the papyrus. Miracles… (Marianna’s thoughts).
I would buy all the papyruses here if I could, they are extraordinary…
The papyrus seller looked at Albert:
– He doesn’t look like yours, he looks like our children.
– Yes… he’s dark-skinned, – Marianna noted.
Returning to the room, Marianna put the children to bed and decided to take a walk, to stroll one last time, as tomorrow they were leaving.
She walked around the hotel, listened to the performance of Egyptian singers in national costumes in the hall, and headed to the elevator. As she entered the elevator, she saw an Arab slip in quickly. Marianna recognized him: he was the porter who carried their luggage when they arrived. He was short, with small, unremarkable eyes, thin and fidgety. He was probably from a deep, poor Egyptian alley, working here for pennies to survive. The elevator seemed to take forever. Marianna’s eyes met the Egyptian’s.
– You’re beautiful, – the Egyptian said, looking into Marianna’s eyes.
I guess I am beautiful… in my black top and pants (Marianna’s thoughts).
The elevator stopped. The Arab didn’t seem to be leaving and followed Marianna to the door like a shadow.
– Can I come in? – he hesitated in front of the door, shifting from foot to foot.
– No, why, the children… – Marianna backed up to the door, entered, and quickly closed the door behind her.
– Whew…
A minute later, the phone on the nightstand rang.
Who is it, maybe the receptionist?
Marianna picked up the phone:
– Hello, it’s me, open the door, just for a minute, – the Arab’s voice came.
Marianna hung up and calmly went to take a shower.
A knock on the door, very quiet, scratching.
I won’t open it, it’s probably him… Five minutes later, the phone rang again, another call.
Enough… Marianna felt uneasy.
Then a knock on the door. The knocking continued. Marianna paced from corner to corner of the room.
Knock again. Okay, I’ll open and explain to him.
Marianna opened the door slightly and didn’t notice how deftly the Arab slipped into the room, into the corridor. He entered the room, walked around, and stopped, mumbling:
– This will be our little secret, no one will know.
– But I’m married, – Marianna.
Why did I let him in (Marianna’s thoughts), but he’s already here, I need to get him out somehow.
– Quiet, the children are sleeping, better come this way. Marianna guided the Arab closer to the door, they entered the open door of the large bathroom.
The Arab stood opposite Marianna. Marianna with a towel on her head, and another around her hips.
– No, sorry, you have to leave, – insisted Marianna.
– I guess you don’t like me, – the Arab said disappointedly.
– Well, one last thing, – the uninvited guest said in the corridor, and before Marianna could react, his tongue slipped into her mouth, making snake-like movements. Marianna recoiled.
As he left, the Arab turned, piercing her with his narrow eyes, filled with the hatred of a murderer.
The girls talked about the Egyptian curse, will it really affect me… he looked so angrily, gave me chills, his hateful gaze pierced my eyes (Marianna’s thoughts).
Marianna lay down on the fold-out couch. Now she couldn’t sleep. Marianna recalled standing in the bathroom with a towel around her hips, and the Arab looking at her. What if he… his tongue when he left… The spirit of the desert came to tempt Marianna. From the side of the pyramids, across the hot sands of the desert, the spirit wriggled its tail, strong and powerful. Marianna could never have imagined that in this frail, young Arab was the sinister spirit of the desert.
Alex
Not far from the town of Semivetrinsk.
Marianna is in the forest, sitting on a bench. In the distance, on a clearing, Nikolash and the children are practicing Jiu-Jitsu with their coach. It’s a summer sports camp. Marianna sits and enjoys the forest scent of pine. The training ended, and the kids dispersed. Marianna watches as the coach, Alex, approaches her. Alex was a coach in Japanese Jiu-Jitsu, the coach of the children’s section that Nikolash attended. Alex stopped near a pine tree, leaned against it, and stood with his legs slightly crossed, looking at Marianna. Marianna couldn’t take her eyes off Alex either. There was something magnetic in his squinting gray eyes. She felt they had been staring at each other for too long and looked away, for instance, at the nearest pine tree.
– Why was he looking at me like that? – Marianna thought, examining her summer flowing dress.
Marianna didn’t stay long at the summer camp and, after leaving Nikolash there, was about to head to the bus.
– Wait! – she heard Alex’s voice calling after her.
– The guys will drive you home! – he said, pointing to the Jiu-Jitsu coaches’ Jeep. Marianna realized that Alex had arranged this for her, which warmed her heart. Marianna got into the car, and within an hour, she was home in her little town.
After that encounter, Marianna often recalled her meeting with Alex and his gaze.
I am changing
I dreamed of changing. I couldn’t pass by fur coats in the store, so I bought a fox fur coat on installment, paying part of the money. The coat was good, leather-based, two-thirds sleeve. But that wasn’t all: I was drawn to the wonderful salon “Etalon,” the best one where my acquaintance worked. Now I will be beautiful, I do this for him with great desire and joy.
I look at myself in the mirror, sitting in the salon chair, and the hairdresser turns me into a beauty.
“Shall we dye your hair some more?” the hairdresser asks.
“Yes, let’s dye it, and choose a conditioner.”
In the evening, Marianna couldn’t sleep; you could see her lying on the couch, watching YouTube trainings and sessions on how to appeal to men. There, a millionaire’s wife talked about what one should be like and how to behave. Well, I’m just a simpleton, I need to be better. I’ve never been like that and never understood such things. Once at sixteen, I put on sunglasses to look fashionable and walked down the street. A young sarcastic neighbor walking by said frankly, “Oh, take them off! Marianna, take them off, for God’s sake!” Apparently, the glasses didn’t fit.
Now I will learn to be beautiful, and I continued to listen to videos on YouTube. There’s so much to know… about luxury watch brands, cars… Marianna listened on YouTube to a dialogue between two relationship coaches, a woman, the same millionaire’s wife, and a prominent figure, psychologist, and expert on women and men. They asked each other questions, sat and looked at each other. Marianna was all attention, analyzing and applying it to herself.
Voices came from the phone screen where the video was being streamed:
“Girl in pink! This concerns you!” Both looked at Marianna.
Marianna looked at the frills of her pink blouse lying on the bed. Is it about me?
“Yes, I’m listening, I haven’t missed anything.”
Then a young man appeared on YouTube and began to talk about how to behave with a girl with a guy, and how cool it is to flirt. It was Lev Vozhevatov, a blogger; it’s interesting to listen to him, just cool. That’s how it goes… Now I’ll listen to Lev until one in the morning.
***
It’s him… It’s definitely him… Alex. Whom I’ve been waiting for my whole life. His eyes, his movements, this is the meaning of life. And now what difference does it make that there’s a wife, it doesn’t matter at all… And Borjka… what’s the difference… The main thing is us, Alex and I. How everything turned upside down inside me… And then I remembered a moment about women, a dialogue with a young beautiful lady. She said then, “Oh, how I want to fall in love, so that everything inside turns upside down, so that peace is disturbed, so that guts are turned inside out.” And that’s exactly what happened to me…
Life-Giving Force
What kind of feeling settled in Marianna? It is joy and happiness. This must be how Adam and Eve felt in the Garden of Eden. Unrestrained happiness of the soul, and it seems nothing else is needed. You want to laugh, dance, sing; this feeling fills you with hot plasma, bursting from your eyes, spreading throughout your body. Marianna reveled in this bliss like opium, because nothing else in life is needed, joy filled every cell of her body. Such joy and happiness I have never known before. Directing myself more and more towards love for him, in the flow of love emanating, I came to this thought:
Yes, this is love for Christ. It’s the same thing. I looked into my eyes in the mirror. What was there… Burning with divine fire, deep, greenish, hot, all-encompassing. A feeling of joyful bliss, like being on drugs. And nothing else is needed, this is the meaning of life, I laugh, rejoice from this love, I want to laugh like a madwoman. Love for a person is love for God, I came to this realization. There is no place for envy, sadness, or melancholy here, only drive, fountains, streams of blissful ecstasy.
This is music… I want to dance, move my body smoothly, merging with the music. Marianna puts on her headphones and for the hundredth time listens to the song from the movie “Return My Love” about Vera: here appears the face of the handsome Stanislav Bondarenko, and Vera herself, they connect eyes; the song carries you away, warms you like a blazing fire, waves run from the music from top to bottom and to the heart, enhancing love with its drug.
Marianna stands in the corridor between the kitchen and the dining room, sees her reflection in the phone: eyes filled with life-giving force.
I wonder if Alex feels this too… Yes, it seems he looked strange in his Facebook3 photos, laughing his head off, and I thought there was madness in his eyes, and the same divine fire in his eyes. Probably, this force has struck both of us. And this feeling cannot be hidden, and it seems the whole of Semivetrinsk already knows that I am in love, that I walk around thin and pale; people might even be laughing at me…
Do You Hear?
I need just a little of your love,
Do you hear?
And allow me to be where your thoughts are,
Breathing!
I will forever be in your thoughts —
Different ones.
And in ordinary days, just for us,
Idle ones.
And as much as fate gives me —
This one,
I want to think of you —
In summer.
And in my thoughts, I’ll be with you
Forever!
And you don’t even know I am —
Somewhere…
Like a Fool
Marianna walks into Alex’s office.
“Oh, good day!” Alex beamed with a smile.
He pulled a new sports uniform for Nikolash from the closet and handed it to Marianna. Preparing for the meeting, she wore her new white blouse with colorful ruffles on the shoulders and front. He’s looking at me now, Marianna notes, I wonder how I look…
Alex squinted and looked at her, at her mouth as she spoke.
“Alright, thank you, I hope it fits him,” Marianna replied.
“Will Nikolash participate in the competition?” Alex asked, squinting his eyes.
“Yes, I hope… he will want to.” But Marianna’s thoughts were elsewhere, and she just gazed at Alex, spellbound, trying to guess what he felt. Alex smiled and lightly touched Marianna’s hand.
A golden fire touched Marianna, running through her body and bringing bliss. Only God could touch like that, with His touch. At least, that’s what Marianna thought. She was nervous and wanted to leave quickly, to run away, yet it was also so sweet to just be near Alex.
After saying goodbye, Marianna left Alex’s office and headed to the bus stop.
“Oh God, how ridiculous I am in these ruffles on my blouse… He looked at me so strangely… I looked silly…” Marianna blushed, remembering the meeting.
“I clenched a crumpled bill,
In my hand swiftly now,
I acted like a fool with you,
During our conversation – this time.
Seeing you – I forgot everything,
Tried to pick my words;
I spoke incoherently,
Not knowing what to say…
And you – my golden-haired prince,
A poet’s dream and poems,
And I acted like a fool,
About this meeting – all, without words…”
White Light
Alex opened the coach’s office door and appeared before Marianna in all his glory. Marianna stood up from the bench and looked at Alex, who was slightly to the side. His face was poorly lit due to the light in the room. Marianna seemed to barely breathe; she was thin, fragile, and defenseless in that tight blue blouse, which barely covered her soul and emaciated body. Her soul was open and exposed, it seemed like anyone could step on it and it would break, and the feeling was delicate and shameful, visible to all. Suddenly, from Alex’s direction, Marianna saw a white beam, a gentle white light connecting her with Alex, flowing from him towards her. Marianna subconsciously recognized it as divine light.
“How are you?” Alex took steps towards Marianna, looking at her and smiling.
Marianna rushed as if towards Alex and closer to the source of the light, but suddenly saw the Head Coach come out of the room on the left, catching her off guard, so to speak. His face looked sternly with judgment. This was the Apostle Peter. Marianna sat back down on the bench and no longer tried to approach Alex. She thought about that white light she saw today in the evening, reviewing an encyclopedia about the light spectrum. Scientific sources spoke of different colors, but for some reason, she saw white light, like a beam from a spotlight.
Eagle Nose
“I also want to do Jiu-Jitsu!” Albert said one day. “Mom, Nikolash goes, and he’s already brought home so many medals.”
“Son, it’s too late for you to start that now. Kids start there at five years old.”
“Well, maybe he can try…” Marianna thought. “I’ll talk to the coach, and you can go on weekends. It’s a paid activity anyway.”
Marianna brought Albert to the Jiu-Jitsu club. Alex came out of the coach’s office and approached Albert.
“Oh! Hi!” he said, shaking his hand.
Alex showed him where the locker room was and took Albert to the hall. Marianna sat in the corridor, waiting for the training to end.
Finally, tired of sitting in one position, she went down to the basement where the gym was located. I’m worried about Albert… Everyone there is experienced, and it’s his first time.
Marianna stood at the gym door and could see Albert doing exercises. And the white uniform came in handy – Marianna thought, looking at her son. Sparring began. Marianna saw the coach pair Albert with small but experienced fighters. Opposite Albert was a little girl, briskly delivering blows. Albert dodged. The girl attacked harder and struck Albert in the face. Albert covered his nose with his hand, and Marianna saw red blood flowing down Albert’s white uniform. The coach led Albert out of the hall, apologizing: “She’s a terminator, not just a girl! Put ice on it in the medical room. How did this happen…” Marianna fretted. Why did I bring Albert here? He’s unskilled, slow…
Marianna noticed Albert’s nose was crooked, now with a bump, resembling a beak. She started to realize that his nose was broken. But nothing could be done…
***
Soon, the story of Jiu-Jitsu was forgotten, only the crooked, bump-nosed Albert reminded of it. Albert became seriously interested in hockey and hurried to the ice rink almost every day. Marianna noticed how handsome Albert looked in that hockey uniform on the ice…
Baba Yaga
Marianna met Valya at the Ice Arena. Valya also brought her grandson to hockey. Although Valya was older than Marianna, she had a special energy, joking and cheering everyone up. When she spotted Marianna, she waved from afar. Marianna liked her too. Valya also visited Marianna in the hospital, sometimes to get a medical certificate for her grandson or for advice, especially if Valya had a backache.
Marianna’s first day back at work after returning from Egypt was tough. She had to wear a white coat and attend to patients even though she wasn’t feeling great. The door to the office slowly opened. Marianna saw a huge nose with a hairy wart and an old lady’s face poking through the door.
“Baba Yaga!” Marianna whispered to herself.
Then Valya’s whole body appeared in the doorway.
“Hello! So glad to see you, dear!”
Baba Yaga walked up to Marianna’s desk and kissed the top of her head. Then she talked about her problems, and Marianna helped her.
“Alright, I’ll be going now, Grandpa is waiting!”
“Is that Ivan, your grandpa?”
“Oh, come on, it’s Stepan! I have a new husband now!”
Baba Yaga creaked the door and left, hunched over with her nose forward.
Marianna pondered, “I wonder how many times Baba Yaga has been married? Probably three times, like Valya.”
***
In the evening, a post from Baba Yaga appeared on Marianna’s Facebook4 timeline with a picture and a caption.
Mariana read: “Read the Gospel!”
I’m sick
Leaves entwined in braids,Why should I grieve?It’s October now,How long to wait indeed…How I wait for you,How I long – it’s true,You – my dream so dear,Long-awaited too.I am sick – because of you,I am sick.You – my love and disease,You – my betrothed.October rustles leaves so dry,Why feel dismay?I am ill – because of you,And I like it this way.Headache grips, oh, so tight,What more can I say?I’ll call you right now,Better than to write.I’ll dial your number now,As I’m unwell.You – my love and vow,With eyes so grey.
My Death
To write or not to write to Alex?
Why… I won’t. The phone lies nearby on the table. Marianna feels as if some force compels her hand to rise, overcoming resistance; her hand trembles as she picks up the phone. She nervously opens Viber and sends a smiley face to Alex. As if some higher power is controlling Marianna’s hand like a puppet on strings, making the doll do what Marianna does not want. In response, Alex sends a smiling emoji – a big moving finger.
Then a video arrives from Alex. Marianna opens YouTube. What the heck… Marianna continues to watch the video, where bottles are moving on a conveyor belt, with text explanations: this bottle – for this, this one – for that, and this one – for what? This is not necessary. What did he want to say by this? That I am not needed because he is married? He probably wanted to say that he has everything: a wife for sex, a job for money, and I… why does he need me…
I didn’t want to write to him…
Scrolling through Facebook5 feed, Marianna sees a response: “you are instruments.”
In other words, our bodies are used for something, both me and him, we are instruments.
Then some force wanted me to call Alex, and I was absolutely sure that I wanted this. I suggested meeting to Alex, maybe he wouldn’t have decided, but some unknown force made me cautiously offer first. I have a small private office in the center of town, we’ll meet there. We agreed on the time, and Alex promised to come. The meeting time has come. I am already waiting… the meeting is at fourteen o’clock, maybe he will break away between training sessions and come. As promised. There are my icons in the office that I brought from the Svyatogorsk Monastery, they will protect us. He will come.
It’s already 2:10 PM… I’ll wait a little longer, he’s delayed. If it didn’t work out, he would have called. It’s 2:35 on the clock… He’s not here. He won’t come… Marianna plunged into emptiness, not even despair, it’s death.
I’m dead… A strange feeling when you die. I was still walking down the street, doing something, but I’m dead. I’m gone now. He didn’t come, and it doesn’t matter why: “whether he had a horse, or didn’t know the way, mother wouldn’t let him…” – like in the Ukrainian song. It makes no sense to me now, he doesn’t need me. I came home, sat down on a chair, put my hands in my hair, and began to squeeze my head. Phone call. It’s him. Marianna grabbed the phone.
A busy silence on the line, sounds, – Marianna, sorry, it didn’t work out… – Alex mumbled – pause, – There was a meeting… – Alex justifies himself.