Regency Pleasures and Sins Part 1

Chapter Twenty

Nicholas sauntered casually out of the retiring room just in time to see Tallie turn from William, fumble in her reticule for her handkerchief and disappear into the sitting-room which had been set aside for ladies.

He laid a none-too-gentle hand on his cousin’s shoulder. ‘And just what have you said to Tallie to upset her?’

‘Damned if I know,’ William retorted defensively. ‘All I said was that there was something I wanted to ask her and she said, “Not you as well? It is too much” or some such nonsense. Then her eyes filled up with tears and off she bolted!’ He looked aggrieved. ‘I only wanted to ask her to dance the boulanger. I know I’m not that good a dancer, but no one has ever burst into tears before when I asked them.’

Nick eyed the firmly closed leaves of the sitting-out-room door, a faint and uncharacteristic line forming between his brows. ‘I suspect she thought you were about to propose.’

‘Propose? Propose what?’ William crooked a finger at a passing waiter, secured a glass of champagne, then choked on the first sip. ‘Not marriage?’

‘Hmm.’ Was that what Tallie thought? That there was a family plot for one of them to marry her because she had been compromised and if she did not marry him, then his cousin would step into the breach?

He regarded William, who was coughing indignantly, and administered a sharp slap on the back. ‘Stop that racket. Is it so surprising? I’ve been dinning into her the fact that she has been compromised and will have to marry someone.’

‘Well, why isn’t she marrying you?’ William enquired in a whisper, casting a hasty glance round to see if anyone had noticed their conversation. ‘You compromised her. And she’s in love with you.’

‘What?’ Nick thundered, fortunately under cover of the opening chords of the boulanger, then dropped his voice hastily. ‘Of course she isn’t. If she were, she wouldn’t have turned me down.’ Or given me such an effective summing up of my thoroughly unsatisfactory character, he thought grimly. His mind flinched at the memory of her bitingly expressed opinions—cold, controlling, aloof, amused at the antics of lesser mortals. Apparently pleasant enough to kiss.

William gave an unmannerly snort of disbelief. ‘The pair of you are going about like April and May, for goodness’ sake!’ Nick regarded him incredulously. ‘Very well, not quite like that, I suppose, but one can feel it in the air when the two of you are together. A certain something.’

‘What you can feel is irritation on my part and wilful bad temper and obstinacy on hers.’ And enough erotic attraction to light kindling, Nick ruefully acknowledged. Could Tallie possibly be in love with him? Surely not, or why on earth refuse him? He shook his head as though shaking off an irritating fly. William was hardly a connoisseur of the tender passions—paying him any heed on the subject was madness.

And if anyone was running mad it was Nicholas Stangate, Lord Arndale. He had given himself two weeks to change Tallie’s mind and now he was even further from understanding that mind than he had been at seven o’clock that morning. Damn it, was it only that morning that she’d lain in his arms, in his bed? He felt his body tightening at the memory and trampled ruthlessly on the recollection of soft, warm, naked … ‘Boiled fish.’

‘What?’

God, he was losing his mind if that was the best he could do to conjure up the most unerotic thought possible. ‘Never mind, I was thinking aloud. Best go and find Aunt Kate and tell her Tallie is not feeling well. She’ll probably want to take her home.’

William began to weave his way through the guests. Nick was vaguely conscious of him leaving, but his eyes stayed on the closed door of the sitting-out room. Provokingly independent, charmingly outrageous, worryingly courageous. All those descriptions fitted Talitha Grey. Marriage to her would certainly never be boring. His involuntary smile faded at the memory of the handkerchief she had held to her eyes as she vanished into the room. He had never seen her cry before, surely? Oh, yes, he had, he recalled with a pang of conscience. Once when he had knocked the breath out of her and once when some sharp remark he had made had caused her eyes to fill with bravely suppressed tears. At the thought of her distress something tightened hard in the pit of his stomach. Had he been harassing her? Pushing her too far? Or was it just that the last twenty-four hours were enough to undermine the spirits of anyone, however resolute?

Tallie sniffed resolutely and waved away the sal volatile that Miss Harvey, a fellow débutante, was helpfully attempting to press into her hand. ‘Thank you, no, I am quite all right. It was just that someone stood on my toe—so very painful! I quite thought he had broken it, and my eyes were watering. No, no, I assure you, you are most kind …’

Would the wretched girl never go away? Tallie wiped her eyes, smiled with more than a hint of gritted teeth and at last, thankfully, Miss Harvey turned away, only to swing round at the door with renewed offers of assistance.

‘No, nothing you can do. So kind of you …’ And it was kind, Tallie acknowledged to herself. And poor William had probably meant nothing more than to ask her to dance, or if she wanted a drink. Her nerves were on edge, she was overtired, that was all. In the morning after a good night’s sleep all would be in proportion again. Nicholas would accept his congé with good grace, Aunt Kate would stop worrying and she could slip away down to Putney to see Zenna’s proposed schoolhouse for a few days’ peace and quiet. Then she could return and spend the last weeks of the Season enjoying herself before slipping quietly out of Society for ever.

‘Talitha dearest, whatever is the matter!’ It was Lady Parry, all of a flutter, waving aside the attendant and seizing Tallie’s hands in hers as she plumped down on the sofa next to her.

‘Nothing, Aunt Kate, I am just a little tired, that is all.’

‘I should never have agreed to this madcap scheme of Nicholas’s, not so soon after … after last night. You must be emotionally drained, you poor child. Come along, I have told William to order up the carriage; we’ll send it back for the men later and they can stay and play cards and flirt to their hearts’ content. Why they do not flag with exhaustion I do not know—I am quite worn out.’

‘Possibly because you do not stay abed until past noon the next day, ma’am,’ Tallie suggested lightly. She would raise the idea of a trip to Putney on their way back, then she could try to sleep, at least knowing that was settled.

Clucking under her breath at the indolent and dissipated ways of modern young men, Lady Parry swept Tallie out of the sitting-out room and scanned the crowds. ‘Goodness knows where Agatha Mornington has got to—probably flirting with the Lord Chief Justice.’

‘Surely not?’ Despite herself Tallie was entertained at the thought.

‘Well, they do say she had an affaire with him in their youth,’ Lady Parry confided, then recalled to whom she was speaking and added firmly, ‘All silly gossip, of course. Now, where has William got to?’

At length the ladies found themselves safely in their carriage, Tallie having found the opportunity for a rapid whispered apology to William. ‘I am so sorry I was short when you tried to speak to me, I am just so tired this evening.’ The effect of her green eyes, still swimming with unshed tears, was more than enough to reduce him to a stammered assurance that he had noticed nothing, nothing at all out of the way, and of course she must be tired.

Lady Parry disposing her furs, reticule and fan about her on the broad expanse of green velvet, was less easy to fob off. ‘You poor child! What a dreadful couple of days you have had of it.’ Although Tallie could not see her face, she was aware of a shift of mood, a sharpening of interest. ‘Now, has Nicholas had the opportunity to speak to you?’

‘Yes, ma’am.’

‘And?’

‘And what, ma’am?’

‘Has he proposed to you?’

‘Lord Arndale has kindly explained to me that I am ruined, hopelessly compromised and must marry him, yes.’

‘And?’

‘In the face of such a tender declaration I felt no compunction in declining,’ Tallie replied, somewhat more tartly than she had intended.

‘Oh, foolish boy! I had no thought that he could express himself so badly! What on earth is he about? When I consider how much address he has …’

‘Possibly too much, dear ma’am. I think Lord Arndale expects the weaker sex to fall in at once with whatever he proposes, whether it is a walk in the park, the best place for their investments or his opinion on their marriage prospects. I, however, do not choose to dance to his lordship’s tune and, as I have already explained to him, I have no intention of marrying and never have had.’

‘But, Talitha, do consider …’

‘I agree, dearest Aunt Kate, that I am indeed compromised. Should I be intending to marry, it would put me in the most delicate of situations for I would need, in all honour, to confess everything to a prospective husband. And,’ she added with a wry laugh, ‘I suspect he would remain a contender for my hand for not a moment after hearing that confession. But I have not the slightest desire to take a husband, so it does not arise.’

‘Oh, Tallie, how can you not wish to marry? And Nicholas is the most eligible of men.’

‘Why, certainly, ma’am, if one is concerned only with title, wealth, intelligence, looks and a ready address. I am foolish enough to wish only for a husband, be he ever so humble, who loves me and tells me so. I am most unlikely to find such a soul mate, and his lordship, to do him justice, does not perjure himself with false declarations of emotions he does not feel.’

‘Oh, dear,’ Lady Parry said dismally. Even in the fitful light cast by the flambeaux as they passed Tallie could see her shoulders droop. ‘This is not what Miss Gower and I dreamed about for you.’

‘You thought that I should marry Lord Arndale?’ The words were out before she could help herself. Surely the two ladies could never have dreamed that their protégée would attach the interest of the eligible Nicholas Stangate, Lord Arndale?

‘Well, you always seemed so … different, so independent.’ Lady Parry was obviously struggling to articulate what the two friends had plotted so deviously. ‘And Nicholas is inclined to be so cool and so much in command of everything. We thought—’ she broke off in confusion ‘—we thought you would do him good, shake him out of that control, make him enjoy himself.’

‘I would have thought,’ Tallie said drily, ‘that Lord Arndale was more than capable of enjoying himself without any help from us.’

‘You mean his mistresses and so forth,’ Lady Parry remarked, apparently rendered indiscreet by the darkness. Tallie felt incapable of enquiring what so forth meant. ‘Well, of course, but there too he is in control. By all accounts he is perfectly fair, very generous, but he needs shaking up a little in my opinion.’

‘Well, I doubt if being turned down by me will be an adequate shock,’ Tallie observed. It was a most peculiar sensation, having this intimate discussion about Nick in the dark. It was almost like talking to herself and it most certainly did not feel real. ‘I must confess, Aunt Kate, I did overhear you both discussing his marriage plans. Being turned down by an eligible young lady would, I imagine, administer the appropriate salutary shock. Being spurned by a shockingly eccentric milliner is unlikely to do more than sting his pride.’

‘Oh, dear.’ Lady Parry sighed. ‘I appear to have made a mull of everything.’

‘Do not say so!’ Tallie impetuously moved to sit next to her patroness and hugged her. ‘I have had a lovely time, truly. And I could not have hoped for a warmer welcome than you and William have given me. It is an experience I will always treasure, but I am not cut out for this sort of life. If you will allow me, may I borrow the carriage to go down to Putney tomorrow to stay with Miss Scott? She thinks she has found the perfect house for her school and wants me to approve it.

‘If I stay perhaps a week, then Lord Arndale will forget all this nonsense about having to marry me and I can come back and finish the Season, if you will allow.’

‘Of course you may have the carriage.’ The vehicle drew up outside the house as Lady Parry spoke and she continued as the groom helped her down. ‘And of course you must finish the Season. I cannot imagine how I am going to get along without you; I have had so much pleasure from your company.’

‘And I from yours, dearest adoptive Aunt.’ Tallie kissed Lady Parry on the cheek as they stood in the hall, blinking in the light of the many-branched candelabra that Rainbird had set on the side-table. ‘Thank you so very much.’

Tallie managed to escape the next morning with her portmanteau without an encounter with Nicholas—who, as she had predicted to Lady Parry—had kept to his room until noon. Had Tallie known it, her haste to escape was quite unnecessary. His lordship was far too old a hand at games of cat and mouse to press his suit so soon after the ball. He partook of a leisurely luncheon before strolling round to Clifford Street to visit his tailor, then made his way to his club and passed a pleasant afternoon apparently immersed in the news-sheets and keeping half an ear open for gossip about Mr Hemsley’s fall from grace.

His quarry, meanwhile, sank back against the squabs with a sigh, which might have been either relief or regret, and watched the bustling street scene as it passed. How long was it since she had counted every penny before considering whether to take a hackney carriage? Not so many weeks, and here she was taking for granted the luxury of a private carriage with liveried servants at her beck and call.

Tallie took a firm grip on her imagination, which was wistfully conjuring up images of a certain grey-eyed gentleman, and thought fondly of dear Miss Gower, whose kindness had led her to pluck an anonymous young lady out of her genteel poverty and establish her in comfort and elegance. The smile that curved Tallie’s lips at the memory of the doughty old lady faded as she wondered how many other young women the City held who were forced to make their own way in a hostile world, most of them without the benefits of upbringing and education she had received.

The germ of an idea began to form as the carriage drove into the country near Little Chelsea; by the time it had reached the village of Fulham her eyes were positively sparkling. Yes! This is what I can do … Tallie knew next to nothing about the advanced theories of education that Zenna held so dear, but she did know what sort of start in life an impoverished young woman needed, and it was not just young ladies fallen on hard times who required help.

The pretty view of the Thames from Putney bridge passed unnoticed, and when the coachman drew up in front of the tall double-fronted house just off the High Street in Putney Tallie was so lost in thought that the groom had to cough to draw her attention to the fact that he had been patiently holding the door open for her for some moments.

‘I am so sorry,’ Tallie apologised, stuffing her tablets and pencil into her reticule and jumping down. ‘I had an idea. Zenna! Have you been watching for me? I am sorry not to have given you more notice.’ The friends embraced, then Tallie allowed herself to be shown into the house.

‘What do you think of it?’ Zenna asked anxiously. ‘The country air is so pleasant, and it is not too far from town, I thought …’

‘Is it big enough?’ Tallie demanded, staring around her with furrowed brow.

‘Big enough? But I was worried that you would think it too big!’ Zenobia broke off, torn between relief and puzzlement. ‘There are two wings at the back that do not show from the road. I had thought perhaps a dozen young girls and a dozen older ones. There is ample room for that and for classrooms and rooms for the assistant mistresses, a dining hall, a suite of rooms for me and servants’ rooms. The kitchens are rather antiquated, but a new close range and a little work and they will be perfectly acceptable.’

‘No, it needs to be bigger.’ Tallie took her friend’s arm and began to march towards the stairs. ‘Can we manage to accommodate another dozen or so girls? Not fee-paying ones, but poor girls who would benefit from a good education? And a suite for me as well.’

‘Well, there is room, we might have to do more work on the left-hand wing, I suppose.’ Zenna dug her heels in and they stopped abruptly at the foot of the stairs. ‘But who is going to pay for these girls? And why do you want a suite of rooms? Surely you are going to marry Lord Arndale?’

‘I am going to pay for them and, no, I am not going to marry Nicholas or anyone else. I am ruined and I intend to devote myself to the education and advancement of deserving girls.’

Chapter Twenty-One

‘Ruined?’ Zenna squeaked. ‘How? Who by?’

‘Really, Zenna,’ Tallie chided, starting to climb the stairs. ‘Do you not mean “by whom”?’

‘You know perfectly well what I mean,’ Zenna said fiercely, running to catch up. ‘I suppose it was Lord Arndale, and why are you not marrying him? You might be … I mean …’

‘Expecting a child?’ Tallie stopped on the landing and surveyed the doors opening off it. ‘This will need some redecoration, will it not? No, I am not in any danger of that. It appears that one can be quite effectively ruined without any of the supposed pleasures one might expect in the process.’

‘Talitha Grey!’ Zenna stopped dead in front of her and wagged a finger. ‘Stop sounding flippant and as if you do not care. I know you better than that, remember. Why will you not marry Lord Arndale, for goodness’ sake? You are in love with the man after all.’

‘But he is not in love with me,’ Tallie replied briskly. ‘And I have no intention of finding myself married to a man who will be making the best of things by regarding me as a cross between an unpaid housekeeper, a hostess for his entertaining and a brood mare.’ She paused and added with a rueful smile, ‘And not necessarily in that order!’

‘Tallie! I am certain Lord Arndale would never—’

‘Oh, he would be perfectly charming, I am sure, and I would live a life enriched with every comfort and elegancy.’ She broke off to push open a door. ‘These rooms are very spacious for the second floor, are they not?

‘The children would be a joy, of course,’ she added somewhat absently, ‘although I would prefer it if their father had married me because he loved me, not first and foremost because he had compromised me.’

They had arrived at the end of the corridor and Tallie started to climb the narrow stairs in front of her. ‘Where does this go?’

‘To the attics and down to the kitchens. Tallie, do stop and come and sit down and have some luncheon and tell me why you will not marry his lordship. What has upset you so?’ Zenna regarded her friend’s set face. ‘Now, this minute, Tallie! Or I swear I will write to Lord Arndale and demand to know what he has done to you.’

Miss Zenobia Scott was not given to making threats she would not carry out. Tallie allowed herself to meet her friend’s eyes for the first time that day and smiled ruefully, finding it difficult to prevent her lip quivering.

‘Very well, Zenna,’ she capitulated meekly, following her down the twisting servants’ stair to the ground floor.

‘Mrs Blackstock is staying with her cousin, but the lady kindly lent me two of her maids so that I could stay here for a few days and assess the house better. The owner is proving so co-operative that I think he must be having trouble disposing of such a large establishment. That gives me hope we can drive a hard bargain.’

She tugged the bell-pull and spoke a few words to the maid who appeared in answer. ‘There, something will be ready in ten minutes. Now sit down, Tallie, please, and tell me what has occurred.’

Taking a deep breath, Tallie repeated the tale she had told Lady Parry the day before. It was easier the second time round and without Nick there it was considerably less embarrassing. She was also far more frank with her friend about exactly what had happened when she awoke in Nick’s bedroom.

‘Oh, my goodness,’ Zenna said weakly, her eyes round with shock. ‘And his lordship did not …’

‘No.’

‘Goodness,’ she repeated. ‘I would have thought that his lordship is quite … er … that is, he is very …’

‘Very,’ Tallie agreed drily.

Zenna digested this for a moment. ‘And he does desire you?’

‘So it would seem. But then, most men appear to have very passionate desires. It means nothing in particular to them. It is certainly no basis for a marriage.’ Tallie turned to her friend, suddenly fierce. ‘I have no intention of sharing my husband with his mistress, however much Society may turn a blind eye to that sort of behaviour.’

‘It appears to be almost expected in Society marriages,’ Zenna agreed sadly. ‘But are you so sure he does not love you?’ She bit her lip, obviously searching for some hopeful comment. ‘Perhaps he is shy and … no, perhaps not.’

‘I cannot imagine the circumstances in which Nicholas Stangate would be shy,’ Tallie said with a smile at the thought. ‘Besides, he tried every argument to point out to me just how necessary this match is. If he loved me, surely that was when he should have told me?’

‘You would think so, but men are unaccountable beings,’ Zenna mused, breaking off at a tap on the door. ‘That will be luncheon ready. We will serve ourselves, so we can continue talking.’

The meal was set out in a charming parlour at the back of the house, giving Tallie the opportunity to admire the garden.

But Zenna was not to be diverted. ‘So how have you left things? Surely you cannot avoid meeting Lord Arndale if you are continuing to reside with Lady Parry?’

‘He has wagered me that I will agree to marry him within two weeks of yesterday.’

‘He is very sure of himself!’

‘He is indeed, which is why I want you to promise me that you will not admit him here if he calls. A few days’ peace will allow me to think about how I can best dissuade him from this.’ Zenna looked doubtful, but Tallie persisted. ‘Promise me, Zenna!’

‘Very well,’ her friend agreed. ‘Beside our friends and tradespeople, I will admit prospective parents only.’

That provoked a laugh from Tallie. ‘Come now, Zenna! Even for someone as confident as you, that is carrying expectation too far, is it not?’

‘It is not impossible,’ Zenna retorted, passing a plate of ham across the table. ‘I have confided my intentions to a number of people and I do think this house will prove suitable. Now, tell me more calmly about this idea of yours to admit young women of no means. How can we afford it?’

‘I will pay their fees. We cannot take many, I quite realise that, but even a few who leave with the skills to manage their own small business, or become governesses or companions—surely that is better for them than struggling in poverty when they have the intelligence and the spirit to do better for themselves?’

Zenna looked thoughtful. ‘Yes, you are right. Think what a difficult situation you or I would have been in if we had tried to make our own way in the world with no education.’ She delved into her reticule for the set of tablets and pencil that inevitably accompanied her. ‘This has given me much to think about and will change some of my calculations.’ She sucked the end of her pencil thoughtfully. ‘How many girls do you think we should start with?’