“Devon excels at pitching our services to big business. You drive the creative side.” She couldn’t understand why he didn’t see that the two of them needed each other. “That gives the company balance.”
“But I’m not interested in balance.” He shot images in fast succession as the bird dived to the water. “I don’t care about generating the biggest possible bottom line. I care about challenging myself and finding new outlets that interest me. That’s what keeps art vibrant. That’s what puts our business on the cutting edge.”
Setting the camera on the seat between them, he turned toward her, giving her his undivided attention.
“But the business shouldn’t be all about you,” she said softly. The company had grown rapidly in five years, and they now had satellite offices around the country. They were talking about going global.
She’d climbed the ladder fast at her job, and she owed much of that to how quickly Salazar Media had expanded.
“Why not? It was my brainchild. My work that started it. The company wasn’t meant to be a business opportunity for the whole family, just an outlet for my art. Now I can afford to buy my brother out.” He leaned closer, warming to the topic. “I’m done compromising my vision for his.”
In the river, a fish jumped and splashed in the slow-moving water.
“Salazar Media isn’t just you and Devon anymore. There are whole offices full of employees whose livelihoods would be hurt if you scaled back.” She wondered if he’d thought this through.
“You think I should let Devon buy me out of Salazar Media and start over on my own?”
That’s what he’d taken away from her comment? She’d never met anyone who thought like him before.
“Of course not. You’ve earned a strong reputation and the respect of industry professionals. You wouldn’t want to walk away from that.”
“Which isn’t a problem for someone who doesn’t care what other people think, remember?” He leaned back against the door, studying her from farther away. “Maybe you’ve got too much in common with my brother to understand that. You’re a people pleaser, too.”
She stiffened.
“It’s not a matter of pleasing others.” She wasn’t sure why they were talking about her. She wasn’t the one threatening to break up the family business. “But I do care how my choices affect others.”
“An artist can’t afford to care about that. I have to be impervious to criticism in order to keep creating art.” His knee bumped hers as he shifted, reminding her of that keen awareness she had for him. “I have to passionately believe in my choices in spite of what anyone else says.”
“That makes sense.” She crossed her ankles, giving him more room. Only to be polite, of course, and not because she was worried about the way his touches affected her. “But you don’t need to become so completely self-absorbed that you discount the preferences of others.”
“But creating work that I’m proud of requires me to be relentlessly honest with myself.” His dark eyes seemed to laser in on hers. Challenging her. “If the court of public opinion fell away, and there was no one else in the world to approve or disapprove of what I’m doing, would I still make that same choice?”
His gaze seemed to probe the depths of her soul as he spoke. As though his words, somehow, applied to her.
The people pleaser.
“If you’re suggesting that Devon and I both make our decisions based on larger factors than personal desire, I couldn’t agree more. Your brother tries to do what’s best for Salazar Media.” She felt defensive. Of herself. Of Devon.
“What about you, Lily?”
“I don’t own a stake in the company,” she reminded him.
“I realize that,” he said, more gently. “Consider it a hypothetical question to help put yourself in my shoes.” He stared out at the Bitterroot River again, perhaps sensing that the conversation was getting under her skin. “If you weren’t worried about other people’s opinions, would you still make the same choices?”
No.
The answer was immediate. Definitive. Surprising her with its force.
She had made so many decisions based on people’s expectations of her that it would be difficult to point to those few that she’d made purely for herself. Though her job was one of them.
Still, she would never be able to discount what her grandparents wanted. They’d raised her, taking her in when her mother had quit caring about her. And she would always owe them for that.
But she couldn’t deny that she may have given them too strong of a voice in her future—in everything from her job and her education to, yes, her pick of fiancé. That didn’t make it a mistake, did it? They wanted what was best for her.
In the quiet aftermath of Marcus’s question, she didn’t like the new lens he’d given her to view her own decisions. Because what she saw through his eyes was not the woman she wanted to be.
The autumn breeze off the water suddenly brought a deeper chill, and Lily was grateful when Marcus turned the vehicle back toward the ranch.
Three
Just because Marcus had made a valid point didn’t mean she needed to reassess her whole life, did it?
Lily wrestled with his words while she repacked her bags late that night, determined to fly back to New York despite Devon’s insistence that she remain in Montana. Devon might be the person she reported to in the New York office, but his directives held equal weight with his brother’s since they were copresidents. And Marcus wanted her gone. Hadn’t he made that clear from the start? She’d just have to tell Devon that she’d received an order contradicting his. Another reason why the brothers needed to settle their battle themselves.
But that wasn’t her problem. She couldn’t stay here when Marcus had deliberately caused her mental anguish. Accusing her of spying. Stirring an unwelcome attraction.
And then, to top it all off, intimating she’d chosen her fiancé for convenience. For ease. Because Eliot checked all the right boxes.
Not that Marcus had said it in so many words.
She rolled her socks together, lining them up in neat pairs along the bottom of her suitcase, taking no comfort from a ritual that usually helped her feel more in control before she traveled.
“Damn you.” Stressed and out of sorts, she chucked the final pair of socks at the steer horns mounted above the queen-size bed in her suite.
Was she cursing herself? Marcus? Her fiancé, who hadn’t answered the last three messages she’d left for him? She didn’t even know. But it bothered her that Marcus’s words resonated so deeply inside her, even hours after their talk at the river’s edge.
She needed to get away from him and all the feelings he stirred. That had been half the reason she’d started packing. But would that even do any good?
Truth be told, Marcus Salazar didn’t know much about her or her life outside work. He certainly didn’t know anything about her romantic relationship. So she needed to take some ownership of the fact that she’d interpreted his words today as some kind of judgment about her engagement. She’d pulled the meaning out of that conversation.
Which meant…
She was the one with doubts.
Her knees folded, and she dropped down to sit on the edge of the bed.
Staring down at Eliot’s ring on her finger, Lily wondered how long she’d been questioning her decision to marry a man who’d always been more of a friend to her than a romantic partner. Maybe that’s why neither of them had been able to commit to a date. Why it had always been easy to extend their time apart from each other, the way Eliot had done the day before. Perhaps her initial acceptance of four more months apart was another important clue that he was not the right man for her. And that was something he needed to know sooner rather than later. No delays.
She needed to call Eliot again. And keep calling until she got through. Because the engagement had gone on long enough. It was time for them both to move forward with their lives and give up the pretense that a marriage was ever going to happen. She hoped he would see that, too, because she truly didn’t want to hurt him. They’d been friends for a long time before the engagement, and she hated the idea of causing a friend pain. But she knew this was the right thing to do. She slid the heirloom diamond off her finger and placed it on the nightstand, at peace with her decision.
Picking up her phone, she hit the button to contact him through the video call app.
He answered on the first ring, his dark blond hair and gray eyes flickering to life on the screen. “Just the woman I wanted to speak to. Hello, Lily.”
He wore a tuxedo shirt and black bowtie, though he looked thoroughly rumpled as he sat in an unfamiliar setting. A hotel lobby, perhaps? She saw a few other people in the background, but no one else was dressed like him. His eyes were sleepy and a little unfocused, reminding her it was roughly five in the morning on his end of the world. Was he just returning to his hotel? The dark shadow of bristle on his jawline suggested as much.
Nerves surged as she paced a circle around her suite.
“Hi,” she managed after an awkward pause, surprised to have him suddenly on the line. “I really need to talk to you.”
“Are you upset that I had to extend my stay here?” he asked wearily. “You know I can’t ignore my dad’s wishes when it comes to this stuff.” He plucked at his bowtie, loosening the knot that had already been crooked.
“I’m not upset, Eliot,” she assured him, pausing her pacing to ensure her video image was still and focused on his end. “But I’ve been thinking about our engagement. About our mutual willingness to delay it inevitably. And I really think it’s a sign that we need to call it off.”
He seemed to shake off the weariness, his gray eyes widening as he leaned forward in the seat and shoved a hand through his hair.
“End the engagement?” he asked, a new urgency in his voice, still wrestling with the knot in his tie.
“Yes.” She knew it was the right thing to do, but her stomach tensed anyway. “I’m so sorry to do this long-distance but—”
“What about the merger?” he blurted, forgetting all about the bowtie as he gestured with his hand. Then, as if hearing the way that sounded, he shook his head. “I mean, as much as it hurts to think about ending the engagement, we have more at stake here than just our personal happiness.”
Frustration mingled with wariness and a touch of wounded pride. But, in all that tangle of emotions, she felt relief that “heartbreak” didn’t seem to be an issue for either of them.
“I realize that.” Releasing a pent-up breath, she sank into the window seat, careful not to crush the drawn damask curtains. “But marriage is too big of a commitment for us to make it just for business reasons.”
“We make a great team, though, Lily.” His gaze shifted to something beyond his phone. Or someone. Because he held up a finger as if to say one more minute to a person she couldn’t see. His gaze flicked back to her. “We should at least consider other options before we walk away from the engagement.”
A hurt deeper than wounded pride surprised her. Perhaps it was because Eliot didn’t seem remotely concerned about the loss of love or companionship in his life—just the merger. Maybe he’d never felt anything deeper for her than friendship and fondness.
It didn’t help matters that her intuition told her he was gesturing to a female companion. Not that it mattered now.
“Either we want a real marriage or we don’t.” Lily articulated the argument she’d been having with herself—quietly—for months. “After this conversation I feel certain that you’re not any more ready for that step than I am.”
In the background, she heard a woman’s tinkling laughter. Eliot glanced up in the direction of the sound—aggravated—before refocusing on Lily.
“Lily, please—”
“Rest assured, I’ll return the ring next week. And I’d like to wait until then to break the news to our families.” She wouldn’t keep a priceless family heirloom. Especially from a man whose interest in her seemed more mercenary by the moment.
“They’re not going to be happy with this decision,” Eliot warned her. “Not your family or mine.”
“Which is why I’m going to wait to discuss it with my grandparents until I’m back home next week.” Swallowing hard, she didn’t want to think about that talk yet. “Thank you for understanding.”
“I’m not sure I do.” His eyes went back to whomever he was with. “I’ve got to go, though, Lily. We can talk about this later.”
“That won’t be necessary,” she assured him, grateful to have the conversation over. “Goodbye, Eliot.”
She felt no guilt about punching the disconnect button. If he was actually with a woman, Lily was a little surprised he’d taken the call at all. But she was relieved, more than anything, to have ended things with him.
As Lily felt the weight of the engagement fall away, a new burden settled on her shoulders. Eliot was right that her grandparents were going to be upset with her. Disappointing them was something she’d avoided her whole life, and she knew without question that they would disapprove of the broken engagement. Furthermore, a little voice in the back of her head reminded her, they definitely wouldn’t be happy about how this might endanger the merger of the family businesses.
As she shut off her phone for the night, she began unpacking her suitcase. Maybe staying in Montana a little longer wasn’t such a bad idea. Just until she figured out how to handle things on the home front.
It wasn’t that she was hiding from them. Just…weighing her options for the future. Besides, she had a job to do at Mesa Falls Ranch. If things really fell apart with her family and the worst happened—if they disowned and disinherited her the way they did her mother—then Lily would need her job more than ever to pay her bills and secure her future. So right now, keeping Salazar Media intact seemed like the best use of her time.
Even if it meant facing Marcus again.
Enjoying the access to the stables at Mesa Falls Ranch, Marcus found himself on horseback for the third time in as many days. He’d attended a private boarding school where his father had taught, and horses had been an integral part of the program. Incoming freshmen bonded over a three-day trail ride, and the students’ relationship with the school’s animals grew from there. Every day at the Dowdon School, there’d been riding.
So he was comfortable enough on the Appaloosa as he filmed video footage of a team stringing a portable electric fence on a new patch of pasture for the ranch’s cattle. Besides, this excursion took him away from the main lodge, where he’d be sure to run into Lily. To hedge his bets, he’d left at dawn again, shadowing the ranch manager all day.
Coop had explained that moving the animals more frequently, to smaller patches of grass, was a key element in the green ranching model. In the years that Mesa Falls had been adhering to the practices, they’d seen a strong increase in the health of the grasslands and the wetlands. This model involved changing the grazing areas and, of course, stringing fence a whole lot more often. Marcus was filming whatever parts of the process interested him.
When his cell phone vibrated, he shut off the camera and grabbed for it fast, seeing it was a call from his brother. He’d left messages for Devon an hour ago, following up on a long email he’d sent the day before about the paperwork their father had left for them.
“Any idea what the hell kind of papers Dad would have left with a Montana ranch owner instead of giving to his lawyer?” Marcus asked, not even bothering to say hello first.
“I wish you’d come straight to the point for a change,” his brother deadpanned. “But no. I don’t have a clue. And it seems strange—even for Dad—to keep the whole thing a secret.”
“He was so careful laying out all his wishes for divvying up the property and his assets.”
Devon gave a sarcastic laugh. “He had to be, since he knows you and I don’t spend more than five minutes in a room together unless a client is involved.”
In the background of the call, there were shouts and horns honking, completely out of sync with the yellowed field surrounding Marcus, where the only sounds he heard were dry grasses rustling in the cold air and the creak of saddle leather.
“Maybe the papers pertain to his mystery business,” Marcus mused. “And we’ll finally learn something about his unidentified sources of revenue.”
Although Alonzo Salazar had taught English literature at the high school level, he’d always had a lifestyle that suggested he had a sideline, even long before he collected a paycheck with his sons’ company.
“If the will didn’t reveal anything, there’s no way some musty papers in Montana are going to contain any surprises. It’s something more sentimental. A letter to his grandkids or something.”
The idea punched him in the gut, since Marcus had zero intentions of marrying, let alone fathering children. He’d seen firsthand how fast a family could disintegrate.
“No matter.” Despite his father’s failings, Marcus hated to think he’d died disappointed. But Devon was the last person he’d share his regrets with. “At least this explains why he made us promise to come to the ranch together. Clearly it’s something he wants us both to learn at the same time.”
“I’m working on getting there, believe me,” Devon muttered. “In the meantime, can you lay off Lily? She does a hell of a job for the company, and she’s got enough on her plate without you making her feel unwelcome.”
Marcus wondered how tough the life of a pampered Newport heiress could be, but he didn’t voice that thought.
“I’m giving her a wide berth. I can’t promise I’ll do more than that.” He was doing her a favor by staying away, remembering how he’d gotten under her skin the day before. He genuinely hadn’t set out to make judgments about her or her life when they’d gotten into the discussion at the river’s edge. But he’d seen in her eyes when he’d struck a nerve.
All the more reason for him to let her be.
“While you’re at it, you could stop accusing her of spying for me. If I wanted some kind of secret updates on you, I think I’d send someone who doesn’t…stand out as much as Lily.”
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