The Rancher's Return

Chapter Two

“I want to have a party,” Lena said, putting three slices of bacon on Donovan’s already overflowing plate. He’d awakened at the crack of dawn and gotten dressed to help his father with morning chores. His mother had been awake, as well, humming as she bustled around the kitchen. She’d always made a hearty breakfast for them, but this was above and beyond anything she’d prepared in the past.

“What kind of party?” Donovan asked then held up a hand preventing his mother from adding fried ham to his plate.

“For the neighbors and the people of Sweet Briar. I want to let everyone know that you’re back home.” Lena sat and began eating her own food. “Maybe we can have a cookout this weekend.”

Donovan chewed for a while, pondering how best to turn down his mother. He understood her enthusiasm, but he wasn’t ready for that kind of interaction with the community just yet. Actually he would prefer not to make a big deal of his return. He’d rather handle people one-on-one as he encountered them. “Maybe later. I’m not really up to seeing the whole town right now. I’d like to settle down a bit and spend time with my family and closest friends for a while.”

“I’m just so happy you’re home. I want to tell the whole world.”

“I’m not saying keep it a secret. You can tell anyone you want. I just don’t want to be around a whole lot of people right now.”

His mother sighed, disappointed.

“Lena, let the boy settle in first,” Mario said, patting Donovan’s mother on the hand. “Think of this time as ours alone. And in the meantime you can plan the biggest party this county has ever seen for when he is ready.”

“All right,” Lena conceded, to Donovan’s great relief. “A good party will require planning.”

They talked more as they ate. When Mario finished eating, he stood and Donovan did, as well. He’d spent the past ten years as a paid hand on other people’s ranches. He’d worked hard, earning every cent he’d been paid. It felt good to work just as hard on land that belonged to his family. “See you at lunch.”

Donovan worked beside his father and the ranch hands. He only recognized one or two of them from before he’d left. The rest his father had hired over the years. Mario paid a fair wage and expected his men to earn it. It was only after he’d been on his own and working for others that Donovan appreciated the way his father managed his employees.

After dinner Donovan felt restless. He tried to fight it, but after a few minutes of an intense internal battle gave up. He needed to see Raven. Grabbing his keys and hat, he told his parents he’d be back later and drove up the road to the Reynolds’ property. For all he knew, she could have moved away as her older brothers had. Or as much as he hated the thought, she could be married with kids. He should have asked his parents. Well, it was too late now. If she no longer lived there, her parents could tell him how to get in touch with her.

Though each of the ranches was a decent size, the ride by truck only took ten minutes. During that short drive, Donovan recalled the last time he’d seen Raven. They’d met at their special spot. She’d been anxious to tell him something and he hadn’t been able to determine whether she’d been excited or scared. His friend Billy had been home on leave from the army and he’d phoned Donovan before Raven could share her secret. He’d been willing to stay with her, but she’d encouraged him to hang out with his friend. He’d promised to come to her house later so they could talk. Then he’d witnessed the murder and his life had been irrevocably changed. If he could turn back time, he would have stayed with Raven.

Over the years, when he’d been especially lonely for home, he’d wondered what Raven had wanted to tell him. He’d imagined all sorts of things but doubted he’d ever come close to the truth. He supposed he could ask her now but he wouldn’t. Ten years had passed. Though the moment had been indelibly marked in his mind, he doubted it was the same for her. For all intents and purposes, his life had ended when he’d left town. Hers had not.

He pulled into the circle drive in front of the large ranch house where Raven had grown up. Unlike his parents, the Reynolds had made changes to their home. The porch swing where he and Raven had spent many pleasant evenings had been replaced by dark brown wicker furniture with floral pillows. A wooden chest with a padded top was centered in front of the love seat.

As he waited for someone to answer the door, it occurred to him that this was the second time in as many days that he was standing on someone’s porch waiting to tell them he was alive. For a moment he thought about leaving, but decided that ten years was long enough to go without seeing Raven. Besides, no matter how she found out, she was going to be shocked. And he’d missed her too much to wait. Over the years he’d dated other women, but he’d never given his heart to any of them. He’d been living a lie and hadn’t been in a position to be honest with anyone without risking their lives, too. If he’d had to leave town suddenly, he couldn’t have taken anyone with him. He hadn’t wanted to risk the pain of separation again. Though time had passed and his feelings had faded, Raven was the only girl he’d ever loved.

The door swung open and there she was. Raven. His heart stuttered and all he could do was stare.

She was even more beautiful than he remembered. More beautiful than in his dreams. Tall and skinny when they’d been teenagers, she’d filled out and now had slim curves. Her straight black hair hung over her shoulders, gently caressing her breasts. But it was her face with her big brown eyes, high cheekbones and full lips that captivated him.

“Hi. Can I help you?” Though she looked at him quizzically, she smiled.

His breath caught in his throat and he lost the power to speak. Over the years he’d imagined seeing her again and thought of what he’d say. How he’d feel. But he’d underestimated the emotion that would consume him as he finally came face-to-face with the girl he’d loved. His vision blurred and he blinked away the moisture in his eyes. Time had intervened and he no longer loved her the way he had at nineteen, but there was still an unnamable something there. A connection that had compelled him to see her even though she’d surely moved on with her life.

“Sir? Are you okay?”

Donovan had no idea how much time had passed but it had been enough to arouse her concern. “Raven.”

She gasped and looked at him. Really looked. “Don—Donovan?”

“Yes.”

The color drained from her face and she froze. Then her entire body began to shake. She reached out her arms and slowly began to sag to the floor. Donovan stepped inside and managed to catch her before she hit the floor. He scooped her into his arms and carried her into the front room and lay her on her sofa.

How could he be so stupid? Showing up out of the blue was boneheaded and inconsiderate. After ten years without hearing from him, she had to believe he was dead. He should have anticipated this kind of reaction. Even his mother, who’d never given up hope that he’d return, had nearly fainted with shock at the sight of him.

He should have let his mother throw the party like she’d wanted. That way nobody would react as if they’d seen a ghost when they saw him. He’d told his mother she could tell whomever she wanted that he was back, but he didn’t know who she’d told so far. Not that it mattered now. Clearly the word hadn’t reached Raven.

Her hair had fallen over her face and he brushed it aside then watched, waiting for her to come around. After a minute her eyelashes fluttered and she began to stir. She opened her eyes and stared right at him then lifted her hand and touched his face. “It’s really you.”

“It’s really me.”

She pushed herself into a sitting position then scooted around and put her feet on the floor. She was still wobbly although her color was returning.

“Easy.”

Raven reached out and wrapped her arms around him. He inhaled her familiar scent. She smelled of outdoors and sunshine with a slight hint of lavender soap. He closed his eyes and simply enjoyed the feel of her. Although their bodies had changed and matured over the past decade, she still fit perfectly in his arms.

After a moment she pulled back slightly and looked into his eyes. The joy he saw in her gaze was unmistakable. “When did you get back?”

“Yesterday. Dinnertime.”

She touched his face again as if trying to convince herself that he was real. “You came back yesterday?”

He nodded.

“Where have you been all this time?”

“Working on ranches in Texas.”

“But you never called. You never came back.” She sounded confused. Hurt.

He could imagine that she felt angry and betrayed, among other things. At least that’s what he would feel in her position. He’d known this wasn’t going to be an easy conversation, but it was more difficult than he’d expected. The heartbroken expression on her face seared his soul.

“I’m back now.” He wished he had the words to take away her pain but he didn’t think they existed. He wanted to tell her the truth, but she was so shaky he didn’t think she could handle the shock of discovering her life had been threatened. He would tell her the truth when she was stronger.

She snorted. “That’s all you have to say? You’re back now?”

She pushed to her feet then stumbled. He immediately grabbed her elbow to steady her. Her weakness only steeled his resolve to protect her. A body could only take so much and obviously she couldn’t handle another emotional blow now.

“I guess. It’s good to see you.”

She jerked away. “You need to leave. Now.”

“Raven.”

“Do you have any idea how worried I was? How scared? The entire town searched for you day and night. Jericho, Tony and Billy drove back and forth to town for weeks looking for clues that would help us find you. Your parents put up fliers. The church held fund-raisers to raise money for a reward. They raised twenty-five-thousand dollars for information. Mr. Rivers contributed twenty-five-thousand dollars so we would have a fifty-thousand-dollar reward.”

Donovan stiffened at Karl Rivers’s name. That old hypocrite, pretending to care about Donovan. No doubt he thought it was best to keep track of what was being done to find him. Not to mention it made him look good. Having a good public image made it that much easier to do his dirt in the dark. That and owning politicians and controlling law enforcement.

“Do you know how many nights I couldn’t sleep because I was worrying about you? Praying for you? I cried for months. I had to force myself to eat because of... I was devastated. Everyone kept telling me that you were dead, but I didn’t believe it. I kept hoping you would come back to me. As time passed without a word, I figured you must have been hurt. That was the only reason I could think of that you wouldn’t return to me. I promised God that I would take care of you if he’d only bring you back. And all the time you’ve been fine. You could have come home if you’d wanted. You just didn’t want to.”

“That’s not true.” He hadn’t meant to justify his actions, but hearing her speak as if she hadn’t been his entire world was unbearable. He would have sacrificed his life to come back. He just hadn’t been willing to sacrifice hers.

“Were you in prison? In a coma? Held hostage?”

He’d been held hostage but not in the way Raven meant. His love for her and his family had made it impossible to return as long as Karl Rivers lived. But as soon as the news of the man’s death reached him, Donovan had been freed from his captivity. He’d barely stopped to sleep or eat on his race to get home.

“Well?” Raven pressed.

There would be no reasoning with her tonight. Not unless he was willing to shock her further by telling her about the threat to her life. He didn’t want to win the argument that badly.

“No. I was none of those things.”

* * *

Raven forced herself not to cry at Donovan’s words. She thought of all the years she’d spent hoping he would come home. She’d never believed he would leave her without a good reason, so she’d figured something had to be wrong with him. There just had to be a reason he hadn’t returned to her. She’d tried to put herself in his mind and come up with an explanation for his prolonged absence. As time went on, her reasons became more desperate.

Perhaps he’d been badly injured. Maybe he’d been disfigured or paralyzed and thought she wouldn’t love him any longer. But she’d love Donovan no matter what. She’d prayed that God could reach him wherever he was and help him to know that.

Other times she’d imagine he had amnesia and had forgotten who he was and where he belonged. She’d searched online for stories about young men found without identification and police looking for help from the public. Over the years she’d read about three or four such cases, but none had been the man she’d loved with her whole heart and soul. She’d been dying inside, and he’d been fine and dandy, living his life in Texas.

How could he do that to her? And his parents? The Corderos had been destroyed. With the passage of time, they’d become more distraught, barely able to care for themselves. After a while other people moved on with their lives, putting Donovan’s disappearance in the past as a mystery that might never be solved. Mr. and Mrs. Cordero had been the only ones who’d shared Raven’s belief that Donovan would one day return.

“Did your parents know where you were?” It would be awful to think that they’d betrayed her the way he had.

“No. No one knew where I was.”

“Well, at least I know you were just as cruel to them as you were to me.”

“Don’t cry, Raven. I didn’t come here to hurt you.”

She angrily wiped at tears she hadn’t realized were falling. “Then why did you come?”

He seemed to mull that over. That was different. The Donovan of her youth had been impulsive and fun. A daredevil, he’d act first and think later. He’d changed. And not just his personality.

He was physically different, too.

Ten years ago he’d been tall and lanky. Being a ranch kid, he’d been physically strong even if he hadn’t had the muscles as evidence. He was still the same height, probably six feet two or three, but his shoulders were broader and his chest was fuller, yet his stomach was just as flat, his waist as trim. If his muscular body was anything to go by, whatever he’d been doing had been physical. His brown skin glowed with good health and his eyes were clear and sharp as ever. From all appearances, he’d lived well this past decade.

That thought pierced her soul. He could have returned to her and had chosen not to. Instead he’d been living the good life in Texas. Not that she’d wanted him to have suffered. The thought of him in agony somewhere was more than her heart could take. But knowing that he’d left her in misery for ten long years when he hadn’t had to shred her heart. She would never forgive him.

And to think she’d dreamed of this moment for years. None of her imaginings had looked like this. And they certainly hadn’t hurt like this. Nothing could ever hurt this badly. “You need to leave. Now.”

“I’m sorry for hurting you. I hope we can become friends again.”

Friends? Not likely. She hated him. If she never saw him again, it would be too soon. As far as she was concerned he could disappear forever. He’d kept his existence a secret for years. If he wanted to keep secrets...well she could do the same. “No. We’re done.”

She heard the pounding of feet a second before she heard the voice. And then she knew she wouldn’t be able to keep her secret after all.

“Mom?”

Chapter Three

Mom? Donovan reeled at the word. Did Raven have a child? A husband? Although he’d told himself he wanted her to have moved on and made a happy life without him, the thought that she’d fallen in love with another man sucked the air from his lungs. He didn’t even try to reconcile the two opposing feelings. Emotions weren’t logical and it would be foolish to try to make sense of them.

He turned to see a boy of about eight or nine standing there looking straight at Raven. When she didn’t answer him, he directed his attention to Donovan. “Who are you?”

Donovan opened his mouth to answer but when he met the kid’s eyes he couldn’t speak. His stomach seized as if he’d been punched in the gut. The kid’s eyes were the exact shade of gray as the ones that stared at Donovan from the mirror each morning as he shaved. The same gray eyes Donovan had inherited from his father. Realization dawned fast and Donovan’s knees buckled. This boy was his son. Raven had been pregnant and he hadn’t known it. Was that what she’d planned to tell him that last day?

“Who is he, Mom?”

Donovan wanted to blurt out that he was his father but he didn’t. That would be selfish. For all Donovan knew, Raven was married and the kid might believe his stepfather was his dad. Was Raven married? Donovan looked at her left hand. No ring. Not that the absence of a wedding band meant anything. She could have taken it off to do work around the ranch. Or maybe she’d simply forgotten to put it on this morning. There were any number of reasons to explain why Raven wasn’t wearing a ring.

Raven glanced at Donovan before smiling at the boy. “This is Donovan Cordero. He’s Mr. and Mrs. Cordero’s son and a friend of mine.”

“Mr. and Mrs. Cordero are nice.” His eyes lit up and he took a step closer to Donovan. “Are you the guy who disappeared?”

Donovan managed a nod.

“Wow. Where were you? Why didn’t you come home?”

“Elias. Enough with the questions. What did you want with me?”

Elias grinned and a dimple flashed in his left cheek. Donovan also had a dimple in his left cheek. It was like seeing himself at nine years old. “I wanted to tell you there’s going to be a carnival in Sweet Briar this weekend and ask if you want to go with me.”

Raven smiled. “If I want to go with you? That’s a pretty sneaky question since I don’t remember saying you could go.”

“Oh, Mom. All the kids are going. Please.”

“I’ll decide after I see the grade on your math test.”

“Mom.”

Raven cut off Elias mid-grumble. “I need to talk to Donovan. Go start your homework.”

“Okay.” The boy took two steps then turned back around and grinned at Donovan. “Welcome home.”

“Thanks,” Donovan said but the kid had already sprinted from the room.

Neither Raven nor Donovan spoke for a minute. Donovan was in a state of shock and incapable of forming a coherent sentence. The world had completely tilted and he was struggling to get it back on its axis. Adding the new revelation to the emotional upheaval of the past five days had left him emotionally wrung out. He tried to grab hold of his rapidly shifting emotions but couldn’t get a handle on even one of them. Two thoughts kept circling his mind. I have a son. And he doesn’t know who I am.

He blew out a breath and then looked at Raven. Though she’d managed to hold it together while Elias was in the room, she was trembling again. She looked as weak as he felt.

He reached out a hand to her. “Raven.”

Her eyes filled with tears as she met his gaze. “What?”

“He’s mine, isn’t he? Elias is my son.” Although he’d known the second he’d seen the child, he needed to hear her say it.

“Yes.” That softly spoken word changed his entire life. He was a father.

He smiled. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For having my son. You didn’t have to. I know it couldn’t have been easy for you.”

Surprise had her deep brown eyes widening. “You’re not upset?”

“Upset? No. Why would I be?”

“Because.” She gave a nervous laugh. “I don’t know. Back then I was so afraid you’d be angry at me for getting pregnant. I worried you might think I was trying to trap you. I guess that feeling popped up now because... I don’t know.”

Donovan was angry. But not at Raven. She’d given him a son. He was angry at Karl Rivers. Because of him Donovan had been a father for nine years and not known it. He’d missed watching Raven grow bigger as their child grew within her and then holding her hand as she’d given birth to their son. He’d missed every day of his son’s life. All because of Karl Rivers.

Anger at the man consumed Donovan and nearly bubbled over. He suppressed it. He couldn’t let his fury show. If he did, Raven would believe he was angry at her.

“Are you married?”

“What?”

“Are you married? Do you have a husband? Other kids?”

Raven took two steps and got in his face. Her eyes flashed with fury although he couldn’t imagine why she was angry. It was a logical question. “You have your nerve. You vanish, leaving me pregnant and alone and out of my mind worrying about what could be happening to you. And you were fine. You could have come home anytime. You could have called to let me know you were alive and well. But you didn’t care enough about what I was going through to do that. So you don’t get to know about my life. It’s none of your business.”

“It is, too, my business. Elias is my son. If some other man is around him, I have a right to know.”

“A right?” She sputtered and her hands fisted. He’d never known Raven to be violent but a lot could have changed in ten years. Even though he doubted her personality had changed that much, he didn’t want to test that theory, so he took a step back.

“Yes. I’m Elias’s father.” Raven sucked in a breath and Donovan spoke quickly before she could get wound up again. “I’m not saying this the right way.”

“No kidding.”

“Let me try again. I’m still in a state of shock here, so if I’m fumbling for words, I apologize.”

“You’re not the only one. I’m reeling myself.”

“I’m grateful to you for having my son. For raising him. I don’t know enough words to tell you how much. But he’s my son, too, and I want the opportunity to be a part of his life. I want to get to know him. Spend time with him.”

She shook her head. “So you think you’re just going to waltz back into town and into Elias’s life and act as if you haven’t been missing in action for the past decade? Is that what you’re saying?”

“I know I haven’t been a part of Elias’s life, but I want to be. I’m back now.”

“For how long?”

“I’m staying.”

Raven put a hand on her forehead. He wished he could know what she was thinking but maybe it was best that he couldn’t. His head was so full that he didn’t think he could hold another thought. “I haven’t seen or heard from you in ten years, Donovan. Ten years. Surely you don’t expect me to just let you hang out with my son. I don’t trust you that much. Or at all, really. For all I know, you could take my son and vanish for another ten years.”

“Our son. And no. I don’t expect you to let me take him places. At least not yet. But I do want to get to know him.”

She paced the room for several stressful minutes. Finally she looked at him. Her expression was firm, her eyes steel. “I’m not going to tell him who you are right now. That’s not debatable.”

Donovan was disappointed at Raven’s pronouncement but squashed the urge to fight with her. She already harbored animosity for what she believed was his callous disregard of her feelings. Arguing with her over this wouldn’t help. So he’d allow her to make the rules for now. Besides, it might be easier to get to know Elias if he didn’t know Donovan’s true identity. He might resent Donovan for being absent all of his life. It might be better to build a relationship than to tell Elias the truth. That way, if Elias was upset, they would have established a bond, making it easier to deal with his feelings.

“Okay.”

“And another thing. You aren’t going to be alone with Elias. If you’re with him, then so am I. Again, that’s not negotiable.”

Donovan nodded, keeping himself from smiling. He’d often thought of Raven over the years. On those endless, lonely nights when he’d longed to come home, memories of time they’d spent together kept him going. Though he’d never stopped hoping he’d be able to come home one day, he’d never let himself believe he and Raven would ever be together again. Now she was insisting on it. He knew she wasn’t saying they spend time together because she missed him or wanted to take up where they left off. She didn’t trust him. Still he was anticipating the next few days and weeks. “Okay. So when can I see him again?”