“Nothing.” He shrugged. “I’m in no hurry to get married. I’ll wait to see if anyone else answers my ad.”
“Oh, okay.” She nodded.
Neither spoke.
“Leah.” Abby chose that moment to appear at the door. Leah looked over at her sister. “We’d better get on home or Mother’s going to wonder where we are. She may even send out a posse or the cavalry looking for us,” Abby said with her usual dramatic flair.
“What time is it?”
Jake pulled out his pocket watch and told her the time.
“Sweet twinkling stars above. Abby’s right.” Leah scooted her chair out. “I’ve got to go. Mother will be worried.”
Abby darted down the steps. Banjo followed her, leaping and hopping at her heels.
“Meant to ask you, where’d that expression come from, anyway?” Jake asked, following her out. “You’re the only one I ever heard say it.”
“Say what?”
“‘Sweet twinkling stars above.’”
“Oh, that.” Her face lit up. At the edge of the porch she gazed up at the sky. “When my father was alive, many warm summer nights we’d grab blankets and go lay outside. Father used to tuck me under the crook of his arm and we’d stare up at the stars. Father used to say that back in New York you couldn’t see them as clearly as you could here. He even made up a song about sweet twinkling stars above and used to sing it to us.”
“How’s it go?”
Leah turned her attention onto him, then to where Abby was, near the phaeton playing with Banjo.
“Sweet twinkling stars above; there to remind us of our Heavenly Father’s love. Each one placed by the Savior with care; as a sweet reminder that He will always be there. Oh, sweet twinkling stars above. When my children gaze upon you remind them, too, of my love. Each twinkle is a kiss from me; a hug, a prayer, a sweet memory. Oh, sweet twinkling stars above.” Leah stopped singing in the softest, sweetest voice he’d ever heard. One filled with reverence and joy. And yet, her face now only showed sadness. “Okay. Now you know. And I need to get going,” she blurted as if her tongue were on fire, and down the steps she bolted.
Jake caught up to her and they walked side by side until she reached her carriage. She stopped and faced him. All of a sudden, something barreled into her backside and sent her flying forward. Her face smacked into a firm wall. Her arms flung out, clutching onto something solid. Something warm. Something very muscular.
* * *
Jake stared at the top of Leah’s head plastered against his chest. Her hands clung to his upper arms as he caught and held her there. He froze in place and the air around him suddenly disappeared. Having her this close to him, her hands touching him and her head so near his heart, caused his pulse to buck and kick like an untamed horse. That had never happened to him before. Course, she’d never touched him that closely before, either. Still. What was going on?
“Um, Jake, could you help me up, please?”
Jake blinked. “Oh. Yeah. Sorry.” As soon as she was steady on her feet, he released her.
“What just hit me, anyway?” Leah ran her hands over her skirt.
“Meanie’s what hit you,” Abby said from behind Leah.
Abby had Jake’s pet goat by the collar, yanking it away from her sister.
“Meanie! How’d you get out?” Jake grabbed the goat’s collar and tugged her close to his leg. The animal stretched her head toward Leah and started gnawing on her skirt.
Jake yanked the cloth from the nanny’s mouth and tapped her on the tip of the nose. “Stop that, you ornery old goat.” Meanie latched onto Jake’s fingers and shook her head fast and hard.
Banjo barked and bit Meanie in the backside. The goat chomped down harder on Jake’s fingers. Jake struggled to pull them away while simultaneously holding the goat and knowing he looked like a blooming idiot. “Down, Banjo!”
The dog immediately dropped onto his belly.
Jake tugged, trying to free his now-throbbing fingers. One more yank and they were free. Shaking his hand, he glanced over at Leah. “Gonna hang that brother of yours. Should have never let Michael talk me into taking this goat off his hands.”
Leah covered her mouth with her hand and her eyes crinkled into a smile.
“Go ahead and laugh. We both know you want to.”
Her laughter pealed across the farmyard. It only took a second before he and Abby joined her.
With a hard jerk on his arm, Meanie broke free and took off in the direction of Mabel’s house. Banjo ran after her, nipping her heels and dodging the goat’s quick kicks.
“Oh, no! Not again.” Jake darted after them, hollering over his shoulder, “See you ladies tomorrow. Got a dog to stop and a goat to catch.”
Their laughter followed him.
It took a quarter mile, but he finally caught up with Meanie and the dog, corralled them both and headed back to the house. He fully expected Leah and Abby to be gone, but they weren’t. Keeping a tight hold on Meanie, he walked up to Leah’s rig, panting from the exertion. “Something wrong?” he asked between gasps of breath. He struggled to keep the nanny from breaking free again.
“You said you would see us tomorrow, but I can’t come by tomorrow.”
“Won’t be here even if you did.”
“Huh?” Leah tilted her head in that charming way of hers.
“Guess Michael didn’t tell you, then.”
“Tell me what?”
“Starting tomorrow, I’ll be working for him.” He jerked on the goat’s collar to keep her under control.
Leah’s eyes widened. “Y-you are?” She glanced around his spread and then turned her attention back onto him. “But who’s going to take care of your place?”
“Only gonna work part-time, until Smokey gets back from taking care of his folks’ affairs and Michael feels comfortable leaving Selina home with the twins. Can you believe it? Michael. A father? To twins?”
“It’s hard to picture Michael a father. But I’m so happy for my brother and Selina. It’s hilarious watching him with those babies. Every little whimper and he rushes to their cradles. Selina has to almost wrestle him to the ground to keep him from picking them up all the time. He’s paranoid to leave them and Selina alone.
“Mother, Abby and I promised him we’d help, but with Lottie Lynn and Joseph Michael only a few days old, he doesn’t want to leave them or Selina. And if he does, it’s only for a minute or two. I can understand that.” She looked at Jake and her smile lit up her whole face. “I’m glad you’ll be at the ranch, though. It’ll be fun having you around.”
Jake’s insides grinned at her announcement. Maybe being a hired hand on the Bowen ranch just might be a fun thing after all.
Chapter Three
Leah removed her coat and scarf, hung them up on a wooden coat tree near the front door of her house and looked around. Dinner was on the stove waiting to be heated, everything was sparkling clean and the laundry was finished. With Abby still outside and her mother only who knew where, the house was so quiet that the only sound she heard was the grandfather clock ticking. Knowing she was alone and that she wouldn’t have to wait until later to read her letters, her spirit skipped with excitement. She darted toward the stairs.
“Where are you off to in such a hurry?” Mother’s voice stopped her.
Masking her disappointment for the delay in reading her posts, she put her reticule on the step and turned toward her mother. “Hi, Mother. Sorry, I didn’t see you.”
“Of course you didn’t. I was in my room until I heard the front door. Did you have a nice time in town today?”
“I had a wonderful time.” Soon Mother would know just how wonderful of a day Leah really did have. Right now, however, she had to keep that information tucked inside those hidden, secret compartments in her mind. When the time was right, she would tell Mother of her plans.
Arm in arm they went to the living room and sat down. Mother crossed her legs in Leah’s direction. “Were you and Abby able to help Phoebe get everything finished for her wedding?”
“Yes, we did. Oh, Mother, Phoebe’s gown is so pretty, and she looked so beautiful in it. Markus will absolutely love it.”
“I’m sure he will. I wish you could find a nice man like Markus. Anyone caught your eye yet?” Eagerness and hope brightened her mother’s beautiful face.
“No. Sorry, Mother. Not yet.” But hopefully someone will very soon. She thought of the letters sitting on the stairs, waiting for her and calling out to her to come read them.
Mother patted her hand. “You will. God has someone special for you. I’m sure of it. When the time is right, He’ll bring the right man into your life. Unless He already has and you don’t know it yet.”
She tilted her head and frowned. That same strand of hair that always seemed to escape its pins fell across her cheek. She reached up and curled it around her ear. “What do you mean? Do you have someone in mind?”
Mother leaned forward. “Let’s just say I’ve been praying.” She reached for Leah’s hands and held them in her own, hands that were starting to show a few age spots and wrinkles. “Sweetheart, sometimes God places something right before our eyes but we don’t see it because we’re too busy looking somewhere else or for something else. Something that may or may not be God’s will for us.”
Did her mother know about her plans? No, she couldn’t because only Abby, Jake and Selina knew, and none of them would have said anything to her. Of that she was certain. The need to know what her mother meant hovered inside her until she could no longer stand it. “What do you mean, Mother?”
“I’m just saying that there are a lot of young men here who would make a wonderful husband.”
That was true. But the problem was they lived here, not in New York.
“What about Jake? You two seem to get along really well. You even entered the sack race at last year’s harvest party with him. He’s a nice man who loves the Lord. He’d make a wonderful husband.”
Her eyes snapped to her mother’s. “Mother, Jake is a nice man, but he’s not the one for me.”
“How do you know that?”
“I just know. Well, Mother—” Leah rose “—I’m sorry to end this conversation, but I have some things I need to do.”
The look on her mother’s face said Leah wasn’t fooling her, but she nodded and smiled. “I need to get busy, too. Just think about what I said, okay?”
“I will.” They hugged, then Leah headed up to her room. She removed the letters from her reticule and locked them in her nightstand before heading back downstairs and out the door where she planned on having a long talk with the Lord. After the conversation with her mother, she needed one.
* * *
Two hours later, after the dinner dishes were finished and the kitchen cleaned, Leah excused herself and went up to her room, shutting the door behind her. With one right turn of the passkey she locked the door, then tossed the key in her armoire drawer and quickly readied herself for bed. Against the headboard she propped up her pillows and settled herself on top of her lavender quilt. With a quick turn of the brass skeleton key, she unlocked her nightstand drawer, removed the letters, a pencil, and her Mr. Darcy diary and opened it up to the next blank page.
Dear Mr. Darcy, she penciled in as she had been doing ever since Rainee had given her the journal. Somehow Leah had felt silly just writing to her journal, but this way she felt like she was writing to a real, live person somewhere—someone who understood what she was going through. Someone who didn’t make fun of her. She thought about calling it her Dear Daddy diary, but that hurt too much, so she named it the next best thing after her father, Mr. Darcy.
Today, I was pleasantly surprised to see that I had received many letters to my advertisement. I can’t wait to read them, and I want you here when I do. My greatest hope is that I will find you in one of them.
For years I’ve dreamed of finding someone as wonderful as my father. You’re the closest thing to that. But you already know that, don’t you? I’ve shared it with you enough times.
I so desperately need to move. To escape the nightmares. I can’t take them much longer. They’re getting even worse and are coming more often. I just have got to find the peace I had before tragedy took Daddy away from me.
She grimaced.
Before the Idaho Territory took him from me.
Fresh anger roiled inside her.
I hate this place, Mr. Darcy! My father would still be alive if we hadn’t ever moved here. I miss him terribly.
She brushed away a tear, let out a long sigh and forced her shaking hand to continue.
I want to go back to New York. That’s why I placed an ad in the New York Times. I’m going to stop writing now so I can read my letters, but I’ll be back to let you know how they are. See you in awhile.
Love,
Leah
She set her diary off to the side and picked up the first letter postmarked from New York. Her heart raced as she tore open the envelope. Was this it? Was this the man who would make everything good again? She couldn’t wait to see.
Dear Madam,
I am answering your advertisement because I am in need of a wife. It is my father’s wish that I marry a woman who is willing to bear me many sons so as to continue the Hamlen name and lineage.
Leah felt heat rush into her cheeks. The man was rather forward with his mention of bearing children. Such an intimate detail for him to openly share. Most inappropriate. But then again, if that was his design in marrying, then she could understand why he would bring it up. Still, the very idea that he did made her uncomfortable.
With uneasiness squirming through her, she continued to read.
The women here refuse to submit to my authority, and I will not have that. I will say straightaway that I am a strict believer in the Bible and where it says that the man is the head over the woman and she is to submit to her husband. If you do not have a problem with being submissive to me and calling me Lord, then please contact me. If not, do not bother responding.
Signed,
Mr. Gregory Joseph Hamlen III
Leah laughed. No wonder the man was still single. What woman in her right mind would ever marry such a man as he?
She imitated Jake and tore the letter and envelope into pieces. After she did, she wished she hadn’t and instead kept it to read to Jake. “If he thought some of his letters were bad, well, this one topped any of his,” she whispered into the empty room.
Leah scanned through the pile of letters. One with precise penmanship snagged her attention. She looked at the return envelope and her heart skipped a beat. Sweet twinkling stars above! She clutched the envelope to her chest and looked upward. “Lord, is this a sign from You?”
Pulling her attention back onto the letter, she read the name on the return label again.
Fitzwilliam D. Barrington.
Fitzwilliam was Mr. Darcy’s first name. She wondered what the D stood for. Darcy? No. Surely not. That would be too weird, even for her. Brushing all those thoughts and the strand of hair that had fallen against her cheek aside, she flipped the envelope over and carefully ran her finger over the red waxed seal with the fancy script B insignia.
Dear Miss Bowen,
As I have just moved to the United States of America from England, I have not had the pleasure to make many acquaintances as of yet. The women I have met do not share your good opinion to travel and to explore the world. I must confess, your exuberant advertisement has quite intrigued me, and I must meet you. If it is agreeable with you, perhaps I could come on Tuesday next or within a fortnight to meet you. We could spend time getting acquainted to see if there could be a future for us together. If this is agreeable, then please send a post to me straightaway.
I hope to hear from you soon.
Sincerely,
Fitzwilliam D. Barrington
Relief drizzled over her. Mr. Barrington was willing to come here. She wouldn’t have to risk breaking her mother’s heart by traipsing off to New York by herself. She tossed everything from her lap onto the floor and rushed over to her writing desk.
Retrieving her best stationery, she dipped her pen in the ink well and penned her reply, making sure to use the swooping letters that looked so beautiful. Everything about this reply had to be perfect. After all, Fitzwilliam would make his decision about her and their future from it. Tomorrow she would take it to the post office. Bubbles of excitement popped through her. In her heart of hearts she felt she had at last found her very own Mr. Darcy who would come and whisk her away.
* * *
Jake saddled his horse and made his way to the Bowens’ house. No one would be expecting him for at least another hour, but he couldn’t sleep so he’d decided to head to their place early in hopes of seeing Leah. The morning nip brushed across him on a light breeze. He pulled the lapels of his wool coat tighter together, hoping the morning sun would soon penetrate the chilly air.
As he rounded the bend of pine trees nestled against the mountain leading to the Bowen ranch, his anticipation of seeing Leah caused his heart to beat erratically as he rode into their ranch yard. Leah had a way of making him feel special. He loved spending time with her.
He glanced toward the barn. There she was, sitting on a bench outside the barn door, petting Kitty, the family’s pet pig. Jake reined his horse in that direction. Leah raised her head and leaped up. Grabbing the ends of her light pink wrap together, she scurried toward him, her lavender dress swinging like a bell around her feet as she did. Her warm welcome made his heart smile.
“I was hoping I would catch you this morning. You won’t believe what I have to tell you.” She was practically bouncing on her feet.
“Morning to you, too.” He grinned.
There were those dimples again. Her eyes sparkled and her face shone brighter than the morning sun glistening off the dewdrops. Something had put that glow on her face. How he wished it was him, but he knew better.
“What won’t I believe?” He dismounted and stood in front of her. Kitty nudged her nose into the palm of his hand.
“Kitty, leave Jake alone.”
“She’s all right.”
“She’s a pest.” Leah leaned over and tapped the pig on the nose. “Aren’t you, girl?”
Kitty sniffed the air with her round snout. Jake patted her shoulder and gave a quick scratch behind her ears. Content with the attention, Kitty waddled slowly in the direction of the field blooming with purple camas flowers, no doubt to have her fill of camas bulbs. “That pig’s quite a character.”
“She sure is.” Leah laughed, then turned her attention from the retreating pig back onto him. “Come and sit down. I can’t wait to tell you my good news.” She grabbed his hand and pulled him along.
There was a lilt to her walk. The air around her rolled with joy. She let his hand go and he followed her to the same hewed-out bench she’d been sitting on when he’d arrived. After he tied his horse to a nearby hitching post, he sat down with her, careful to keep the appropriate amount of distance between them.
“Okay, bright eyes. What’s your good news?”
Her smile bracketed by those dimples was contagious, and he found his own lips curling upward.
“I think I found my husband.”
He wasn’t expecting that, and it took him a minute to gather his wits about him. “Oh, yeah?” He knew he should be happy for her. That it would happen someday. But the thought of losing his best friend made his gut twist into a painful knot.
“Yes. He moved from England to New York City and he wants to come here to meet me. I’m sending my consent today. I’m so happy. He sounds like just the type of man I’ve been looking for.” She went on and on oblivious to the pain her declaration was causing him. Pain he couldn’t articulate.
“Morning, Jake.” Michael’s voice drifted toward him from yards away. “I wasn’t expecting you here so early.”
Jake snapped himself together and stood. “Morning, Michael.”
Leah hopped up beside him. “What are you doing here?” she asked. “I thought you didn’t want to leave Selina alone.”
“I don’t. But she’s finally asleep now.”
“What do you mean, ‘finally’?” Leah tilted her head.
“The babies kept her up most of the night.”
Jake anchored his arms across his chest. Concern for a woman he’d come to greatly respect pressed through him. “How’s Selina doing?”
“Other than being exhausted, she’s doing well. Having twins is a lot of hard work. But Joseph and Lottie Lynn are sure worth it.” His eyes sparkled, then a wide yawn stretched his lips. It was then that Jake noticed the bags under Michael’s eyes.
“So, what are you doing here?” Leah inquired again.
“I wanted to show Jake what to do.”
“Can’t Haydon or Jess do that?”
“They could, but...”
“You know both Haydon and Jess are going to hang you for not trusting them to show Jake what to do,” Leah interrupted her brother.
Michael frowned. “It’s not that I don’t trust them. I wanted to be here to welcome Jake. To show him around and...”
They continued to talk about Jake as if he weren’t standing right there between them.
“Fine, fine. If you insist on being the one to show him what to do, I’ll run over and sit with Selina and the twins until you get back. I know that will help put your mind at ease and help you to relax a bit.”
“It sure will. Thank you, Leah. But don’t wake her or the babies. And don’t knock. Just open the door quietly and let yourself in.”
“Yes, yes, Michael.” Leah dragged out the words and rolled her eyes at her brother. “You worry too much. You really need to learn to lighten up.”
“Just wait until you have children. Then it will be my turn to tell you to lighten up.”
She shook her head and glanced over at Jake. “See you later, Jake.”
He gave a quick nod and watched her as she headed toward Michael’s house.
“You like her, don’t you?”
Jake yanked his attention to Michael. “Sure I like her. She’s been a great friend to me.”
“She’s more than a friend. I can see it in your eyes.”
Jake shook his head and waved Michael off. “The only thing you see in my eyes is respect.”
“If you say so, buddy.” The smirk on Michael’s face bugged Jake. Couldn’t a guy have a female friend without everyone making a big deal about it?
Best change the subject before Michael put together any more pieces that didn’t fit. “So, what do you want me to do?”
“Changing the subject, huh?”
“Michael.” Jake sent Michael a warning glare. “I’m here to help, not discuss my friendship with Leah. You want my help or not? Besides, thought you didn’t like leaving Selina alone.”
Worry crowded into Michael’s face immediately followed by determination. He glanced at his pocket watch. “Oh, man. I’ve got to hurry. I’ve been gone ten minutes already.”
“Ten minutes? That long, huh? We’d better hurry, then.”
“Okay, wise guy. Just wait until you become a father. Then you’ll understand. Come on.” He motioned for them to go inside the barn.
Jake hoped someday he would know exactly how Michael felt. Once again, he wished Leah hadn’t turned his marriage offer down. He knew she’d make a good wife and mother, and he admired her and respected her more than any other woman he knew.
Thoughts of Leah answering some strange man’s ad and inviting him there trailed through Jake’s mind. Would he be able to handle seeing his best friend hanging out with another man?
A man who could possibly become Leah’s husband and take her away from him?
God, give me the grace to let my friend go and to make it through this time. Make it a large dose. ’Cause I’m sure gonna need every ounce You can spare.
Chapter Four
Steps creaked under Leah’s feet. She cringed, hoping the noise wouldn’t wake Selina. Michael would give her a good scolding if she did. Of that she was certain. Quietly she opened the door and stepped inside. Her eyes popped open. She’d never seen Selina’s house this messy before. Never.