English Fairy Tales / Английские сказки. Elementary

The Three Sillies

Once upon a time, there was a farmer and his wife who had one daughter. And a gentleman courted this girl. He came every evening to see her and stopped to supper at the farmhouse, and the daughter went down into the cellar to bring the beer for supper. So one evening she went down to bring the beer, and she saw a mallet that was hanging on the ceiling. She did not notice it before. She thought it was very dangerous to have that mallet there, and she said to herself, “If we marry, and we have a son, and he grows up and comes down into the cellar to bring the beer, the mallet will fall on his head and kill him. How awful!” And she sat down and began to cry.

Her father and the gentleman were wondering upstairs where the girl disappeared, and her mother went down to look for[52] her. She saw that the girl was sitting and crying, and the beer was running all over the floor[53].

“What’s the matter?” said her mother.

“Oh, mother!” says she. “Look at that horrid mallet! If we marry, and we have a son, and he grows up and comes down into the cellar to bring the beer, the mallet will fall on his head and kill him. How awful! How awful!”

“Dear, dear! That’s really terrible!” said the mother, and she sat down and started to cry, too. Then the father began to wonder that they didn’t come back, and he went down into the cellar. They were sitting and crying, and the beer was running all over the floor.

“What’s the matter?” says he.

“Oh,” says the mother, “look at that horrid mallet. Just think: if our daughter and her sweetheart marry, and they have a son, and he grows up and comes down into the cellar to bring the beer, the mallet will fall on his head and kill him. How awful! How awful!”

“Dear, dear, dear! It is so dreadful!” said the father, and he sat down and started to cry, too.

Now the gentleman went down into the cellar too, to see what they were doing there. They three were sitting and crying side by side[54], and the beer was running all over the floor. And he ran and turned the tap.

Then he said, “What are you three doing? Why are you sitting and crying?”

“Oh!” says the father, “look at that horrid mallet! Just think: if you and our daughter marry, and you have a son, and he grows up and comes down into the cellar to bring the beer, the mallet will fall on his head and kill him. How awful! How awful!” And then they all started to cry worse than before.

But the gentleman smiled and took the mallet, and then he said, “I travelled many miles, and I never met such big sillies as you three before. Now I shall start my travels again, and when I can find three bigger sillies than you three, then I’ll come back and marry your daughter.” So he wished them good-bye and went away. The three sillies were all crying because the girl lost her sweetheart.

Well, he travelled a long way, and at last[55] he came to a woman’s cottage. It had some grass on the roof. And the woman was trying to get her cow to go up a ladder[56] to the grass. So the gentleman asked the woman what she was doing. “Look at all that beautiful grass,” she said, “I’m going to feed my cow with it.” “Oh, you poor silly!” said the gentleman, “you must cut the grass and throw it down[57] to the cow!”

Well, that was one big silly.

Then the gentleman came to an inn. In the morning he saw a strange man. He hang his trousers on the knobs of the chest of drawers[58] and ran across the room and tried to jump into them. At last, he stopped and wiped his face with his handkerchief. “Trousers,” he says, “are the most terrible kind of clothes in the world. Who could invent such things?! I usually spend an hour to get into my trousers every morning!” So the gentleman laughed, and showed him how to put the trousers on[59].

So that was another big silly.

Then the gentleman came to a village. Outside the village there was a pond, and round the pond was a crowd of people. And they had rakes, and brooms, and pitchforks, and they were piercing the water of the pond. The gentleman asked what was the matter. “Don’t you see[60],” they say, “Moon fell down into the pond, and we can’t catch it!” So the gentleman laughed and told them to look up into the sky and that it was only the shadow in the water. But they didn’t listen to him and abused him.

And he saw more and more sillies, even more than three. So the gentleman came back home again and married the farmer’s daughter. And if they didn’t live happily, that’s nothing to do with you or me[61].

The Old Woman and Her Pig

An old woman was sweeping her house, and she found a sixpence. “What,” said she, “shall I do with this little sixpence? I will go to market and buy a little pig.”

While she was coming home, she came to a stile, but the pig did not want to go over the stile.

She went a little further, and she met a dog. So she said to the dog, “Dog! bite the pig; the pig doesn’t go over the stile, and I shan’t get home tonight.” But the dog refused.

She went a little further, and she met a stick. So she said, “Stick! stick! beat the dog! The dog doesn’t bite the pig, the pig doesn’t get over the stile, and I shan’t get home tonight.” But the stick refused.

She went a little further, and she met a fire. So she said, “Fire! fire! burn the stick; the stick doesn’t beat the dog, the dog doesn’t bite the pig, the pig doesn’t get over the stile, and I shan’t get home tonight.” But the fire refused.

She went a little further, and she met some water. So she said, “Water, water! quench the fire; the fire doesn’t burn the stick, the stick doesn’t beat the dog; the dog doesn’t bite the pig; the pig doesn’t get over the stile, and I shan’t get home tonight.” But the water refused.

She went a little further, and she met an ox. So she said, “Ox! ox! drink the water; the water doesn’t quench the fire, the fire doesn’t burn the stick, the stick doesn’t beat the dog, the dog doesn’t bite the pig, the pig doesn’t get over the stile, and I shan’t get home tonight.” But the ox refused.

She went a little further, and she met a butcher. So she said, “Butcher! butcher! kill the ox; the ox doesn’t drink the water, the water doesn’t quench the fire, the fire doesn’t burn the stick, the stick doesn’t beat the dog, the dog doesn’t bite the pig, the pig doesn’t get over the stile, and I shan’t get home tonight.” But the butcher refused.

She went a little further, and she met a rope. So she said, “Rope! rope! hang the butcher, the butcher doesn’t kill the ox, the ox doesn’t drink the water, the water doesn’t quench the fire, the fire doesn’t burn the stick, the stick doesn’t beat the dog, the dog doesn’t bite the pig, the pig doesn’t get over the stile, and I shan’t get home tonight.” But the rope refused.

She went a little further, and she met a rat. So she said, “Rat! rat! gnaw rope, rope doesn’t hang the butcher, the butcher doesn’t kill the ox, the ox doesn’t drink the water, the water doesn’t quench the fire, the fire doesn’t burn the stick, the stick doesn’t beat the dog, the dog doesn’t bite the pig, the pig doesn’t get over the stile, and I shan’t get home tonight.” But the rat refused.

She went a little further, and she met a cat. So she said, “Cat! cat! kill the rat, the rat doesn’t gnaw the rope, the rope doesn’t hang the butcher, the butcher doesn’t kill the ox, the ox doesn’t drink the water, the water doesn’t quench the fire, the fire doesn’t burn the stick, the stick doesn’t beat the dog, the dog doesn’t bite the pig, the pig doesn’t get over the stile, and I shan’t get home tonight.” But the cat said to her, “If you go to that cow and fetch me a saucer of milk, I will kill the rat.”

So the old woman went away to the cow.

But the cow said to her, “If you go to that haystack and fetch me some hay, I’ll give you the milk.”

So the old woman went away to the haystack, and she brought the hay to the cow.

When the cow ate the hay, it gave the old woman the milk, and she went with it in a saucer to the cat.

When the cat lapped up[62] the milk, the cat began to kill the rat, the rat began to gnaw the rope, the rope began to hang the butcher, the butcher began to kill the ox, the ox began to drink the water, the water began to quench the fire, the fire began to burn the stick, the stick began to beat the dog, the dog began to bite the pig, the little pig in a fright jumped over the stile, and so the old woman got home that night.

Jack and the Beanstalk

There was once upon a time a poor widow who had a son named Jack and a cow named Milky-white. Every morning the cow gave the milk which they carried to the market and sold. But one morning Milky-white gave no milk, and they didn’t know what to do.

“What shall we do, what shall we do?” said the widow.

“Oh, mother, I’ll go and get work somewhere,” said Jack.

“We tried that before, and nobody took you,” said his mother. “We must sell Milky-white.”

“All right, mother,” says Jack. “I’ll sell Milky-white, and then we’ll see what we can do.”

So he took the cow’s halter in his hand and went to the market. While he was going, he met an old man who said to him: “Good morning, Jack.”

“Good morning to you,” said Jack and wondered how he knew his name.

“Jack, where are you going?” said the man.

“I’m going to the market to sell our cow there.”

“Oh, I have five beans,” said the man, “and let’s change[63]: your cow for these beans.”

“You swindler,” says Jack, “it won’t go![64]“

“Ah! you don’t know what these beans are,” said the man. “If you plant them over-night, by morning they grow right up to the sky[65].”

“Really?” says Jack. “I don’t believe you.”

“Yes, that is so, and if this is not true, you can have your cow back.”

“Good,” says Jack and gives him over Milky-white’s and takes the beans.

Jack came home happily.

“So what[66], Jack?” said his mother. “I see you don’t have Milky-white, so you sold her. How much did you get for her?”

“You’ll never guess, mother,” says Jack.

“Oh no! Good boy! Five pounds, ten, fifteen… Or twenty?”

“No, just look: five magical beans.”

“What!” says Jack’s mother. “My son is a fool, such a dolt! Oh my dear Milky-white! Take that![67] Take that! Take that! And your precious beans will go out of the window.”

So Jack went upstairs to his little room in the attic, and he was very sad. At last he began to sleep.

When he woke up, the room looked so funny. The sun was shining into part of it, and all the rest[68] was quite dark and shady. So Jack jumped up and dressed himself and went to the window. And what do you think he saw? The beans that his mother threw out of the window into the garden sprang up into a big beanstalk[69] which went up and up and up till it reached the sky. So the man spoke truth!

The beanstalk grew up quite close past Jack’s window, so Jack opened it and jumped on the beanstalk which was like a big ladder. So Jack climbed and he climbed and he climbed and he climbed and he climbed and he climbed and he climbed till at last he reached the sky. And when he got there, he found a long broad road. So he walked along and he walked along and he walked along till he came to a great big tall house, and on the doorstep there was a great big tall woman.

“Good morning,” says Jack politely. “Could you give me some breakfast?” He was as hungry as a hunter[70].

“You want breakfast, don’t you?” says the great big tall woman. “It’s breakfast you’ll be if you don’t go away.[71] My husband is an ogre, and he likes to eat boys broiled on toast.”

“Oh! please give me something to eat. I’m very hungry, really and truly,” says Jack.

The ogre’s wife was a kind woman. So she took Jack into the kitchen and gave him some bread and some cheese and a jug of milk. Suddenly, Jack heard a terrible noise: someone was coming.

“Oh, it’s my husband,” said the ogre’s wife, “what shall I do? Here, come quick and jump in here[72].” And she put Jack into the oven just as the ogre came in.

The ogre was really big. At his belt he had three pigs, and he threw them down on the table and said, “Here, wife, broil me a couple of these for breakfast. Ah! What’s this I smell?[73]”

“Nothing, dear,” said his wife. “Here, go and have a wash, and by the time you come back[74], your breakfast will be ready for you.”

So the ogre went off, and the woman told Jack, “Wait till he’s asleep; he always sleeps after breakfast.”

Well, the ogre had his breakfast, and after that he was asleep. Then Jack crept out from his oven, and while he was passing the ogre, he took one of the bags of gold under his arm and ran to the beanstalk. And then he threw down the bag of gold, which of course fell in to his mother’s garden. And then he climbed down and climbed down till at last he got home and told his mother and showed her the gold and said, “Well, mother, I was right about the beans. They are really magical, you see.”

So they lived on the bag of gold for some time. But at last the gold came to an end, so Jack decided to use the beanstalk again. So one fine morning he got up early and went to the beanstalk, and he climbed and he climbed and he climbed and he climbed and he climbed and he climbed till at last he got on the road again and came to the great big tall house. There was the great big tall woman.

“Good morning,” says Jack, “could you give me something to eat?”

“Go away, my boy,” said the big tall woman, “or my husband will eat you for breakfast. But aren’t you the boy who came here before? My husband lost one of his bags of gold that day.”

“That’s strange,” says Jack, “I can tell you something about that, but I’m so hungry I can’t speak.”

The big tall woman was very curious, and she gave him something to eat. But soon he heard thump! thump! thump![75] and the ogre’s wife hid Jack in the oven.

All happened as it did before.[76] The ogre said, “Wife, bring me the hen that lays the golden eggs.” So she brought it, and the ogre said, “Lay,” and it laid an egg of gold. And then the ogre began to sleep.

Then Jack crept out of the oven and caught the golden hen and went away. But this time he made some noise which woke the ogre. So the ogre woke up and howled, “Wife, wife, where is my golden hen?”

But Jack was running very fast to the beanstalk and climbed down quickly. And when he got home, he showed his mother the wonderful hen and said “Lay,” and it laid a golden egg every time he said “Lay.”

So they lived happily. But Jack was not content, and one fine morning, he got up early and went on to the beanstalk, and he climbed and he climbed and he climbed and he climbed till he got to the top. But this time he did not go to the ogre’s house. When he came near it, he waited behind a bush till he saw the ogre’s wife. She came out with a pail to get some water, and then he crept into the house and hid himself. Soon he heard thump! thump! thump! as before and saw the ogre and his wife.

“I smell the boy!” cried out the ogre. “I smell him, wife, I smell him!”

“Do you, my dear?” says the ogre’s wife. “It must be that little rogue that stole your gold and the hen that laid the golden eggs. He must be in the oven.” And they both rushed to the oven. But Jack wasn’t there, and they found nobody.

So the ogre sat down to the breakfast and ate it. After breakfast, the ogre called out, “Wife, wife, bring me my golden harp.” So she brought it and put it on the table before him. Then he said, “Sing!” and the golden harp sang most beautifully till the ogre fell asleep.

Then Jack crawled out and took the golden harp. But the harp called out, “Master! Master!” and the ogre woke up. Jack began to run very fast with his harp.

Jack ran as fast as he could, but the ogre followed him. When Jack got to the beanstalk, the ogre was not more than twenty yards away. The beanstalk shook with his weight[77]. Down climbs Jack, and after him climbed the ogre. By this time Jack climbed down and climbed down and climbed down till he was home. So he called out, “Mother! mother! bring me an axe, bring me an axe.” And his mother appeared with an axe in her hand.

Jack jumped down and took the axe and cut the beanstalk. The ogre fell down and died.

Then Jack showed his mother his golden harp, and it began to sing beautiful songs. Jack and his mother became very rich, and he married a princess, and they lived happily.

The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs, and the time came for them to leave home and seek their fortunes.

Before they left, their mother told them, “Whatever you do, do the best that you can because that’s the way to get along in the world[78].”

So three little pigs left their mother to find homes for themselves.

The first pig met a man with a bundle of straw. “Please, man,” said the pig, “will you let me have that bundle of straw to build my house?” “Yes, here, take it,” said the kind man. The little pig was very pleased and at once built his house out of straw[79] because it was the easiest thing to do.

The second little pig said goodbye to his mother and set out[80]. Before long[81] he met a man with a bundle of sticks. “Please, man,” he said, “will you let me have that bundle of sticks to build my house?” “Yes, you can have it, here it is,” said the kind man. So the second little pig was very pleased and built his house out of sticks[82]. This was a little bit stronger[83] than a straw house. Then last of all, the third little pig set out and met a man with a load of bricks. “Please, man,” he said, “will you let me have that load of bricks to build my house?”

“Yes, here they are, all for you,” said the kind man. The third little pig was very pleased and built his house out of bricks[84].

One night, the big bad wolf, who dearly loved to eat fat little piggies, came along and saw the first little pig in his new house of straw. The wolf knocked on the door and said, “Let me in, let me in, little pig, or I’ll huff and I’ll puff[85] and I’ll blow your house in![86]”

“No, not by the hair of my chinny chin chin,[87] I’ll not let you in!” said the little pig.

“Now I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow your house down,” cried the wolf.

And of course[88] the wolf did blow the house in and ate the first little pig.

The wolf then came to the house of ticks and knocked at the door. “Little pig, little pig,” he said, “open up your door and let me in!”

Now the second little pig remembered what his mother had told him, so he too said, “No, not by the hair on my chinny chin chin, I’ll not let you in.”

“Now I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow your house down!” cried the wolf. But the little pig went on saying, “No, not by the hair on my chinny chin chin, I’ll not let you in.” So again the old wolf huffed and he puffed and he huffed and he puffed, this time it was much harder work, but finally down came the house. The wolf blew that house in too and ate the second little pig.

The wolf then came to the house of bricks, and again he said. “Little pig, little pig, open your door and let me in!”

But like his brothers the third little pig said, “No, not by the hair on my chinny chin chin, I’ll not let you in.”

“Now I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow your house down!” cried the wolf. And when the third little pig wouldn’t open the door he huffed and he puffed and he huffed and he puffed an he tried again, but the brick house was so strong that he could not blow it down.

Well, the wolf huffed and puffed again and again, but he could not blow down that brick house.

This made the wolf very angry.

When he found that he could not, with all his huffing and puffing, blow the house down, he said, “Little pig, I know where there is a nice field of turnips.”

“Where?” said the little pig.

“Oh, in Mr. Smith’s home field, and if you are ready tomorrow morning, I will call for you, and we will go together and get some for dinner.”

“Very well,” said the little pig, “I will be ready. What time do you mean to go?”

“Oh, at six o’clock.”

Well, the little pig got up[89] at five and got the turnips before the wolf came (which he did about six), and who said, “Little pig, are you ready?”

The little pig said, “Ready! I have been and come back again, and got nice turnips for dinner.”

The wolf felt very angry at this, but thought that he would be up to the little pig somehow or other, so he said, “Little pig, I know where there is a nice apple tree.”

“Where?” said the pig.

“Down at Merry Garden,” replied the wolf, “and if you will not deceive me, I will come for you at five o’clock tomorrow and get some apples.”

Well, the little pig bustled up the next morning at four o’clock and went off for the apples, hoping to get back before the wolf came, but he had further to go and had to climb the tree, so that just as he was coming down from it, he saw the wolf coming, which, as you may suppose, frightened him very much.

When the wolf came up, he said, “Little pig, what! Are you here before me? Are they nice apples?”

“Yes, very,” said the little pig. “I will throw you down one.” And he threw it so far that, while the wolf was gone to pick it up, the little pig jumped down and ran home.

The next day the wolf came again and said to the little pig, “Little pig, there is a fair this afternoon. Will you go?”

“Oh yes,” said the pig, “I will go. What time shall you be ready?”

“At three,” said the wolf. So the little pig went off before the time as usual and got to the fair and bought a butter churn, which he was going home with, when he saw the wolf coming. Then he could not tell what to do. So he got into the churn to hide, and by so doing turned it around, and it rolled down the hill with the pig in it, which frightened the wolf so much, that he ran home without going to the fair. He went to the pig’s house and told him how frightened he had been by a great round thing which came down the hill past him.