Julia felt Harri’s hand sear her body and felt it tremble slightly. And then, because she couldn’t help it, because it was too much like bliss, she let her head arch back in ecstasy. Desire pulsed through her. She heard him whisper something in Welsh and let the husky words caress her – just as his hand was caressing her body from breast, over her stomach, to the where her legs met.
A beat began in the very core of her being, where Harri’s hand lay. God, she was turned on! If she didn’t have this man soon, she’d combust. Did he know the effect he had on her? She couldn’t help herself; she bucked against his hand, making it press more urgently against her sex.
“Good, good,” Daniel sounded surprised but pleased, “that’s a good line. Hold it, then lift her gently up Harri and bring her back to the standing position and be ready to break away … now!”
Julia found herself coming to without really knowing quite what had just happened. She was dizzy and her legs trembled. She still fizzed with unspent desire. Then she saw Harri breathe heavily and run a hand over his forehead, and she came back down to earth. He was sweating. Damn, she didn’t think she was that heavy!
Daniel looked at both of them curiously: “We’ll take a break now folks, but we’ve done some good work here this morning. Take twenty.”
“Good idea,” Harri mumbled and walked out.
Julia frowned at the towel she’d just picked up and muttered into it as she wiped her face: “I didn’t think dancing with me would be so much of a hardship for him.” She gazed up at Daniel in appeal. “I thought we got on so well.”
He passed her a fresh bottle of water. “I think that’s the problem, babe.” He nodded to the door. “Think our Welsh friend likes you more than just a little bit.”
“No!” Julia looked at him startled. “He can hardly bear to touch me. Today’s the first time anything like that’s happened and that’s only because you were coaching us.”
“Didn’t look like that to me. Think he’s gone to cool himself off, if you know what I mean.” Daniel gave her a bawdy wink and grinned. “Don’t sweat it – it made the dance hot, hot, hot!” He came nearer and swiped the bottle from her. “It’ll be a showstopper.” He saluted her with the water bottle and drank thirstily. Screwing his eyes shut, he clamped down on his own burgeoning feelings for Julia. He’d seen the longing in Harri’s face and knew he couldn’t, maybe didn’t want to, compete.
“Maybe he has to be careful,” he added. “You know, in his line of work. People can be funny about the image children’s television presenters give off. They have to appear a bit innocent, don’t they?”
“What, still, in this day and age?” Julia glared at him.
Daniel shrugged. “Well, maybe. It’s just a theory and Harri’s serious about his job. He said the other night how much it means to him.”
But Julia wasn’t really listening, she stared at the door through which Harri had exited so swiftly and wondered what he had just said to her in Welsh.
“So, what did you say to me?” They were sitting in the pizza place again. Neither of them really wanted yet another pizza, it was simply a quick way to refuel their starving and hard worked bodies. The place was again packed with people celebrating Christmas. This time, Mary’s Boy Child played on the sound system.
“What? When?”
“When we were doing the rumba this morning with Daniel.” Julia, disconcerted by Harri’s unusual disinterest, prattled on, mainly to fill the silence. “He was brilliant, don’t you think? So encouraging and kind. He’s exactly what I need. But what did you say in Welsh, during training?”
Harri looked down at his beer and reddened. “It was nothing.”
“No, it was something. What did you say?”
“I said …”
“It sounded beautiful. I had no idea the language was so beautiful. What did you mean?”
A large group in the back of the restaurant erupted into laughter and began a chorus of We wish you a merry Christmas. Harri’s eyes strayed to them and Julia thought she could see longing in his face. Was she really such dull company? “Well,” she said a little huffily, “if you don’t want to tell me I’m sure it’s not important.”
Harri flashed his eyes back to hers. “I said I loved you,” he said abruptly. They held one another’s gaze.
“Oh,” Julia spluttered. There was a silence and the remains of their easy friendship fled. “You were obviously, erm, just getting into the mood of the dance then.” She tried to say it without an ounce of hope or expectation.
Harri gave a huge sigh. “Yeah, that’s it.” He seemed deflated she thought. “Duw, I need another drink! Oh, look, it’s Abi again, wouldn’t you know it. Another Becks and more wine?” He busied himself with the order and the moment passed.
In the cab on their way home Julia tried to resurrect the companionship they’d shared by discussing Daniel’s coaching skills. But Harri remained taciturn and, as it was so unlike him, she too lapsed into silence. The atmosphere between them was as frosty as the weather outside.
Step Eight.
Quarter-final week. Of all the dancers who had started only Harri, Callum, Suni and, unbelievably, Julia remained.
The show had begun to hit the papers, with Julia’s story featuring prominently. As Lavinia said, it was all good publicity, even the focus on Julia’s appalling dancing, but Julia wasn’t happy being in the full glare of the tabloids. She and Harri remained friends but he continued to be distant with her. She blamed the increased publicity; she knew he had to be careful with any press coverage.
Daniel was as attentive as ever and, now that so many contestants had been voted off, it was good to find solace in his and Erica’s friendship. They often went out as a threesome and her cosy pizzas with Harri became a thing of the past. Harri’s position as favourite was slipping, the public were, in true British fashion, going for the underdog and Callum and Julia were increasingly tipped to win.
Julia, under Daniel’s kind and patient tutelage, was blossoming. She was in no way as good as Suni but was really improving; even Jan had muttered reluctant words of praise.
It wasn’t all rosy though. Now that Casey had left, Callum had fewer victims for his letching and Julia found herself constantly having to dodge his roving hands. Fortunately, Daniel acted as a type of bodyguard and had the ability to diffuse tricky situations with an enviable grace and skill.
Julia wondered about Daniel. He was a quiet man, incredibly lithe and good looking but always seemed to be on his own. She had no idea if he was straight or gay; he seemed almost asexual. But she enjoyed his company and appreciated his friendship.
Bob, the producer, decided to throw a Christmas party on the night before the quarter-final show. Everyone had been working hard and the atmosphere was increasingly tense. He’d hired a ballroom in a local hotel and had invited all the original contestants, plus their partners and families.
The production team had gone to town. A host of purple and silver sequined banners fluttered from the ceiling, a tree stood to one side, groaning with purple lights and waitresses, dressed as silver mini-skirted fairies, dotted about, dispensing mulled wine and mince pies.
At the centre of the ballroom hung an over-sized silver glitterball, from which hung an enormous bunch of mistletoe, swagged with purple and silver satin ribbons.
It was all very over the top. And very Who Dares Dances.
As Julia entered, on Daniel’s arm, the big band began to play.
“Bit of a busman’s holiday this, isn’t it?” she whispered to him and they laughed.
“Big difference between dancing for a competition and dancing for pleasure,” he replied and pulled her into his arms for a foxtrot.
And he was proved right. Everyone let their hair down but the professionals really let rip. Julia, grabbing a glass of wine and using the time to get her breath back, watched in amazement.
Erica was doing a cha cha cha with Scott, Suni’s irritable Australian partner. Alicia was smooching with husband Warren and Callum, true to form, was getting up close and personal with Casey.
“Quite a sight, isn’t it?” Julia turned to see Harri’s sweetly familiar face next to her. They watched in silence for a few minutes as Eva and Jan outshone every dancer on the floor by doing moves that were definitely not recognised in any formal competition.
“Is she sober?” Julia wondered as Eva was whirled round by Jan and hoisted into a one handed lift. Eva had a glazed expression in her eyes and Julia had never seen the dancer look even slightly out of control before.
Harri laughed. “Don’t know and don’t really care.” He emptied his glass.
Julia took two more from the table behind them and passed him one. “I haven’t seen much of you lately,” she said, almost afraid to bring it up.
“Busy filming,” he shrugged. “We’ve got three Christmas specials of Red Pepper to go out and I’ve been doing those. I’ve only just got back from seeing Father Christmas in Lapland.” Harri gave a short, “Ho, ho, ho. He says if you’re a good girl, you’ll get a present.”
“Haven’t they given you any time off?” Julia looked at him curiously. He had shadows under his eyes and was pale and drawn. He had a heavier work commitment than any of them but hadn’t let it show until now.
“Some, and despite what the bookies say, I don’t think they thought I’d be in it this long, see.” He shrugged again and took another drink.
“Did you?”
“No,” he laughed and finally met her eyes. “Did you?”
Julia smiled back. “You know I didn’t. It’s true that miracles happen at Christmas – you’re looking at one.”
Harri laughed again but this time more easily. “I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too.”
He gave a great sigh and put his glass down, as if coming to a decision. “Dance with me?” He held out a hand.
“Yes please,” she said and took it.
They didn’t take much notice of the demands of the music, just held each other closely. Harri put his head down and nestled into Julia’s neck, breathing in her soft and familiar perfume. He tightened his hold on her, afraid she would escape him.
Daniel felt his eyes drawn to them and smiled sadly. He’d long known he couldn’t compete with Harri. He’d come as close as he ever had to falling in love with Julia, maybe he really did love her. He admired her strength, her determination and her stubbornness in the face of continued criticism but he accepted that she was not for him. Perhaps no woman would ever be for him. But Julia had come closest. He turned away.
Harri and Julia stopped dancing and stood looking at one another. Harri looked up at the glitterball, still rotating slowly, showering everyone in a glittery light. A smile played on his lips as he noticed the mistletoe. He drew back and stared into Julia’s eyes. He seemed to be silently asking her something and nodded in satisfaction at the answer written on her face. He didn’t want to stop holding her, touching her. He’d made up his mind and he was going to act on his decision before it was too late – or before he lost his nerve.
“Do you want to get out of here?” he murmured finally.
Julia smiled up at him. “Not another pizza?”
“Not quite what I had in mind.”
He looked at her and she was suddenly certain what he wanted – because she wanted it too.
“Yes,” she whispered back. “Yes, I’d like nothing better than to get out of here.”
He took her to a bar nearby. It was quiet and had high-sided booths lining the walls, which afforded them privacy.
After ordering drinks, he took her hand and stared at it intently. It was peaceful in here, a contrast to the party they’d just left. Julia leaned back on the cool leather couch, closed her eyes and listened to the soft jazz playing. She felt Harri smooth a finger over her palm and onto the sensitive skin of her wrist. He lifted her hand and then kissed her there, his mouth hot and demanding. Still she didn’t open her eyes but let the sensations swirl around her, jolting a shot a pure sex to her core.
“Harri?” she said eventually and opened her eyes to find his face near hers and her mouth captured.
For a first kiss it was pretty good. One strong arm held her to him but, while his mouth plundered hers, he did not relinquish his hold on her hand.
Eventually they broke apart, content simply to gaze into one another’s eyes.
“God!” Julia said when she had her breath back. “Thank God,” she said and meant it.
Now he did let go of her hand and ran a finger down her cheek. It was hot and he smiled, pleased that he had made her so.
“I’ve wanted to do that for a while,” he said, his Welsh accent pronounced.
“Then why didn’t you?” Julia found she was breathing heavily and her eyes dropped to his mouth. She wanted him to kiss her again.
He sighed heavily. “Don’t get me wrong, I really wanted to but…in my line of work I have to be careful. I can’t go around, you know…”
“That’s the silliest thing I’ve ever heard!”
“Do you know, cariad, I couldn’t agree more.”
“Kiss me again,” she demanded.
He did so and then broke away to answer. “Besides I wasn’t sure how you felt.”
“I don’t think I was sure. Until now.” She traced a finger lightly over his generous lips. He had such a well-shaped mouth she thought, she hadn’t noticed it until now and wondered why.
Harri smiled again, he couldn’t seem to stop. “Well cariad, you were spending so much time with the lovely Daniel.”
Julia straightened. “He’s coaching me!” she said indignantly. “He’s a really good friend. And I think he’s gay anyway.” She blushed.
“He didn’t look very gay from where I was standing. Something tells me Daniel wants you as more than a friend.”
This time Julia grinned. “You’re jealous!” The realisation sent a warm glow spreading through her.
“You bet. It’s been tearing me apart.”
He raised a hand to the back of her neck and brought her close to him again. He was a little rough but Julia didn’t mind, she found she was exhilarated and the sexual tug, deep in her soul, pulled at her again. Their mouths met and this time neither held anything back.
The sound of their drinks being clinked down on the glass table in front of them had them springing apart and giggling.
“Let’s get out of here,” Harri threw down a note. “Which flat’s closest?”
“Mine,” Julia said and grabbed her coat. They went out into the icy December night where the white Christmas lights turned them monochrome.
“Islington, please,” she said to the taxi driver as they got into the cab. She was shivering violently but it wasn’t with cold.
“Might take a while love,” he replied, “traffic’s terrible tonight. Crowds out to see the lights, I expect.”
Julia and Harri didn’t notice how long the journey home was, nor did they notice the spectacular Christmas lights; they were too busy kissing. They broke off just long enough to unlock Julia’s front door and then it slammed behind them as Harri shoved her, none too gently, up against it. He took her hands in his and Julia felt open and vulnerable and incredibly turned on.
“I can’t stop kissing you,” he murmured, “I just can’t stop kissing you.” He tore her scarf away and kissed her neck, leaving a trail of fire. His knee nudged her legs apart and she felt him hard and demanding as he pressed against her. She’d never felt this sexually charged she thought incoherently, she was going to explode if she didn’t have him. He searched under her heavy coat, and then slid two fingers into a gap in the front of her shirt. A button tore but neither noticed as Harri tugged the delicate lace of Julia’s bra away and cupped her breast with his hand. Julia felt her knees give way, his hand was cold and the shock of it had her nipple zinging to life. Another button shot off and he took his burning mouth to her breast. The door rattled on its hinges under their combined weight and Julia would have been quite happy for him to take her there and then.
But Harri had other ideas, at heart he was a gentleman and it didn’t seem right to be doing what they doing up against the cold glass of Julia’s front door. And besides, he’d wanted her for so long that he was worried he wouldn’t last much longer. He backed off, his dark eyes veiled with lust. “Bed,” he managed, “where’s the bed?”
Julia nodded wordlessly, took him by the hand and led him to her bedroom. As they stumbled along clutching one another, unable to let go, they paused to kiss frantically. They ripped off some more clothes and left a trail of winter coats, scarves, bags. Then they fell onto the bed and wrestled with one another’s remaining clothes until they were skin on skin at long last. Julia was aware only of the erotic tickle of the soft hair on Harri’s chest against her breasts and the feel of his needy erection pressing against her stomach. She gasped as Harri almost immediately rolled her onto her back and slid into her.
“Sorry, cariad, can’t wait,” he muttered. “Oh Duw, I’ve wanted this for so long!”
Julia’s head arched back. She couldn’t believe it, she was beginning to come already. Wave after wave of ecstasy spiralled through her, around her, over her. She felt Harri tense, hang over her for a long second and then collapse onto her, crushing her with his weight. “Rwyn dy garu di,” he breathed. “I love you,” He added, in his head.
Julia woke first in the morning. It was still dark outside but she’d grown accustomed to waking early to get to Jan’s demanding rehearsals and today would be no different. She poked her nose above the duvet, shivered and pulled it round her again. She’d have to brace herself to go and turn on the heating. Funny how they’d not noticed the cold last night.
She twisted and gazed at Harri lying on his side facing her. He was frowning slightly in his sleep and had the quilt tucked up around his shoulders as if cold. His hair was sticking up any old how and he looked like a little boy. Julia smiled and remembered that he’d definitely not been the little boy last night. She giggled as she recalled how he’d woken her in the middle of the night and made love to her again, this time with a tender gentleness and at an agonisingly slow pace which had had her crying out in relief when he’d finally entered her.
She’d been right about him she thought with yet another giggle; he was a man of hearty appetites. He shifted slightly and gave a little snuffle. Julia got out of bed, loathe to leave him but desperate for some heat and a shower.
He was awake when she returned and greeted her with a huge grin on his face.
“You look very smug,” she said but softened the comment with a smile and got back onto the bed.
“And you look gorgeous,” he replied and tugged at the towel wrapped around her hair.
“Oh yes, I’m sure I do,” she said as her hair fell down and flapped damply against her face. “I’m sure I’d win the public vote if I went on tonight looking like this.”
“You get my vote every time.”
“Corny.”
“But true.” Harri’s eyebrows quirked wickedly in that expressive way they had. “Come here, I’ve got something to show you.”
“We’ll be late for training, Harri!”
He pulled at her dressing gown belt and the robe fell apart, revealing her breasts. He grinned at the sight. “For once, I’ve got something worth being late for. Come and see what I’ve got for you.”
As the duvet was tented up dramatically around the area of his groin, Julia had a pretty good idea what he had in mind to show her but she played along. “What is it?”
He grinned again and flipped back the duvet. “Dyma un a nes i’n gynharach!”
“What?” she said as he tumbled her into bed and covered her with his warm body.
“It’s one I made earlier!” he said and he kissed her through their laughter.
“God Harri,” she moaned a little later. “I think you’ve finally found your hip action!”
Step Nine.
In the car on the way to the studio, Julia snuggled up to Harri and whispered, “So, are you finally going to tell me what you said to me in Welsh?”
He rolled his eyes heavenwards and tutted in mock despair. “I told you, it means it’s one I made earlier. It’s a sort of a pun you know on … but honestly, if I have to explain my jokes all the time, this relationship is doomed.” He stopped as she hit him.
“Not that! What you said last night, you know, as you erm –”
“Oh that!” He looked at her with amusement lighting his dark eyes. “You’re not brilliant with languages, are you, cariad? Have you forgotten? I’ve told you what it means, already!”
Julia shook her head and grinned. “I’m about as good at languages as I am at dancing!”
“That bad, eh?”
She gave him another playful punch.
“And another thing, you’ve got to stop hitting me!”
“Tell me!”
“I will – but another time.” He glanced at the driver who was obviously intrigued as to why he was picking up both Harri and Julia from the same address that morning. “Another time when we’re alone, see.”
And for the moment Julia had to be content with that.
Jan had been furious with her for being late but it hadn’t broken into the bubble of happiness that she existed in throughout the day. She came across Harri often as he rehearsed with Eva and they made stupid little signs and gestures to one another.
“Me, I am to be sick!” announced Eva at the final dress rehearsal later that afternoon, as a comment on their behaviour.
“Tsk. Unprofessional,” agreed Jan but he was secretly delighted that Julia, finally, was showing signs that she could actually dance.
The atmosphere in the quarter-final show was electric. The judges went wild over Harri’s newfound confidence and, to Julia’s amusement, declared that he had finally found his hip action. She’d caught his eye at that point and they’d had hysterics. Julia sobered up quickly when she found herself in the dance off, competing against Callum. Despite being the bookies’ favourite, he’d performed abysmally in his quickstep; it just hadn’t been a dance suited to big man like him.
The four of them stood breathlessly in front of the judges after the exertion of dancing yet again. Julia tried to console herself with the thought that getting as far as this was as good as it could get, to get to the semi-final would be a miracle too far.
As Charlie announced that the judges were about to declare the result, based on the best performance in the dance off, there seemed to be a buzzing in her ears and it was proving hard to concentrate. An ominous silence fell on the studio and after a wait of what seemed like three days the announcement was made.
A resounding cheer sounded around the studio and the entire crowd rose to their feet. In contrast, Jan fell to his knees beside her and appeared to be praying. Even for a Russian this seemed a bit of an over emotional response thought Julia and then Callum, gripping her in a bear hug, squeezed all rational thought out of her.
“Good on you,” he yelled in his gruff Scottish accent and then took advantage of her confusion to give her a disgustingly sloppy kiss.
“Wha-what?”
He put her back on the floor and peered down at her. “Did you not hear? You’ve got through. You’re in the semi-final!”
To Julia, it seemed as if everything exploded in a deafening riot of noise and colour. The other competitors, who hugged and kissed them with lavish excess, surrounded her and Jan. Then the crowd parted and Julia saw the person she really wanted: Harri, standing slightly apart, as he always did. She shot into his arms like an arrow finding its target and hung on.
“Da iawn, cariad bach,” he whispered into her ear. “Well done!”
Step Ten.
Julia opened her front door at the first knock. She knew it would be Harri. After the celebrations in the studio, he’d gone home to get some fresh clothes with the promise to come back with the papers and to enjoy a lazy Sunday with her. She had coffee perking, croissants warming in the oven and was looking forward to spending some time with him. But as soon as she saw his face, she knew something was very wrong.