Bleak House

'No, no,' he said, 'no closing up of my paths, by any Dedlock! Though I willingly confess,' here he softened in a moment, 'that Lady Dedlock is the most accomplished lady in the world, to whom I would do any homage that a plain gentleman, and no baronet with a head seven hundred years thick, may. A man who joined his regiment at twenty, and, within a week, challenged the most imperious and presumptuous coxcomb of a commanding officer that ever drew the breath of life through a tight waist – and got broke for it– is not the man to be walked over, by all the Sir Lucifers, dead or alive, locked or unlocked. Ha, ha, ha!'

'Nor the man to allow his junior to be walked over, either?' said my Guardian.

'Most assuredly not!' said Mr. Boythorn, clapping him on the shoulder with an air of protection, that had something serious in it, though he laughed. 'He will stand by the low boy, always. Jarndyce, you may rely upon him! But, speaking of this trespass – with apologies to Miss Glare and Miss Summerson for the length at which I have pursued so dry a subject – is there nothing for me from your men, Kenge and Carboy?'

'I think not, Esther?' said Mr. Jarndyce.

'Nothing, Guardian.'

'Much obliged!' said Mr. Boythorn. 'Had no need to ask, after even my slight experience of Miss Summerson's forethought for every one about her.' (They all encouraged me; they were determined to do it.) 'I inquired because, coming from Lincolnshire, I of course have not yet been in town, and I thought some letters might have been sent down here. I dare say they will report progress to-morrow morning.'

I saw him so often, in the course of the evening, which passed very pleasantly, contemplate Richard and Ada with an interest and a satisfaction that made his fine face remarkably agreeable as he sat at a little distance from the piano listening to the music – and he had small occasion to tell us that he was passionately fond of music, for his face showed it – that I asked my Guardian, as we sat at the backgammon board, whether Mr. Boythorn had ever been married.

'No,' said he. 'No.'

'But he meant to be!' said I.

'How did you find out that?' he returned, with a smile.

'Why, Guardian,' I explained, not without reddening a little at hazarding what was in my thoughts, 'there is something so tender in his manner, after all, and he is so very courtly and gentle to us, and—'

Mr. Jarndyce directed his eyes to where he was sitting, as I have just described him.

I said no more.

'You are right, little woman,' he answered. 'He was all but married, once. Long ago. And once.'

'Did the lady die?'

'No – but she died to him. That time has had its influence on all his later life. Would you suppose him to have a head and a heart full of romance yet?'

'I think, Guardian, I might have supposed so. But it is easy to say that, when you have told me so.'

'He has never since been what he might have been,' said Mr. Jarndyce, 'and now you see him in his age with no one near him but his servant, and his little yellow friend. – It's your throw, my dear!'

I felt, from my Guardian's manner, that beyond this point I could not pursue the subject without changing the wind. I therefore forbore to ask any further questions. I was interested, but not curious. I thought a little while about this old love story in the night, when I was awakened by Mr. Boy-thorn's lusty snoring; and I tried to do that very difficult thing, imagine old people young again, and invested with the graces of youth. But I fell asleep before I had succeeded, and dreamed of the days when I lived in my godmother's house. I am not sufficiently acquainted with such subjects to know whether it is at all remarkable that I almost always dreamed of that period of my life.

With the morning, there came a letter from Messrs. Kenge and Carboy to Mr. Boythorn, informing him that one of their clerks would wait upon him at noon. As it was the day of the week on which I paid the bills, and added up my books, and made all the household affairs as compact as possible, I remained at home while Mr. Jarndyce, Ada, and Richard, took advantage of a very fine day to make a little excursion. Mr. Boy thorn was to wait for Kenge and Carboy's clerk, and then was to go on foot to meet them on their return.

Well! I was full of business, examining tradesmen's books, adding up columns, paying money, filing receipts, and I dare say making a great bustle about it, when Mr. Guppy was announced and shown in. I had had some idea that the clerk who was to be sent down, might be the young gentleman who had met me at the coach-office; and I was glad to see him, because he was associated with my present happiness.

I scarcely knew him again, he was so uncommonly smart. He had an entirely new suit of glossy clothes on, a shining hat, lilac-kid gloves, a neckerchief of a variety of colours, a large hot-house flower in his button-hole, and a thick gold ring on his little finger. Besides which, he quite scented the dining-room with bear's-grease and other perfumery. He looked at me with an attention that quite confused me, when I begged him to take a seat until the servant should return; and as he sat there, crossing and uncrossing his legs in a corner, and I asked him if he had had a pleasant ride, and hoped that Mr. Kenge was well, I never looked at him, but I found him looking at me, in the same scrutinising and curious way.

When the request was brought to him that he would go up-stairs to Mr. Boythorn's room, I mentioned that he would find lunch prepared for him when he came down, of which Mr. Jarndyce hoped he would partake. He said with some embarrassment, holding the handle of the door, 'Shall I have the honour of finding you here, miss?' I replied yes, I should be there; and he went out with a bow and another look.

I thought him only awkward and shy, for he was evidently much embarrassed; and I fancied that the best thing I could do, would be to wait until I saw that he had everything he wanted, and then to leave him to himself. The lunch was soon brought, but it remained for some time on the table. The interview with Mr. Boythorn was a long one – and a stormy one too, I should think; for although his room was at some distance, I heard his loud voice every now and then like a high wind, and evidently blowing perfect broadsides of denunciation.

At last Mr. Guppy came back, looking something the worse for the conference. 'My eye, miss,' he said in a low voice, 'he's a Tartar!'

'Pray take some refreshment, sir,' said I.

Mr. Guppy sat down at the table, and began nervously sharpening the carving-knife on the carving-fork; still looking at me (as I felt quite sure without looking at him), in the same unusual manner. The sharpening lasted so long, that at last I felt a kind of obligation on me to raise my eyes, in order that I might break the spell under which he seemed to labour, of not being able to leave off.

He immediately looked at the dish, and began to carve.

'What will you take yourself, miss? You'll take a morsel of something?'

'No, thank you,' said I.

'Shan't I give you a piece of anything at all, miss?' said Mr. Guppy, hurriedly drinking off a glass of wine.

'Nothing, thank you,' said I. 'I have only waited to see that you have everything you want. Is there anything I can order for you?'

'No, I am much obliged to you, miss, I'm sure. I've everything that I can require to make me comfortable – at least I – not comfortable – I'm never that:' he drank off two more glasses of wine, one after another.

I thought I had better go.

'I beg your pardon, miss!' said Mr. Guppy, rising, when he saw me rise. 'But would you allow me the favour of a minute's private conversation?'

Not knowing what to say, I sat down again.

'What follows is without prejudice, miss?' said Mr. Guppy, anxiously bringing a chair towards my table.

'I don't understand what you mean,' said I, wondering.

'It's one of our law terms, miss. You won't make any use of it to my detriment, at Kenge and Carboy's, or elsewhere. If our conversation shouldn't lead to anything, I am to be as I was, and am not to be prejudiced in my situation or worldly prospects. In short, it's in total confidence.'

'I am at a loss, sir,' said I, 'to imagine what you can have to communicate in total confidence to me, whom you have never seen but once; but I should be very sorry to do you any injury.'

'Thank you, miss. I'm sure of it – that's quite sufficient.' All this time Mr. Guppy was either planing his forehead with his handkerchief, or tightly rubbing the palm of his left hand with the palm of his right. 'If you would excuse my taking another glass of wine, miss, I think it might assist me in getting on, without a continual choke that cannot fail to be mutually unpleasant.'

He did so, and came back again. I took the opportunity of moving well behind my table.

'You wouldn't allow me to offer you one, would you, miss?' said Mr. Guppy, apparently refreshed.

'Not any,' said I.

'Not half a glass?' said Mr. Guppy; 'quarter? No! Then, to proceed. My present salary, Miss Summerson, at Kenge and Carboy's, is two pound a week. When I first had the happiness of looking upon you, it was one-fifteen, and had stood at that figure for a lengthened period. A rise of five has since taken place, and a further rise of five is guaranteed at the expiration of a term not exceeding twelve months from the present date. My mother has a little property, which takes the form of a small life annuity; upon which she lives in an independent though unassuming manner, in the Old Street Road. She is eminently calculated for a mother-in-law. She never interferes, is all for peace, and her disposition easy. She has her failings – as who has not? – but I never knew her do it when company was present; at which time you may freely trust her with wines, spirits, or malt liquors. My own abode is lodgings at Penton Place, Pentonville. It is lowly, but airy, open at the back, and considered one of the 'ealthiest outlets. Miss Summerson! In the mildest language, I adore you. Would you be so kind as to allow me (as I may say) to file a declaration – to make an offer!'

Mr. Guppy went down on his knees. I was well behind my table, and not much frightened. I said, 'Get up from that ridiculous position immediately, sir, or you will oblige me to break my implied promise and ring the bell!'

'Hear me out, miss!' said Mr. Guppy, folding his hands.

'I cannot consent to hear another word, sir,' I returned, 'unless you get up from the carpet directly, and go and sit down at the table, as you ought to do if you have any sense at all.'

He looked piteously, but slowly rose and did so.

'Yet what a mockery it is, miss,' he said, with his hand upon his heart, and shaking his head at me in a melancholy manner over the tray, 'to be stationed behind food at such a moment. The soul recoils from food at such a moment, miss.'

'I beg you to conclude,' said I; 'you have asked me to hear you out, and I beg you to conclude.'

'I will, miss,' said Mr. Guppy. 'As I love and honour, so likewise I obey. Would that I could make Thee the subject of that vow, before the shrine!'

'That is quite impossible,' said I, 'and entirely out of the question.'

'I am aware,' said Mr. Guppy, leaning forward over the tray, and regarding me, as I again strangely felt, though my eyes were not directed to him, with his late intent look, 'I am aware that in a worldly point of view, according to all appearances, my offer is a poor one. But, Miss Summerson! Angel! – No, don't ring – I have been brought up in a sharp school, and am accustomed to a variety of general practice. Though a young man, I have ferreted out evidence, got up cases, and seen lots of life. Blest with your hand, what means might I not find of advancing your interests, and pushing your fortunes! What might I not get to know, nearly concerning you? I know nothing now, certainly; but what might I not, if I had your confidence, and you set me on?'

I told him that he addressed my interest, or what he supposed to be my interest, quite as unsuccessfully as he addressed my inclination; and he would now understand that I requested him, if he pleased, to go away immediately.

'Cruel miss,' said Mr. Guppy, 'hear but another word! I think you must have seen that I was struck with those charms, on the day when I waited at the Whytorseller. I think you must have remarked that I could not forbear a tribute to those charms when I put up the steps of the 'ackney-coach. It was a feeble tribute to Thee, but it was well meant. Thy image has ever since been fixed in my breast. I have walked up and down, of an evening, opposite Jellyby's house, only to look upon the bricks that once contained Thee. This out of to-day, quite an unnecessary out so far as the attendance, which was its pretended object, went, was planned by me alone for Thee alone. If I speak of interest, it is only to recommend myself and my respectful wretchedness. Love was before it, and is before it.'

'I should be pained, Mr. Guppy,' said I, rising and putting my hand upon the bell-rope, 'to do you, or any one who was sincere, the injustice of slighting any honest feeling, however disagreeably expressed. If you have really meant to give me a proof of your good opinion, though ill-timed and misplaced, I feel that I ought to thank you. I have very little reason to be proud, and I am not proud. I hope,' I think I added, without very well knowing what I said, 'that you will now go away as if you had never been so exceedingly foolish, and attend to Messrs. Kenge and Carboy's business.'

'Half a minute, miss!' cried Mr. Guppy, checking me as I was about to ring. 'This has been without prejudice?'

'I will never mention it,' said I, 'unless you should give me future occasion to do so.'

'A quarter of a minute, miss! In case you should think better – at any time, however distant, that's no consequence, for my feelings can never alter – of anything I have said, particularly what might I not do – Mr. William Guppy, eighty-seven, Penton Place, or if removed, or dead (of blighted hopes or anything of that sort), care of Mrs. Guppy, three hundred and two, Old Street Road, will be sufficient.'

I rang the bell, the servant came, and Mr. Guppy, laying his written card upon the table, and making a dejected bow, departed. Raising my eyes as he went out, I once more saw him looking at me after he had passed the door.

I sat there for another hour or more, finishing my books and payments, and getting through plenty of business. Then, I arranged my desk, and put everything away, and was so composed and cheerful that I thought I had quite dismissed this unexpected incident. But, when I went up-stairs to my own room, I surprised myself by beginning to laugh about it, and then surprised myself still more by beginning to cry about it. In short, I was in a flutter for a little while; and felt as if an old chord had been more coarsely touched than it ever had been since the days of the dear old doll, long buried in the garden.