His By Any Means
“It is.” And ordinarily, she never would have bought anything like it. But Angelica had insisted on taking Colleen shopping for the perfect dress to wear to the rehearsal dinner. Sage’s sister had picked this dress out for Colleen and she’d worn it the night Sage had first noticed her. The night...her eyes widened suddenly. “Oh, God. I can’t wear this dress tonight. I was wearing it the night Sage’s father collapsed and died. What was I thinking?”
She turned to head for her bedroom and the pitiful offerings she might find in her closet, but Jenna stopped her with one hand on her arm. “You can’t retire the dress, Colleen. For one thing, it didn’t kill Mr. Lassiter, and it’s just too amazing to be tossed into the dark abyss that is your closet.”
“Thank you.”
“And for another thing, trust me when I say that when Sage gets a look at you in this dress—” Jenna took a step back, swept her gaze up and down Colleen and whistled “—it won’t be funerals that’ll spring to mind.”
A tiny thrill dazzled Colleen before she remembered that Jenna was her friend. Of course she was going to compliment her. But, she told herself firmly, let’s be realistic. Sage Lassiter was not interested in her. Going to dinner with him meant absolutely nothing.
“This is crazy,” she said aloud. “I’m acting like this is a date and it’s not.” Colleen wrung her hands together until she realized what she was doing, then she stopped that pitiful action. “Honestly. Slacks and a sweater. That’s what I should wear.”
“If you change one more time, I’m going to tie you to a chair,” Jenna warned. “You look great, you’ve got a date—”
“Not a date—”
“—you’re going to dinner with the most gorgeous man in Wyoming, possibly the United States—”
“I wonder what Tom would say if he heard that.”
Jenna grinned. “He’s not worried. My Tom’s not gorgeous, but he has other...compensations.”
“You’re impossible.” Colleen could admit silently that she felt more than a little envy of her friend’s relationship with her very cute husband.
“Tom thinks so...” She grinned again and wiggled her eyebrows for emphasis.
If Colleen had half the confidence that Jenna had, she wouldn’t be the slightest bit nervous about her nondate. As it was though...the bats in her stomach—too big for butterflies—were flying in tighter and tighter circles. It was as if they were winding an invisible spring inside her and Colleen was terrified that it was going to snap at just the wrong moment.
Maybe the red dress would help. It was beautiful and wearing it, she couldn’t help but feel more confident. Besides, she told herself, Sage might not even remember that she was wearing this dress at the rehearsal dinner.
“Have some wine.” Jenna offered her own glass and Colleen snatched at it, taking a big gulp, hoping to drown the bats. Apparently though, they knew how to swim.
“This is a mistake,” she muttered and handed the glass back to her friend.
“No, it’s not. You’re a terrific person, Colleen. It’s about time you let some man figure that out for himself.”
“It’s not a—”
“Yes, yes.” Jenna walked back to the love seat, dropped onto the slipcovered cushions and stared up at her. “Now, tell me how my best friend becomes a millionaire and gets a date with the Sage Lassiter.”
“Weren’t you listening? It’s not a date.”
“Whatever.” She patted the cushion beside her. “So how’re you doing, really, with this crazy, world-shifting, life-altering day?”
Good question. “Actually, I think I’m feeling better about the money.”
“Yay!”
Smiling, Colleen thought about sitting down, but she didn’t want to wrinkle her dress. How did the beautiful people do this all the time? “Really, I’ve had all day to think about it, and you know, Sage was right. Even if I give up the money to charity, people will still talk. I’ll just be poor while they’re talking about me.”
“He’s obviously brilliant as well as gorgeous. I like him already.”
Colleen did, too. Which was worrying on a whole different level. Still, first things first. Now that she’d decided to accept J.D.’s amazing gift, her life was going to change. Big-time. Laughing to herself, she said, “You know this means I can quit my job.”
Jenna lifted her glass. “Excellent. Soon-to-be nurse practitioner Colleen Falkner.”
Colleen put one hand to her abdomen to ease those bats that were still flying in formation in the pit of her stomach. But it was a futile gesture. Her body had been through so many ups and downs today, there was no calming it. Oddly enough, it wasn’t even the money or the knowledge that she could make her dreams come true that was really affecting her. Nope, that was all Sage Lassiter. His eyes. His mouth. The deep rumble of his voice, the impossibly broad shoulders.
Oh, God.
She shouldn’t be going to dinner with him. Colleen turned and glanced into the mirror again and what she saw didn’t make her feel any better. Her eyes were too wide, her boobs were too big, her hair was a mass of waves on her shoulders because no matter what she’d tried, she hadn’t been able to clip it up and keep it from looking like a rat’s nest.
Why was she putting herself through this? What if she couldn’t talk? What if staring at him across a table turned her into a mute? Or worse, her mind taunted, what if she babbled incoherently?
“Stop.”
“What?” Colleen came up out of her nerve-racking thoughts like a drowning woman breaching the surface of a lake. She was practically gasping for air.
Shaking her head, Jenna said, “You’re making yourself nuts. It’s just dinner, Colleen. You eat dinner every day. You can do this.”
Could she? She didn’t think so. Heck, her last date had been...oh, God, she couldn’t even remember when she’d dated last. All she could recall was that the guy in question had bored her to tears and then tried to grope her on her front porch. Good times. “I’m being crazy, aren’t I?”
“Just a little.”
“Right.” Sage certainly wouldn’t be boring, she told herself. And if he tried to grope her, she might just let him. Oh, boy. Get a grip, she told herself silently. She was making too much of this. Sage wanted to talk about his late father. All she had to do was keep remembering that and she’d be fine. By talking to him, spending time with him, she could help him get the closure he no doubt needed.
This wasn’t about her and her fantasies. This was about a man, who in spite of his wealth and remarkable good looks, had lost a link to his past. With that thought firmly in mind, she let her sympathy for his loss rise up to drown her silly hormonal meltdown.
“You’re right,” she said, and reached out to take another sip of Jenna’s wine. Colleen hadn’t poured herself any because she hadn’t wanted to risk alcohol on a nearly empty stomach. But the crisp, sharp taste of the Sauvignon Blanc felt like bliss sliding down her too-tight throat. Then the cold, wheat-colored liquid hit her stomach and immediately soothed those pesky bats.
She took a breath, handed the glass back and checked her reflection one last time. “It’s just a meal with a grieving man.”
“Yep. Just dinner with the gorgeous, incredibly sexy, unattainable black sheep billionaire,” Jenna said with a grin. “No pressure.”
Oh, God.
Five
The condo was small, even for a condo.
Sage gave it a quick once-over as he approached the front door. It was tidy, with its cream-colored paint and postage stamp–sized front garden, where spring bulbs were pushing up through the earth. There was a wreath of silk flowers hanging on her front door and when he pushed the doorbell, he wasn’t even surprised to hear a series of melodic chimes sounding out from somewhere inside.
What did surprise him was Colleen.
She opened the door and every scrap of air escaped from his lungs. She was wearing that red dress again. The one she’d worn the night of the rehearsal dinner. The night he’d really seen her for the first time. That damn dress was designed to bring a man to his knees. It molded her figure, defined her luscious breasts and skimmed across rounded hips that made a man think of long, dark nights and hot, steamy sex. Her dark blond hair tumbled over her shoulders and looked like raw honey. He caught the wink of gold earrings when she tossed her hair back and then his gaze dropped lower—to the expanse of smooth, pale flesh that ended in a spectacular display of the tops of her breasts. It was all he could do to lift his gaze to meet her eyes.
“You look beautiful,” he said before he could think better of it. Hell, he was always in control of any given situation, and at the moment, he felt like a teenager on his first date. Hard body and vacant mind.
She beamed at him as if he’d handed her flowers, and immediately he told himself he should have done just that. If he was trying to sway her into spilling her secrets, then he should use all the weapons he could bring to bear.
“Thank you,” she said, her voice just a little breathless. “Let me get my coat.”
She reached into a hall closet, pulled out a heavy black coat and slipped into it, covering herself up so thoroughly, Sage’s brain was able to kick back into gear.
She stepped onto the porch, locked her front door, then joined him with another smile. “Shall we go?”
And he knew at that moment, when her blue eyes were staring into his, that this night was not going to go according to plan.
At the restaurant, Sage was grateful for the clink of fine crystal and the murmured conversations that reminded him they were in a public place. Otherwise he might have been in trouble. She was damned distracting, sitting across from him.
“This is lovely,” she said, turning her head to look around the interior of Moscone’s Italian restaurant. It was filled with small round tables, covered in white linen and each boasting a single candle in the center. A sleek black-and-chrome bar stood along one wall and Italian arias played softly over the loudspeaker. The floors were tile, the waiters were all in white aprons and the scents filling the air were amazing. “I’ve never been here before.”
“Food’s good,” Sage mused. “But they’re going to have some serious competition when the Lassiter Grill opens up.” Damn. He could hardly get words past the knot of need in his throat. Sage took a sip of the wine the waiter had poured just moments before.
“It was really nice of you to bring me here,” she said, “but it wasn’t necessary. We could have talked at my house.”
But then she wouldn’t have worn the dress. Sage shifted uncomfortably on the black leather bench seat. He hadn’t expected to spend the night in agony, but apparently he was going to. And just by looking at her, he knew she had absolutely no idea what she was doing to him. He had to take back control of this situation or he was going to achieve nothing.
“What can you tell me?” he asked, blurting the question out to divert himself from the thoughts plaguing him.
“Anything you want to know.”
Like if you talked an old man into leaving you money? Did you steer him away from giving Angelica the company she loves? Did you wear that damn dress on purpose, knowing what it would do to me?
Couldn’t start with those questions, though...could he? His brain scrambled, coming up with a different way to begin.
“First tell me about you. How long have you been a nurse?” Good. Get her talking. Then later, once she’d relaxed her guard, he’d be able to slide the more important questions in.
She took a sip of wine and he watched, hypnotized by the movement in her throat as she swallowed. Not good.
“Eleven years,” she said, setting the goblet back onto the table and sliding her fingertips up and down the long, elegant stem.
Sage’s gaze fixed on to that motion, and his brain fogged over even as his body went rock hard. He had to force himself to pay attention when she continued to speak quietly.
“When my father got sick, it was such a blessing to be able to help my mom take care of him.” Old pain etched itself into her eyes briefly. “After he died, I realized that I was more interested in taking care of people one-on-one than in a hospital setting. I decided to become a private nurse. So I could make a real difference in the lives of families who were going through what we went through.”
Was she really as selfless and kind as she appeared? He wanted to spot deception, gamesmanship in her eyes, but those soft blue depths remained as clear and guileless as ever. Was she really that good an actress, he wondered. Or was she really an innocent?
No, he mentally assured himself. There were no innocents anymore. And a woman this staggeringly beautiful had no doubt learned before she was five just how to work a man.
Pleased that he’d managed to wrest control of his own urges, he asked, “How long ago did you lose your father?”
“Six years,” she said softly and her features once again twisted with sorrow.
“Then,” she added, “Mom and I both decided we needed a change, a chance to get away from the memories, so we left California and came here.”
“Why Cheyenne?”
She laughed a little and her blue eyes sparkled with it. Instantly, his control drowned in a sea of pulsing desire that grabbed hold of him and wouldn’t let go.
“You won’t believe it.”
“Try me.”
“Okay.” She leaned in a little closer, as if telling a funny story. Unfortunately, this increased his view of the delectable cleavage that dress displayed.
“We laid a map of the U.S. out on the dining room table and Mom closed her eyes and poked her finger down. She hit Cheyenne and here we are.”
Surprise and a bit of admiration rose up inside him, however reluctantly. “Just like that. You packed up and moved to somewhere you’d never been before.”
“It was an adventure,” she told him with a smile. “And we both needed one. Watching someone you love die by inches is horrible. At least you were spared that. I know it’s not much comfort though.”
He didn’t speak because, frankly, what the hell could he say? She’d obviously had a much better relationship with her father than he’d had with his.
“Although,” she added, “the snow was hard to get used to. We’re California girls through and through, so we needed a whole new wardrobe when we got here.”
“I can imagine.” His mind brought up the image of her seeing her first snowfall, and he almost wished he’d been there to witness it.
“When your winter coat is a sweatshirt and you can wear flip-flops year-round...” Another bright smile. “Let’s just say it was even more of an adventure than we’d thought it would be.”
“But you enjoy it?”
“I love it,” she said simply. “I’d never had a change of season before. I love the fall. And the snow is so beautiful. Then the spring when everything comes alive again. Mostly though, I love the mountains.”
“Me, too.” Funny, he hadn’t thought they’d find common ground, but here it was. Unless, his mind chided, she was saying what she thought he wanted to hear. After all, if J.D. had talked about him as she said, then she knew Sage owned a ranch in the high country, and why else would he do that if he didn’t love the mountains?
“I know... J.D. told me about your ranch.”
Ha! Proof then. But he played along. “If I can help it, I rarely come down off the mountain into the city.”
“I know that, too,” she said, her hand stilling on the wineglass. “J.D. talked about you a lot. How you preferred your ranch to anywhere else in the world. He missed seeing you, but said that you almost never left the ranch.”
A flare of something hot slashed through him. Guilt? He didn’t do guilt. “J.D. didn’t have much room to talk. You could hardly blast him off the Big Blue with a stick of dynamite.”
“True,” she said, agreeing with him. “He told me. Truth is, he used to worry that you were too much like him. Too ready to cut yourself off from everything.”
“I’m not cut off.” Hadn’t Dylan said the same thing to him just hours ago? Why did everyone assume that because a man was happy where he was that he was missing out on other things?
“Aren’t you?” It was softly asked, but no less invasive.
He stiffened and the desire pumping through him edged back just a little. Sage hadn’t brought her there to talk about him.
“No,” he assured her, and even he heard the coolness in his tone. “Just because I didn’t visit J.D. doesn’t mean I’m a damn hermit.”
Hermits had a hell of a lot more peace and quiet than he ever got. It wasn’t that Sage didn’t love his family, he did. He only preferred the solitude of his ranch because nothing good ever came of mixing with people—
He cut that thought off and buried it amid the rubble of his memories.
“He missed you.”
Three words that hurt more than he would have thought possible. Sage and J.D. had been at odds for so many years, it was hard to remember a time when things were different. He didn’t want to feel another sting of guilt, but how the hell could he avoid it? J.D. had been old and sick and still Sage hadn’t been able to get past their differences. Would that haunt him for the rest of his life? Would he have yet another regret to add to the multitude he already carried?
Shaking his head, he told her, “Our arguments were legendary. J.D. and I mixed about as well as oil and water. There’s just no way he missed me, so you don’t have to worry about telling pretty lies and trying to make me feel better. I know the truth.”
About that, anyway.
“It’s not a lie,” she said, pausing for another sip of her wine.
What was it about the woman’s throat and the slim elegance of it that fascinated him?
“He did miss you.” She smiled at him again and the warmth in her eyes washed over him. “He told me about your arguments. And really, I think he missed them. He had no one to butt heads with, and that must have been frustrating for a man as strong and powerful as he once was.”
Frowning now, Sage saw that she might just have a point. Even though his relationship with J.D. had never been a close one, he knew that his adoptive father had gone through life like a charging bull. Putting his head down and rushing at problems, determined to knock them out of his way through sheer force of will.
J.D. Lassiter had been the kind of man who let nothing stand between him and his goals. He’d bent the world to his whim and pushed those around him into line—or in Sage’s case, had tried to. For him to be reduced to a sick bed because his heart had turned on him must have been wildly frustrating. Surprisingly, Sage felt a twinge of sympathy for the old man rattle around inside him before he could stop it.
“He told me that he and his wife adopted you and Dylan when you were boys.”
Seemed J.D. had talked her damn ears off. Which gave him hope that somewhere in there, he might have confessed the reasons behind his will.
“They did,” he said and reluctantly was tossed into the past.
He had been six and Dylan four when they went to live on Big Blue. Their parents had just been killed in a traffic accident and they’d clung to each other in an unfamiliar world. Then J.D. and Ellie had swooped in and suddenly, everything was different. Their lives. Their home. Their parents. All new. All so damned hard to accept. At least for Sage. Dylan, maybe because he was younger, had accepted the change in their lives with much more ease.
Sage had refused to let go of his memories...of the life he’d been forced to surrender. He’d bucked against the rules, had fought with his new parents and in general been a pain in the ass, now that he thought about it. He’d grumbled about everything, comparing their new life to the old and the new always came up short.
Ellie had tried relentlessly, through patience and love, to get through to Sage and eventually she’d succeeded. But J.D. hadn’t had the patience to carefully win Sage over. Instead, he’d simply demanded respect and affection and Sage had refused to give either.
The two of them had fought over everything, he remembered now. From doing chores as a kid to driving as a teenager. Sage had instinctively gone in the opposite direction of anything J.D. recommended. There’d been plenty of battles between them, with Ellie stepping in as peacemaker—until she died after giving birth to Angelica.
And the love they shared for Sage’s sister was the one thing he and J.D. had ever agreed on. She had been the glue in their shattered family. Without Ellie there, they would have all floundered, but caring for Angelica kept them all afloat. Then Marlene had moved in and because she hadn’t expected their love, she’d won their hearts.
Shaking his head now, Sage reached for his wine and gulped it down as if it were water. The waiter appeared, delivering their meals, and for a moment or two, there was silence. Then they were alone again and Colleen finally spoke.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring back unpleasant memories.”
“You didn’t,” he lied, smoothing his voice out as easily as he mentally paved over memory lane.
“Okay.” She took a small bite of her ravioli, then chewed and swallowed. “Well, I’ve been talking forever. Why don’t you tell me about your ranch?”
Sage stared at her for a long minute as he tried to figure out what she was up to. But damned if he could see signs of manipulation on her features.
So he started talking, grateful to be in comfortable territory. He watched her face as she listened to him, and enjoyed the shift and play of emotions she made no attempt to hide. But as he told her about his place, Sage realized something. He wasn’t going to be getting the information he needed tonight. She was either really skillful at turning the conversation away from her—or she was as sweet and innocent as she appeared to be. But either way, it was going to take longer than he’d thought to find out exactly what she knew.
Oddly enough, that thought didn’t bother him at all.
* * *
“You can’t be serious.” Laura Falkner dropped into her favorite chair and stared up at her daughter as if she’d just sprouted another head. “Three million dollars?”
Colleen drew a deep breath and realized that over the past few days, she had actually gotten used to the idea of having three million dollars. Okay, it was still a little weird to know that she wasn’t going to have to worry about paying her cable bill—or anything else. But she’d finally come to grips with the idea that J.D. had meant for her to have this. That he’d wanted to help her reach her dreams, and she only wished that she could look him in the eye and say thank you.
Now, seeing her mother’s reaction to her news made Colleen excited all over again. She was so glad she’d waited a few days to tell her mom. Colleen had wanted to get everything in order, have her plan set in stone so her mom couldn’t argue with her over any of it. It hadn’t been easy to wait. The past three days had been a whirlwind of activity. She’d hardly had a chance to really sit down and appreciate just how much her life had changed.
And thanks to J.D.’s generosity, her mother’s life was about to change, too.
Looking around the apartment she and her mom had shared when they first moved to Cheyenne, Colleen smiled. There were good memories here, but soon her mother would be making new memories. Enjoying the dreams she’d always tucked aside. And that pleased her, even though she knew she would miss her mom being so close by.
“I’m completely serious,” Colleen replied, sitting in the chair opposite her mother. She reached out and took her mom’s hands in hers. “It’s all true. I’m going to get my nurse practitioner’s license and buy myself a cabin in the mountains as soon as possible.”
“Honey, that’s wonderful.” Laura pulled her hands free of her daughter’s grasp, then cupped Colleen’s face between her palms. “It’s been your dream for so long, having a rural practice.” Leaning back in her chair, she smiled even more broadly. “I’m delighted for you. Of course I was so sad to hear that Mr. Lassiter had died, but it was so good of him to remember you.”