“Okay,” he said in a shaky voice.
Carson took a few steps back, ready to catch him if he suddenly wanted to get off. But he didn’t. “Good man.”
“You look like a real cowboy!” his mother called out. “I’m so proud of you!”
“Thanks.”
Moving to the front of the pony Carson said, “I’m going to take hold of the bridle and walk Goldie. You keep holding on to the pommel so you can feel what it’s like to ride her. Does that sound okay to you?”
Johnny nodded, but was biting his lip.
“We’ll only go a few feet, then we’ll stop.”
“Okay,” the boy murmured.
Carson started to walk. Goldie cooperated. When he stopped, she stopped. “How did that feel? Do you want to keep going?”
“Yes.”
“Good for you. I’ve seen ten-year-olds out here who started bawling their heads off for their moms about now.” He moved again and just kept going until they’d circled the corral. “You just passed your first lesson with flying colors, Johnny.” He heard clapping and cheers from Tracy.
A big smile broke out on his face. “Thanks. Can I go around by myself now?”
That’s what he’d been hoping to hear, but you never knew. “Why not? Let me show you how to hold the reins. If she goes too fast, just pull back on them a little. Ready?” He nodded.
“I’m going to give Goldie a little tap on her hind quarters to get her going. Okay?”
“Yup.”
Suddenly they were off at the same speed as before, but without his help. Carson walked over to the fence where Tracy was hanging over it.
“Hey—I’m doing it. I’m riding!” he cried out.
“You sure are,” she called back. “I can’t believe it!”
“It’s easy, Mom.” He circled one more time. “Now it’s your turn.”
Carson saw the expression on her face and chuckled. “Yeah, Mom. It’s easy. Now it’s time for you. Better not let your son show you up.”
“He already has. I’m quaking in my new leather boots.”
“I shivered my first time, too, but I promise it will be okay. Annie’s a gentle, sure-footed mare.”
She got down off the fence and walked around to enter the corral. Carson waited until Goldie had come up to him before he removed the boy’s feet from the stirrups and pulled him off. “Give her a rub on the forelock, then she’ll know you had a good time.”
Johnny did his bidding without any hesitation. “Can I give her some more oats?”
“Of course.” He handed him the reins. “Go ahead. You know what to do.”
While he walked her over to the feed bag, Carson called to Bert to bring out Annie, and then he made the introductions. “Bert Rawlins, this is Tracy Baretta. Bert has been running the stable for years.”
Tracy shook his hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“The feeling’s mutual, ma’am. Annie’s saddled and ready to go.”
Carson reached for the reins and handed them to Tracy. “Let’s see how good a teacher I am.”
There was more green than gray in her eyes today. They were suspiciously bright. “You already know. My son’s over there feeding that pony like he’s been living on this ranch for a month.”
Nothing could have pleased Carson more. He watched her move in front of the bay and rub her forelock. She nickered on cue.
“This is my first time, Annie. Don’t let me down.” Pulling on the reins, she started walking around the corral just as her son had done.
Carson decided the brown horse with the black mane and tail provided the perfect foil for her gleaming blond hair. When she came around, he helped her into the saddle and adjusted her stirrups. “Would you like me to walk you around?”
“I think I’ll be all right.” What did they say about a mother walking into a burning building for her child?
He handed her the reins and gave the horse’s rump a tap. Annie knew what to do and started walking. Halfway around the arena, Carson knew Tracy would be all right.
“Hey, Mom—it’s fun, huh?”
“It will be when I’ve had a few more lessons.”
Annie kept walking toward Carson. He looked up at Tracy. “Want to go around one more time, pulling on the reins to the right or left?”
“Sure.”
He was sure she didn’t, but she was game.
“This time, give her a nudge with your heels and she’ll go.”
The second she made contact, Annie started out. It surprised Tracy, knocking her off balance, but she righted herself in a hurry.
“If she’s going too fast, pull on the reins and she’ll slow down.”
Little by little she made it around the enclosure, urging the horse in one direction, then another.
“You’re doing great, Mom!”
“You both are. I think that will be all for today.”
Carson signaled Bert to take care of the horses. “Come on, Johnny.” He walked over to help Tracy, but she was too quick for him. She flung her leg over and got down on her own. Whether she did it without thinking or didn’t want help, he didn’t know.
“Are we going for a Jeep ride now?”
“Would you like that, partner?”
“Yes. Then can we come back to see Goldie? I think she’ll miss me.”
Johnny was showing the first signs of a horse lover. Either it was in you, or it wasn’t. “I’m sure she will.”
The three of them got back in the Jeep. For the next hour, he gave them a tour of the property so they could get their bearings. Johnny talked up a storm while a quieter Tracy sat back and took in the sights. As they neared the ranch house, his cell phone rang. The caller ID indicated it was the district ranger for the Bridger-Teton National Forest.
“Excuse me for a minute. I have to take this,” he said to them before answering. “Dave? What’s up?”
“There’s a man-made fire started up on the western edge of the forest bordering your property.”
Carson grimaced. Tourist season always brought on a slew of forest fires.
“I’ve assembled two crews and am asking for any volunteers who can help stamp it out to meet up at the shadow rock trailhead,” Dave continued. “There’s not much wind. I think we can contain it before it spreads.”
Before hanging up, Carson said, “I’ll rustle up as many of the hands as I can and we’ll be there shortly.”
This would happen today, of all days. The hell of it was, with his disease, he didn’t dare help fight the fire. Smoke was his enemy. All he could do was bring help and wear his oxygen apparatus.
Johnny looked at him. “Do you think I can take another ride on Goldie after dinner? I want to turn her in different directions and do stuff with her.”
“I suppose that’s up to your mother.” Carson’s gaze flicked to Tracy. “Did you hear that, Mom? What do you say?”
Chapter Three
Tracy heard it. In fact, she heard and saw so many things already, she was starting to experience turmoil. Johnny was eating up all the attention Carson showered on him. It would continue nonstop until next Saturday when they flew home.
With all their own family and work responsibilities, none of Johnny’s uncles could give him this kind of time. Not even Tony had spent every waking hour with their son in the due course of a day. No father did, unless they were on vacation. Even then there were other distractions.
Few fathers had the skills or showed the infinite patience of this ex-marine rancher who seemed to be going above and beyond any expectations. He had to be a dream come true for her son, who’d been emotionally starving for a male role model since Tony’s death.
When she’d accepted the invitation to come to the ranch, she hadn’t realized these former soldiers would spend their own personal time this way. She had assumed the ranch staff would offer activities to entertain them. Period.
This was different.
Carson was different.
By giving Johnny that photo of his father, Carson had formed a bond with her son that wasn’t going to go away. Carson might not see what was happening, but every moment invested for Johnny’s sake increased her son’s interest.
Tracy couldn’t allow that to happen. Before long they’d be leaving this place, never to return. Johnny was still dealing with his father’s death. They didn’t need another crisis after they got home. She had to do something quickly to fix things before he got too attached to this incredible man. Tracy had to acknowledge that, so far, he was incredible, which was exactly what made her so uneasy.
While he’d driven them around the breathtaking property, giving them fruit and water, she’d sat in the back of the Jeep planning what she would say to Carson when she could get him alone. Another lesson at the corral after dinner was not an option.
Tonight after they’d eaten, she and Johnny would watch a movie in their cabin until he fell asleep. Then she’d phone Carson and have an important talk with him. Once he understood her concerns, he would make certain his partners spent equal time with Johnny. By the time he pulled up in front of their cabin to let them out, she felt more relaxed about her decision.
“I kept you longer than planned, but we’re still in time for lunch.”
Johnny looked up at him. “What are you going to have, Carson?”
“I think a grilled cheese sandwich and a salad.”
“Me, too.”
Since when? Tracy mused.
Carson tipped his Stetson. “See you two inside.”
She slid out, not wanting to analyze why what he just did gave her a strange feeling in her tummy, as Johnny was wont to say. “Come on, honey. Don’t forget your mustang.”
To her relief, Carson drove off. “Let’s use the restroom first, then maybe we’ll find some other kids and you can play with them.”
A few minutes later they entered the dining room. Ross was seated at a larger table with some tourists, including a couple of children. He waved her over. “Come and sit with us, Tracy. We’re all going to do some more fishing after we eat and hope you’ll join us.”
Bless you, Ross.
“Johnny? Meet Sam Harris, who’s seven, and Rachel Harris, who’s nine. They’re from Florida. This is Johnny Baretta from Ohio. He’s six.”
“I’m almost seven!”
Tracy smiled. “That’s true. Your birthday is in a month.” He’d be one of the older ones in his class in the fall.
After they sat down, Ross finished introducing her to Monica and Ralph Harris, who were marine biologists. The Tetons had to be a complete change of scenery for them, too.
Soon the waitress came over and took everyone’s order. Carson still hadn’t come. Tracy knew Johnny was looking for him.
Sam, the towheaded boy, glanced at Johnny. “How long are you here for?”
“A week.”
“Same here. Then our parents have to get back to work.”
“Oh.”
“Where’s your dad?” Rachel asked.
Johnny had faced this question many times, but Tracy knew it was always painful for him. “He died in the war.”
“That’s too bad,” she said, sounding genuinely sad. “Do you like to fish?”
“My dad took me a couple of times.”
“We’ll catch our limit this afternoon,” Ross chimed in, no doubt anxious to change the topic of conversation.
By the time lunch arrived, Carson had come into the dining room and walked over to their table, but he didn’t sit down. Ross introduced him to everyone while they ate. “Mr. Lundgren’s great-great-grandfather purchased this land in 1908 and made it into the Teton Valley Ranch.”
“The ranch house was a lot smaller than this in the beginning,” Carson informed them.
“You’re sure lucky to live here,” Sam uttered.
“We’re lucky you came to visit.”
Carson always knew the right thing to say to make everyone feel good.
“To my regret, something’s come up and I won’t be able to join you this afternoon, but Ross is an expert and will show all of you where to catch the biggest fish. When you bring them in, we’ll ask the cook to fix them for your dinner. There’s no better-tasting trout than a German brown.”
“He ought to know,” Ross interjected. “He was fishing the Snake with his grandpa when he was just a toddler.”
Everyone laughed except Johnny, who’d become exceptionally quiet.
“Enjoy your day. See you later,” Carson said. His glance included Tracy and Johnny before he hurried out of the dining room.
“Where’s he going?” her son whispered.
“I don’t know, honey.” Something had come up. Though he’d shown nothing tangible, she’d felt his tension. “He runs this ranch with his friends and has a lot of other things to do.” Thank heaven.
“Do we have to go fishing?” He’d only eaten half of his grilled cheese and didn’t touch the green salad, which was no surprise.
“Yes.” Her automatic instinct had been to say no, because she was afraid to push him too hard. But right now she decided to take the psychologist’s advice and practice a little tough love. “It’ll be fun for both of us. I’ve never been fly fishing and want to try it.”
“Okay,” he finally muttered. At least he hadn’t fought her on it. “But I bet I don’t catch one.”
“I bet you do. Think how fun it will be to phone your grandparents tonight and tell them everything.”
This was the way their vacation was supposed to be. Doing all sorts of activities with different people. Unfortunately, Carson had gotten there first and had spoiled her son. Nothing and no one was more exciting than he was, even Tracy recognized that.
Ross got up from the table. “I’ll bring the van in front and we’ll go.” He came around to her side. “Is everything all right?” He’d assumed there’d been a hard moment at the table for Johnny. He’d assumed correctly, but for the wrong reason. She couldn’t tell Ross what was really going on inside Johnny, not when these wonderful marines were doing everything in their power to bring her son some happiness.
She smiled at him. For once this wasn’t about Tony, or Johnny’s sensitivity to a child’s question. This was about Carson. “Everything’s fine. Honestly. See you in a minute.”
Sam got out of his chair and came over to Johnny, who was putting another roll of caps into his mustang. “Where did you get that cap gun?”
“In Jackson. Carson took us.”
He turned to his parents. “Can we go into town and buy one?”
“I want one, too,” Rachel chimed in.
Their mother gave Tracy that “what are you going to do?” look. Tracy liked her. “Maybe after we’re through fishing.”
Tracy took her son aside. “Why don’t you go out front and let them shoot your gun for a minute?”
“Do I have to?”
“No, but it’s a good way to make friends, don’t you think?”
A big sigh escaped. “I guess.” He turned to Sam. “Do you guys want to try shooting some caps outside?”
“Heck, yes!”
They both ran out and Rachel followed. Tracy walked over to the parents who thanked her.
“I’m glad Johnny has someone to play with. After dinner we could all drive into town and take you to the Boot Corral. You can get a cap gun and cowboy hats there, in fact, everything Western.”
“That’s a wonderful idea!”
“I’m afraid my son would sleep in all his gear and new cowboy boots if I let him.”
Both Harrises grinned as they headed out of the dining room for the foyer. “This is a fabulous place,” Ralph commented. “I wish we could stay a month.”
Tracy understood how he felt. She was grateful his children would be here for Johnny. If she could drum up enough activities that included them until they flew home, maybe a talk with Carson wasn’t necessary. She needed to let things play out naturally before she got paranoid. No doubt other families with children would be staying here, too, and her worries would go away.
The next time Johnny brought up Carson’s name, she’d impress upon him that the owner of the ranch had too many responsibilities to be on hand all hours of the day.
Unfortunately, his name surfaced after their wonderful trout dinner when they’d all decided to go into town and do some shopping.
“I don’t want to go, Mom. Carson’s going to give me another lesson on Goldie.”
“But he’s not here, honey. We’ll have to wait until tomorrow. Tell you what. After we get back from town, you and the kids can go swimming. How does that sound?”
He thought about it for a minute before he said, “Okay.” Convincing him was like pulling teeth, but he liked the Harris children well enough to give in.
As it turned out, once they were back from town loaded with hats, guns and more ammo than they could use in a week, they realized it was too cool outside to swim. Monica suggested they play Ping-Pong in the game room off the dining room.
Tracy agreed and told Johnny to go along with them. She’d come back to the ranch house as soon as she’d freshened up. When she walked in the bedroom for their jackets, her cell phone rang. She checked the caller ID. It had to be her mother-in-law calling.
“Hello, Sylvia?”
“No, it’s Natalie. We came over for dinner before we leave on our trip in the morning. I’m using her phone to call because I can’t find mine. How are you doing by now? Or, more to the point, how’s Giovanni? Is he begging to go back home? I’ve wondered how he would handle things. I guess you realize our father-in-law is worried about him.”
That was no news. Since Tony’s death, his father had tried to step in as father and grandfather.
“If you want to know the truth, things are going so well it’s got me scared.”
“What do you mean?”
“Mr. Lundgren might be a former marine, but he’s the owner of this ranch and is this amazing cowboy who’s showing Johnny the time of his life. My son has a new hero.”
“Already?”
“I’m afraid so. You wouldn’t recognize him.”
“Why afraid?”
“That was a wrong choice of words.”
“I don’t think so. How old is this guy?”
Natalie always got to the crux. “Maybe twenty-nine, thirty. I don’t know.”
“Is he a hunk?”
“Nat—”
“He is!”
“Listen. I’d love to talk more, but I don’t have time. This nice couple with two children is watching out for Johnny in the game room and he’s waiting for me.”
“You mean he’s playing on his own without you?”
“I know that sounds unbelievable. In a nutshell, he’s had his first horseback ride on the most beautiful golden pony you’ve ever seen, and he’s in love with her.”
“Her?”
“He named her Goldie. You should see him riding around in the saddle like a pro, all decked out in Western gear and a cowboy hat. We’ll bring the same outfit home for Cory.”
“You actually got him over his fear long enough to ride a horse?” She sounded incredulous. Tracy understood. Since Tony’s death, Johnny showed reluctance to try anything new.
“Mr. Lundgren gave him his first lesson.”
“How did he accomplish that?”
Tracy told her about the photo of his father Carson had given him at the airport. “That was the magic connection that built his trust.”
“You’re right. He sounds like some wonderful guy. What’s his wife like?”
Tracy gripped the phone tighter. “He’s not married. Now, I really have to go. Have a great time on your trip to New York. We’ll talk when I get back. Give our love to the family. Ciao, Nat.”
There were no words to describe the ex-marine that would do him justice, so it was better not to try. No sooner had she disconnected than the phone on the bedside table started ringing. She assumed it was the front desk calling. Maybe it was Monica. She picked up. “Hello?”
“Hi, Tracy. It’s Carson. Am I disturbing you?”
His deep voice rumbled through her. She sank down on her twin bed. After discussing him with Natalie, she needed the support. “Not at all. I was just on my way over to the ranch house to play Ping-Pong with the others.”
“That sounds fun,” he said before he started coughing. “I’m sorry about today. I’d fully intended to take you fishing and give Johnny another horseback riding lesson.”
She gripped the phone a little tighter. “Please don’t worry about that. Ross did the honors. Even I caught a twelve-incher. It was my first time fly fishing. I must admit it was a real thrill to feel that tug and reel it in.”
“How did it taste?”
“Absolutely delicious.”
“That’s good,” he murmured before coughing again.
She moistened her lips nervously for no good reason. “I take it you had to deal with an emergency.”
“You could say that. A couple of college kids out backpacking in the forest didn’t do a good enough job of putting out their campfire. It took several crews of rangers and forest service workers to keep it from spreading too far onto ranch property.”
Her breath caught. That was why she’d felt his tension at the table. “How much did it burn?”
“Only a few acres this time.”
“This time?”
“It happens every year.” Suddenly he was hacking again. “Some fires are more devastating than others.”
“Does that mean you were breathing smoke all day?”
“No. I rounded up the hands and drove them to the fire in shifts, but I took oxygen with me.”
“Even so, you shouldn’t have been near there with your problem,” she said before she realized her voice was shaking.
“There was no one else to do the job. Undeserving as I am, I have to try to save what my grandfather willed to me.”
She got to her feet. “What do you mean by undeserving?”
“Forget my ramblings. It slipped out by accident.”
“And I heard it, which means you inhaled too much smoke today and don’t feel well. You ought to be in bed.”
“A good night’s sleep is all I need. I’ll let you go so you can join your son. It would be better not to tell him about the fire.”
“Agreed.” She couldn’t let him hang up yet. “Carson, how long were you in the hospital?”
“About five weeks. From the end of January to the beginning of March.”
“Were you all suffering from the same illness?”
“On our ward, yes.”
His cough worried her. “Are you getting better?”
“We’re certainly better than we were when we were flown in.”
“I mean, are you going to get well?”
“We don’t know.”
She frowned. “You mean the doctor can’t tell you?”
“Not really. They’re doing studies on us. The day before we left the hospital, a general came to talk to us about asking Congress for the funding to help our cause.”
“The Congress doesn’t do enough,” she muttered.
“Well, at least he came to our floor and said he’s rooting for us, so that’s better than nothing.”
“Then you could have a lifelong ailment.”
“That’s right, but we can live with it, even if no one else can. The ranch house gets pretty noisy when the three of us have a coughing fit together.”
He tried to make light of it, but she wasn’t laughing. “You’re very brave.”
“If you want to talk brave, let’s talk about your husband. Why did he join the Marines?”
“His best friend went into the military and got killed by friendly gunfire. It tore Tony apart. He decided to join up to finish what his friend had started. We were already married, but I could tell he wanted it more than anything. We were lucky to go to Japan together before he was deployed to Afghanistan. It doesn’t happen often that a marine can go there with his wife.”
“You’re right.”
“During 9/11 I saw those firefighters run into those torched buildings and I wondered how they did it. Then I met Tony and understood. It’s in his genes, I guess.”
“Those genes saved lives, Tracy. That’s why you can’t talk about him in the same breath you talk about me and the guys. We’re no heroes.”
But they were.
“You shouldn’t have gone near that fire today.”
“That’s the second time you’ve said it.”
“I’m sorry. Johnny’s been worried about you, too.”
“Tracy,” he said in a deep voice, “I appreciate your concern more than you know. I haven’t had anyone worry about me in a long time. Thanks for caring. We’ll see each other at breakfast. Good night.”
He hung up too fast for her to wish him the same. Afraid he’d be up all night coughing, she knew that if she didn’t hurry to the game room she’d brood over his condition. And his state of mind, which was none of her business and shouldn’t be her concern. But to her chagrin, she couldn’t think about anything else on her way to the ranch house.